Darndest things quoted from kids

SeanB

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Outrageous quotes by kids emailed to me recently...

“Mister, you should say, ‘Excuse me —I tooted.’ ” Addison, age 3 (said to a stranger who passed gas)

“Mom, look! It’s Shrek!” Hugo, age 4 (shouted across a crowded swimming pool while pointing at a bald man)

“My parents won’t have any more babies. My dad had that sperm thing done.” Adam, age 10

“Why do these ladies have such long boobs?” Louise, age 2 (said while walking through the YMCA dressing room)

“I have to turn five so that I can grow up and become a mommy and yell at people.” Molly, age 4

“Would you like some more Pinot Grigio?” Elle, age 5 (said to Grandma during a play tea party, much to the horror of Elle’s mother)

“I don’t like public pools, only the heated saline one in my East Hampton backyard.” Harry, age 5

“Look—a pirate!” Drew, age 3 (said in front of an elderly man with an eye patch)
 
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