How many of the ladies here...

FadedRose

FadedRose

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Have accidently given a guy the impression you're flirting with them because you're reading their lips, or staring at them from across the way only to read their body language and lips?

:giggle::giggle:
I've noticed hearing men think I'm flirting with them or being coy when I'm not. I'm just doing what I need to do to understand the person.
One thing irritated the tar out of me. I forget where I was but I was looking at two people having a convo ( yes I like to eavesdrop sometimes...) reading their lips and the guy must've thought I digged him and proceeded to look me up and down from head to toe which just made my face burn. I left the area due to it. Most of us here have to make lots of eye contact or prolonged eye contact with others because we're reading them...and to someone who doesn't know you're Deaf it comes off as either 1) creepy or 2 ) you're flirting. I looked up flirting body language to see what it was I had done to get that head to toe look to avoid that next time and it was staring, looking at the lips and prolonged eye contact...something most of us here do when reading others. :hmm:

I should get a shirt made that say's " I'm not flirting with you, I'm Deaf ".

what are your stories?

:giggle:
 
I've been told that I smirk flirtatiously. I don't know if that's the Deaf in me or if I'm doing that unconsciously but I laugh internally at alot of people's facial expressions and signs. I have a very intense inner monologue. ;)
 
A few exes didn't like it. And I have been accused of cheating before because of it. But honestly even if I was flirty I hate being looked up and down by strangers.
 
One of the signs of being sexually attracted to someone is looking at their lips so yeah some guys would find it sexy when you lipread them. Then again, they're guys! Some of my ex-boyfriends admitted my lipreading was very sexy to them. :)

The only time I ever got a BAD reaction to my lipreading a guy was in Miami airport. I was flying home from Nicaragua and had to stopover in Miami. Walked up to an angry looking customs agent to show my passport.
He actually said this: "what the hell are you staring at? Do I have something on my face?" And he said this in a very aggressive mean way. I've travelled alot in my lifetime and I've never been treated like this by any custom agent, even the cold unfriendly ones.
So, I said very loudly on purpose, almost yelling: "You want to know what I'm staring at? Your lips. I'm DEAF and I have to read your lips to understand what you're saying." I lifted my hair to show off my hearing aids. His face went beet red when other agents and travellers turned to look at us, it was a very crowded room. He didn't say another word and quickly handed back the passport.
Gave him a big smirk and walked away.
 
warpedpink said:
I've been told that I smirk flirtatiously. I don't know if that's the Deaf in me or if I'm doing that unconsciously but I laugh internally at alot of people's facial expressions and signs. I have a very intense inner monologue. ;)
Click to expand...

I totally get you on the intense inner monologue part. I try very hard sometimes to hide it but damn some hearies just...
walk funny and I just cannot contain what I'm actually thinking.:shock::giggle: If you've ever seen a human stork....well, you get the picture. Reading body language is both a blessing and a curse because as a result of being able to do this really well from being Deaf you just notice more things about how a person stands, walks, sits, or even hold their neck when they walk....I cannot stand people who hold their head to the side if they are not listening to me. It's annoying, people who shuffle their feet when they walk, those who cannot stand still talking on the phone, and most of all the chronic lip lickers...or as I call them the human camels. ya, that's the internal monologue ( there goes the stork again...)

There are two extremes I've been accused of because of how I act because I'm Deaf. It's either 1) I'm rude because I didn't "hear" someone say hello to me or I "ignored" the person when I just didn't hear them and have been accused of being a cold B. 2) I'm flirting when I'm not. I'm a married woman here so it's kind of offensive when that happens. C'mon. Do you really think I'm that kind of person? :eek3:

Typically I'll just go stone cold around the opposite sex if I get the impression they think I'm flirting with them and then I'm labeled the socially inept creep :eek3:.

I give up! :D
 
DeafCaroline said:
One of the signs of being sexually attracted to someone is looking at their lips so yeah some guys would find it sexy when you lipread them. Then again, they're guys! Some of my ex-boyfriends admitted my lipreading was very sexy to them. :)

The only time I ever got a BAD reaction to my lipreading a guy was in Miami airport. I was flying home from Nicaragua and had to stopover in Miami. Walked up to an angry looking customs agent to show my passport.
He actually said this: "what the hell are you staring at? Do I have something on my face?" And he said this in a very aggressive mean way. I've travelled alot in my lifetime and I've never been treated like this by any custom agent, even the cold unfriendly ones.
So, I said very loudly on purpose, almost yelling: "You want to know what I'm staring at? Your lips. I'm DEAF and I have to read your lips to understand what you're saying." I lifted my hair to show off my hearing aids. His face went beet red when other agents and travellers turned to look at us, it was a very crowded room. He didn't say another word and quickly handed back the passport.
Gave him a big smirk and walked away.
Click to expand...

wow, what an (insert word here!). I've been asked " do I have something in my teeth?"...Typically if a person gives me this weird look because I'm staring at their mouth I just lift up my hair to show them I'm Deaf. It never fails or ...just open my mouth and there goes the deaf accent.

Women in particular seem to get really self conscious if you stare at their lips depending on how large chested they are they might get the impression you're also looking there if they are pushed up far enough that you can see both their cleverage and their lips :laugh2:

I've yet to hear a man tell me it's sexy to be lip read, most are uncomfortable with it and will not look directly at me sometimes when speaking to me. It's as if my gaze is too intent. Or maybe I'm just really ugly....:roll: It has to be the crooked nose ( thinks to self ) :)
 
neomayja said:
A few exes didn't like it. And I have been accused of cheating before because of it. But honestly even if I was flirty I hate being looked up and down by strangers.
Click to expand...

It's a nasty feeling if you happen to catch it.
I don't want to see that again. :eek3:
cheating because you're lipreading?
that's an insecure mate to have. I'd slap my husband if he ever said that to me. :giggle:
 
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