Signs That You Are Too Drunk

[rockin'robin]

You lose arguments with inanimate objects.

You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.

Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.

The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.

Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.

You can focus better with one eye closed.

The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.

You fall off the floor...

Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.

Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger...who needs dinner?

Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you.

Your idea of cutting back is less salt.

The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in...

Don't recognize wife unless seen through bottom of glass.

That darned pink elephant followed me home again.

I'm as jober as a sudge.

 

[iSign]

You lose arguments with inanimate objects.

You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.

Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.

The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.

Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.

You can focus better with one eye closed.

The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.

You fall off the floor...

Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.

Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger...who needs dinner?

Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you.

Your idea of cutting back is less salt.

The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in...

Don't recognize wife unless seen through bottom of glass.

That darned pink elephant followed me home again.

I'm as jober as a sudge.

 

[AlleyCat]

I liked the "You lose arguments with inanimate objects."

 

[Glenn]

I remember getting lost in my own house when I was quite drunk. It was a long time ago...

 

[rockin'robin]

I remember going into the hall closet to pee...thinking it was the bathroom...fell flat on the floor and pissed all over meself!

 

[Bottesini]

 

[deafskeptic]

You throw a lit match into the trash can. I did that once.

 

[Steinhauer]

(Picture of a sign saying "Warning Alcohol Impairs Judgement" and shows a person under water kissing a fish)


kissing a fish may also be another sign ....