Teenager son or daughter smoking at age 12 between 15 yrs of ages.

Sexy Babe

Sexy Babe

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I am wondering what would you do, if you find out your teenager son or daughter smoking at age 12 between 15 yrs old ?

I don't know if some of you parents have gone through with that situations or not ?
 
Sexy Babe said:
I am wondering what would you do, if you find out your teenager son or daughter smoking at age 12 between 15 yrs old ?

I don't know if some of you parents have gone through with that situations or not ?
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I'm not a father yet but if that happened, just look at my avatar. I kid. I kid. Obviously, arguing or punishing will not help at all and will only make your kids not confiding in you. I guess you can just talk about it and show some horrible pictures of the effects smoking can have on human body.... If he/she's still ignoring you... there's not much you can do about it. he/she will smoke at college anyway without you around or smoke at friend's house.

I hope that helps... somewhat
 
Well, my brother started smoking at 9.

My mother knew and tried to stop him, but couldn't...

But he gave up smoking at 25 or so.

So, I don't know what to tell you.

Maybe reduce their pocket money?
 
Well, It is hard and I tried so hard to tell my kids to quit smoking and all. They said that they have gone through abusive situations with their dad. I am trying to get full custody of them and help them to quit smoking. My daughter said that if she do that she prolly going to kill herself. That really scares me, bec she showed me her scars on her wrists and no one noticed it, except me and my husband. Their father and grandparents are forcing them, not to let them move in with me and my husband and told them, " If you both going to move in with your mom and ur stepdad that you will never never see us ever again" I have heard that threaten and b.s from them for many years, bec I have been through abusive with my ex husband for 12 yrs and he is still in this area, where I live now. I felt that he is full of b.s dramas.

I guess that I am going to do what I have to do and fight for my children's life and try to get full custody of them. Bec they fear for their life and it's hard, when my kids said "Mom, I want to live with you and stepdad".. but then when they were threaten by thier father and grandparents.. They would say, "Don't get me involved" I told kids that I am not giving up. My son said do whatever you have to do, but don't get me involved. As for my daughter, She once live with me, but moved in with her dad bec mother and daughter issues. But when she came and visit me more and more. We seems get along real great and she would admit to me and say "Mom, I wish that I would never moved in with dad" Bec they felt like they are paychecks to him, not being love and all. It is soo stressful for me. Should I tell the lawyer the truth that my kids smoking, bec of what they went through or should I just keep quiet and fight for my kids or should I let them go?

There are a lot of things in my mind now. Just hope that I am doing right things to do something for my kids and thier safety.

Thanks for reply me back with your advices.
 
All i can say is that you need to talk to lawyer and tell the lawyer you want custody of the kids.

Then for sure the kids need therapy and talk about it openly with their couneslors. Then you find pictures of how smoking affect lungs and need to show them pictures of how smoking can hurt them. YOu need to talk to them and tell them what smoking may cause. not be able to smell the flowers, trees, etc and foods? using oxygen full times when they are not able to breath on their own? from what I was told that Chronic lung disease is something that you will suffer for the rest of your life. Once damage is done. Its life! so that is something to keep in mind.

and also they need to come and see my mom. See how my mom is doing with using oxygen full times and cant breath when she walk to bathroom. She have to use 3 different medicines to keep her able to breath easily. It is not a funny disease. You cant walk like normal before.

She cant go outside when it is humid or when its raining as she cant breath? She said she noticed it is easier to breath in winter when its more cold than summer. she cant breath when shes in shower? it affect her breathing....

would they want to have sponge bath every day?? never to take shower or bath again??? so think of that...
 
jiro123 said:
I'm not a father yet but if that happened, just look at my avatar. I kid. I kid. Obviously, arguing or punishing will not help at all and will only make your kids not confiding in you. I guess you can just talk about it and show some horrible pictures of the effects smoking can have on human body.... If he/she's still ignoring you... there's not much you can do about it. he/she will smoke at college anyway without you around or smoke at friend's house.

I hope that helps... somewhat
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Yes, that´s correct.
 
My both teenage boys got my hubby to quit smoke in April 2005. They convinced him how bad health smoking is etc.... Before my hubby quit smoking... He smoke outside.

We thought my both sons aware what tabacoo is about... and look at us as non-smokers... Unfortunlately, my oldest son (15 years old) smoking since last year thru his peers... :cool:

We including my youngest son convinced him that it would lead him to addict tabacoo if he continue smoking... and then remind him about his Daddy... He kept saying... "Yes, yes, yes I know.. I know... I know... but I don´t like being left out because their friends are smoking... - I don´t smoke when I am alone or whatever but hang with his friends... yes sometimes..." *sigh* :roll: I can see that I do not need to repeat him about negative health issue because he know it... All what I do is remind him repeatly how expensive smoking is... keep open disscussion with him... how horrible smelly he is.... (his clothes).... I rather to encourage him to give up smoking than force or punish him...
 
Yeah, I agree with you all and your advices. I found me a lawyer and will talk to him tmw about the joint custody and see if I have the right to keep both kids, without getting in trouble and all. I have tried my hardest best to talk to my daughter into quiting smoking than being so mad at her, punish her and all. It is hard, bec she have gone through abusive situations with her dad. But I am so glad that my son quit smoking, bec he dont like the way the cigs smell and fear that he will loose his taste in eating those good delicous foods and all that. My daughter know about the situations about smoking and all that. If I get full custody of my both kids that I will be sure that my daughter will quit smoking and have better life with me and my husband instead of staying with her abusive dad. I will let you all know how it goes with my Lawyer later and all that.
 
I've thought about that since I smoke :(
If my kid started smoking, I'd lock them up in the house for a week, no school or nothing. And I would stay home from work and watch em like a hawk. I know I am 'crazy' but it's a habit that is so so so hard to stop.
 
Oh ouch.. I don't do that to my kids.. Bec of the way their father is and all that. I am trying to be flexable mom and not being toooo controling and strict on my kids. I am starting to be open and understanding what is going on with my kids with their abuisvie situations and all. But I hope and pray to God that when I get full custody that I will do everyway to help my daughter to quit smoking and give her a lot of love, attention, respect, talk to her and spend time with my kids more. Maybe that will help her to stop smoking. Who knows. My husband have been involved and trying to help her to quit, too. But he is a smoker also. Uggghhh...

Just wish that there is no laws in here so I can :rifle: my Ex Husband.
 
Kids are so influenced by their peers, I wouldn't be surprised if they just wanted to experiment with it. I think it starts at an early age where you teach them about the consequences of their actions. It helps to use incentives, not necessarily material or financial award, but a good feeling knowing that they have sustained a good level of health.
If they turned to a rebellious phase, then its time for serious diplomacy, aiming the artillery will definitely not get anyone anywhere.
 
Yea, I agree with u. My daughter learned that from her friends. She got that cigs from her friend's mom and smoke it a lot. I have to learn to be patient and try to deal with her situations.
 
Need to spend more time with your kids at the building where smoking aren't allow. ;)
 
Thanks so much Freaky Cat :) Yea, Branson is soo good lil guy and I love him so much.. I still have to teach Foxy to share Branson with me. LOL.. She just want attention from me a lot and push Branson off. LOL.. :)
 
Yeah I agree with you PowerOn. I am doing my best as I can to be there for my kids and all..


Updates with my Lawyer, I went to see my lawyer today and told him everythings what situations going on and all. I got my daughter back and she is living with me and my husband right now. But as for my son, I can't do anything about it. I'm planning on going to hire my lawyer, when I get my SS money on June 3rd and have him work on the Full Custody Papers to have it serve to my ex husband. Wish I could be there to see how he reaction and all. My lawyer said that we have good case against ex husband, bec my kids and I have a lot of history, proofs and all. So hopefully that I will win Full Custody soon. My lawyer said that when my ex husband have been served that he will have 20 days to answer. So I am going to sit back and wait and see what happens. I am glad that I found right lawyer by my daughter's counselor.. I will let you all know how it goes and all.
 
Great.. wish i can see his face when he get served but then i dont wanna see his face. ugh. lol..

Good luck on everything.. YOu will need it!!! HUGS! Im rooting for ya girl! ily sis!
 
Freaky Cat said:
Great.. wish i can see his face when he get served but then i dont wanna see his face. ugh. lol..

Good luck on everything.. YOu will need it!!! HUGS! Im rooting for ya girl! ily sis!
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Thanks so much Freaky Cat.. ILY, too Sis hugssss
 
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