I would like your opinion on something.

whatdidyousay!

whatdidyousay!

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I was talking to my younger sister about her daughter graduation party and
asked my sister how many people would be there. My sister started to tell me that one of the guest is gay and I am thinking why is my sister telling me this. I told her that is not my business and and my sister when on to tell that I will be able to tell that the guest is gay as she "look difference!" WTF!! My sister said this woman is a good friend of her , I wonder if the woman realize what my sister is saying about her behind her back! I think my sister is a bigot to make a statement like this. There is going to be about 30 people at the party and my sister point out that one guest is gay!
 
Maybe she thinks the woman is hot and wants you to be her wingman to help her pick up the gay chick?
 
Maybe it depends on how "different" she looks? If all the rest of the group looks like they stepped out of the J. Crew catalog, and this other woman shows up with tats and chains and a pierced lip, maybe she didn't want you to stare?

I dunno, giving your sisters a little bit of the benefit of the doubt. If it were me, I guess I'd just ask my sister "Why do you mention this?"

Sadly, my own two sisters are hardly ever a point of controversy in my life, so I don't have much experience in asking them to explain themselves. :cool2:
 
My siblings would say anything to me and that's them. But i don't know about your sister. Maybe she's afraid that you would not be open minded and find out at the party and may happen something at the party. So she wanted you to know now before it is too late. BUT i agree with beach girl, to talk with your sister and ask why did you mention this? " is there something i need to know? I am sure she is a nice person and a good frined of yours." something like that.
 
Did your sister say anything outright mean about this girl? The concept of having a homosexual friend could be considered a "novelty" (for lack of a better word) for some. Perhaps she has never had a gay friend before and does not quite know how to act. Maybe you should tell your sister that you do not think it is appropriate for her to point out her friend's sexual orientation (especially considering the girl does not know you). I don't think that your sister has bad intentions (at least from what you told us she said).
 
As a gay person, I don't find this necessarily offensive. Ask your sister why she felt this needed to be brought up and that you don't find this person's orientation an issue. Sounds to me like someone's making an issue of a non-issue.
 
Beach girl said:
Maybe it depends on how "different" she looks? If all the rest of the group looks like they stepped out of the J. Crew catalog, and this other woman shows up with tats and chains and a pierced lip, maybe she didn't want you to stare?

I dunno, giving your sisters a little bit of the benefit of the doubt. If it were me, I guess I'd just ask my sister "Why do you mention this?"

Sadly, my own two sisters are hardly ever a point of controversy in my life, so I don't have much experience in asking them to explain themselves. :cool2:
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I did not ask my sister what she meant by looking "different" Yeah you're right I should ask my sister what she meant. I have no idea why my sister felt the need to tell me this but I thought it was odd.
 
What an odd comment to make.

Don't give it too much weight. Make your own judgment when you meet the person. She is probably just a regular person like anyone.
 
By the way, my comment about "sadly..." was a little tongue in cheek. They tell me all sorts of things and I'm so, so grateful to have them in my life. They never make a point of telling me their friend's sexual habits, though, for which I am very grateful. There is such a thing as Too Much Information. ;-)
 
Same sister who wrote the weird poem for your mother's funeral?

Maybe your sister is just a little different.
 
Maybe she wanted ya to know so you would not stare? Or so there wouldn't be any akward moments. The group I took to A's opening night was about half lesbian. I told the ones that didn't know so that they wouldn't be uncomfortable. Also if they were bringing children they could decide for themselves if they felt it was an appropriate event for them. All went well!
 
Well, I feel ur sister is just "sharing" something with you....that she might not share with others....Sisters, best friends, etc., do tell and say "what's on their minds" a lot. I have a very gay neice, (the way she dresses & walks)...so it's no need to tell anyone she's gay.

She could have just been giving you "the heads up"...in case you didn't know or couldn't tell (?)....But, whatever....people do talk this way, no matter the situation. I'm sure ur sister has told other people that you were "deaf or hard of hearing"...would that make you feel bad or angry?....or glad she did, so you would not be having to repeat it over and over when there is a party or social get-together??...People do "talk"...saying..."he's divorced...or "she's having an affair behind her husband's back."....It's gossip, and we all are guilty of it, no matter what.
 
rockin'robin said:
Well, I feel ur sister is just "sharing" something with you....that she might not share with others....Sisters, best friends, etc., do tell and say "what's on their minds" a lot. I have a very gay neice, (the way she dresses & walks)...so it's no need to tell anyone she's gay.

She could have just been giving you "the heads up"...in case you didn't know or couldn't tell (?)....But, whatever....people do talk this way, no matter the situation. I'm sure ur sister has told other people that you were "deaf or hard of hearing"...would that make you feel bad or angry?....or glad she did, so you would not be having to repeat it over and over when there is a party or social get-together??...People do "talk"...saying..."he's divorced...or "she's having an affair behind her husband's back."....It's gossip, and we all are guilty of it, no matter what.
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I think the "mentioning of one's hearing situation" is a bit different in that communication is a big part of get-togethers. Sexual orientation is not (unless the get-together is specific to that).
 
Wirelessly posted

LoveBlue: Very pertinent question. Was this party supposed to be an orgy? :naughty:
 
I see no need to mention anyone's sexual orientation. First off, it is not your sister's right to tell anyone's personal business. She wants to tell stuff about herself, that's fine. But to tell anything about anyone else is wrong, wrong, wrong.
 
I see your point Jillio, but as for me I think anyone can guess my orientation at first glance, I'm OOOZING!!!!! LOL
 
Dixie said:
I see your point Jillio, but as for me I think anyone can guess my orientation at first glance, I'm OOOZING!!!!! LOL
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:laugh2: Still yours to tell (or project...whichever!):giggle: Point is, whytell that so and so is gay ahead of time? Like you said, they will probably figure it out when they meet her.:P
 
jillio said:
I see no need to mention anyone's sexual orientation. First off, it is not your sister's right to tell anyone's personal business. She wants to tell stuff about herself, that's fine. But to tell anything about anyone else is wrong, wrong, wrong.
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Most people are unaware of the dos and don'ts when it comes to one's sexual orientation. I see no need for WDYS to scold her sister as her sister is likely new to the concept as are most people in today's society. WDYS could, however, politely inform her sister that she does not believe it to be appropriate to announce people's sexual orientation without their consent.
 
Why does it even matter?

It's not really a singles get-together.

99.99% of the time, I don't even speculate about anyone's sexual orientation because it doesn't affect me.

Because someone has the same-sex orientation doesn't mean they are "on the prowl" and others ought to be notified or warned (in case their gaydar isn't functioning).
 
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