Meeting people

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ClearSky

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I have to meet with someone from college to request something. Anyway, I haven't kept in contact with her, but she was one professor who was always nice to me. I am not the type that holds a conversation with people naturally. I talk about what I need to talk about and sometimes talk to them about other issues not at hand. I am not good at keeping in contact with people, and when I need them back for something-I feel like a cheat who use them for my own purpose. It's not that. Normally, I just don't know what to say or how to keep in contact with them. Is it wrong to feel this way?

I never do anything like that in a mean way, but I always worry if they will ever think that way of me. I am also real nervous about meeting her because I just want to get my request because I feel that I owe her something, which I don't mind--but I am afraid that when I meet people in such cases that I will be speechless and look like I am just wanting one thing. I have had a few people when I they would converse with me, and I would respond with them. A lot expect you to be someone you're not like real friendly, then they look at you like weird and not talk to you much. It's annoying, but I can't help it. I am not this mean person. I am just real anxious when it comes to meeting people again after a long time. Sometimes I am not anxious, but sometimes I get real nervous. What is wrong with me?! Am I the only one that feels this way?
 
No, you are NOT the only one because
I am NOT very good at keeping in touch
with people neither.
 
I am like that. And as a result I often get accused of only getting in touch with then when *I want something*. Not true. I just never know what to say when I get in touch with someone. I am not so good at expressing myself sometimes. And then there are some people that I just DON'T want to keep in touch with. ::shrugs::
 
No you're not alone in this, I feel the same way as you do, I hardly keep in touch with my old friends is because I'm not sure if they're thinking of me too... :dunno: and beside I even don't know where they are, but I hope they're doing well in their lives..
 
Sounds like me to the tee...I have touble making eye contact with someone...I will look then look away...and that makes me even more nervous...then I dont ready know what to say...I am what you call shy...and it seems like it is wrote on top of my fore\head...for the person will say [you are shy arent you]...then my face turns red and I get all nervous...so I guess you are not alone.....
blush.gif
 
Every one are not only ones...I had met so many friends in my whole life.. it is hard to remember to keep in touch with alllll of them...

SxyPorkie
 
u are not the onyl one.. i have this same plm.. i sent emails to friends.. but not sent them long time.. they asked what happened to jokes? i was like umm.. told them didnt feel like.. they said WELL KIT then.. i said OK sure.. but i never.. opps.. :( i just hope they dont think worse of me? i just hope they are doing fine? sigh.. so dont feel bad! :)
 
ClearSky said:
I have to meet with someone from college to request something. Anyway, I haven't kept in contact with her, but she was one professor who was always nice to me. I am not the type that holds a conversation with people naturally. I talk about what I need to talk about and sometimes talk to them about other issues not at hand. I am not good at keeping in contact with people, and when I need them back for something-I feel like a cheat who use them for my own purpose. It's not that. Normally, I just don't know what to say or how to keep in contact with them. Is it wrong to feel this way?

I never do anything like that in a mean way, but I always worry if they will ever think that way of me. I am also real nervous about meeting her because I just want to get my request because I feel that I owe her something, which I don't mind--but I am afraid that when I meet people in such cases that I will be speechless and look like I am just wanting one thing. I have had a few people when I they would converse with me, and I would respond with them. A lot expect you to be someone you're not like real friendly, then they look at you like weird and not talk to you much. It's annoying, but I can't help it. I am not this mean person. I am just real anxious when it comes to meeting people again after a long time. Sometimes I am not anxious, but sometimes I get real nervous. What is wrong with me?! Am I the only one that feels this way?
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ClearSky,

What you are describing is called "Networking." You have either friends or acquaintences from wherever you meet them and this is how you get in with people, get job leads, etc, etc, etc. This is a good thing and, for every person who thinks ill of you (chances are they don't), there are others that would be delighted to be acquainted with you. For example, I'm a real estate agent. Did you know that, as I tell people what I do, I get contacts from them or people they know for business? This is how business operates and how you can get in with people. Enjoy it!

Now, that was the "cheerleader" in me. Here's the tough part. Since you are having difficulty speaking with people, I would suggest you take a look at this link to ToastMasters. http://www.toastmasters.org I used to belong to them and will get with them again after I can get some time available, but this is a club that helps people learn how to speak in public effectively. Even if you don't speak in public for a living, you still can use it for (networking . . . see, here we bring that word up again!), as well as helping you speak better and build your self esteem. Trust me, no one is born a natural public speaker and everyone gets nervous. Search them out, find a club you can visit, then come back and post and let us know how it went! :)
 
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