songs in asl?

[combatbarbie]

Hello,
I know you're all probably busy but I've been so inspired by people who do songs in asl that I want to learn. The problem is there isn't anywhere in the area that teaches classes so I've been trying to learn online and I've found it rather dificult. So to make it more fun I decided to try to sign a song and glossed (I hope I used the correct term. I wrote down the signs I think would convey the message) a song but I'm not sure about the grammer or if it even makes sense so I was wondering if you all might take a look and tell me if it works or give me suggestions if time would permit you to. I would appreciate it a lot. Is anyone else as addicted to songs in asl as I am?
This is a link to the actual lyrics
I Dont Wanna Wait lyrics SOLDIERS OF JAH ARMY
this is my gloss (I used "-" to indicate a repeat of the phrase or sign) -
want wait not ---
people past knew do right
now say not (nothing says)
do right do wrong not
wrong easy right hard
everyone weak
only you know how
later you say always tomorrow
want wait not now
something here again not
heard promise -- don't want
seems crazy trust you promise
1 life 1 world 1 chance
want wait not
thinking now
our government do wrong
prejudice leader trust not
army big population
world is in poverty
fragile world fragile air
fragile water issues procrastinate
want wait not now
something here again not
heard promise --- don't want
seems crazy trust you promise
1 life 1 world 1 chance
want wait not -
want wait not games now
oh man
wait not
thinking future end
unavoidable
finished world dead
future remember had voice
had chance had choice
time luxury
population afford not

 

[TWA]

Welcome to AD, CombatBarbie. The subject of ASL songs has been discussed a lot here. People have different feelings about it. If you're interested to know deaf peoples' opinions, do a search.

As for this song, I'd never heard of SOJA before so checked them out on youtube. They're great! I love reggae cause all the bass is easy for me to hear, and the horns too. But this also seems like a complicated song to do with ASL because part of your task, if you want to do it correctly, is creating the rhythm/feeling of the song using your body language. Seems like it might be difficult with this because you've got a slow, heavy bassline, but then the vocals contrast (at least that's what it seems to me) with that.

We'd really have to see you sign it to critique your grammar, since so much grammar is conveyed through body orientation and NMS. Your glosses seem a bit "dumbed down" too. It's good to capture concepts, but don't lose nuance.