Yeah I'm surprised when I saw second link... Link was work as I created my thread here last year.
Yes, I can see the problem is difficult people who see the different view when somebody vent their feeling out in any forums they choose to or someone to talk with. It´s up to person who decide themselves where they can trust to vent off their feeling to. It's hard for people to convince that it's vent, not whiners...
There are no comparison between venting/ranting with feedback and backstabbing/whining.
Some of diffucilt people, I deal with is watch their mentatiy before do something.
Example:
Person don´t like to talk about sex. All what I do is respect her/him and talk something different than talk about sex. Like what I say that every have different mentality. I have no problem because I watch their mentality careful before say something. I know that I´m not prefect and do make mistakes in the past for not think twice before say something. I sometimes wasnt realized that I pour out my feeling to wrong person whom I thought they are good listener or share the advice.
That´s why I´m careful to deal with people and their mentalities. Yes, I know every human have different mentalities that I can talk anything or not. Some like open mind or not. Some are touchy or not. Some are aggressive or not. Depend on every mentalties. I don´t want to be hassle and have problem to say something without think twice to upset people.
I mean any diffcuilt people in general way like at work place, school, online, stores, clubs, etc.
I´m person who accept their menatliies when I know them from anywhere. (I mean not close friends but general ) One of my co-workers hate to talk about sex. I accept what she is and talk with her in general way, not my close friend. Some of my co-workers can´t stand her but it doesn´t bother me because she´s okay to me. It´s okay when she talk nice. *strug*
But I could be assertive to be positive sometimes when I disagree something.
Many people have hard time to see the sense between aggressive and assertive.
How could you tell the difference between assertive and aggressive?
Assertive is putting forward positively and also in self-confidence way, too. Assertive allow others to see where you make the clear BUT also allows them to feel justified in having an opinion.
Aggressive? It´s different as assertive.
If you are being aggressive, people will remain silent after you talk or they will move right to arguing with you.
While being aggressive comes off as it is "on your own way" or the highway" and can often make others feel wrong".
