I need your opinion about my song i wrote

[coolgirlspyer90]

I wrote a song a long time ago, I started to read it and I started editing on some of it.. And I would like for you to read my song and give an opinion on it. It might be a little confusing but Its a song i'm trying to do. thanks.

[Verse 1]
Trying to understand,
Why I’m feeling this way,
My mind keeps spinning,
I can't stop and think.
I close my eyes,
and I see you standing.
I see the stars glowing at night.
Really I have nowhere else to go.
I don’t know what to think anymore

Ohh

[Verse 2]
I can’t stop from you doing what you want
I’m only trying to understand
Why I’m even in this world
To me everything is a dream
Nothing is fake

[Verse 3]
I got to move on..

I don’t know what to do anymore…

Trying to understand..

[Verse 4]

I see the stars glowing at night.
Really I have nowhere else to go.
I can’t stop from you doing what you want
I’m only trying to understand
Why I’m even in this world

[Verse 5]

I close my eyes, and I see you standing
And I'm across from you,

You look to me in my eyes,
All I could ever think of is you...
I can't stop from doing what you want...
I have got to move on...
I'm only trying to understand...

[Ends song]

 

[SCBassist]

Really great choice of words, what music genre do you want to play it? One thing, you might want to establish a little more of a rhyme pattern.

 

[coolgirlspyer90]

Really great choice of words, what music genre do you want to play it? One thing, you might want to establish a little more of a rhyme pattern.

Maybe R&B or Pop... I was trying to make it a little professional..I'm only 14 and I wrote this. But I'm pretty glad I made this tho. Since I love to write I thought I go ahead and try and write a song. And I pretty much came up with this.

 

[SCBassist]

Maybe R&B or Pop... I was trying to make it a little professional..I'm only 14 and I wrote this. But I'm pretty glad I made this tho. Since I love to write I thought I go ahead and try and write a song. And I pretty much came up with this.

Keep editing it, even if its not what you are thinking, something better may come through.

 

[coolgirlspyer90]

Keep editing it, even if its not what you are thinking, something better may come through.

hehe thanks. I actually wrote on a couple of songs..I don't really like them. But i just finished another one. Called Old Memory Book. It has 5 verses.

 

[SCBassist]

I dabbled in songwriting too. Its frustrating sometimes! LOL Mmm, it was back in high school, I think called Never Change Heart. We were a garage band for fun, played mostly covers.

 

[coolgirlspyer90]

I dabbled in songwriting too. Its frustrating sometimes! LOL Mmm, it was back in high school, I think called Never Change Heart. We were a garage band for fun, played mostly covers.

lol, usually i just sing in the basement on the piano or upstairs in my room with my IPod plugged into the speakers blasting loud enough for me to hear the music and I would just sing along to it. My parents don't think I'm that good enough to sing. But really I have no idea if i could sing good. even if I could sing i would need someone else to let me know if I am that good. Usually I sing good on my own music and lyrics. But not really good enough with other music that's already been copyrighted.

 

[SCBassist]

Thats the same hard way I learned to sing - I did back up vocals, but me singing alone? My dog can do better! LOL I'm not in a band right now, so I play a kind of bass karaoke. I play the music on a boombox and play bass along to it.

 

[coolgirlspyer90]

lol, whenever i have my ipod stereo blasting loud, my parents always come in and turn it down in my room, and it annoys me because I can't hear it that way because i'm hard of hearing. And I would just turn it back up again so I can hear it. Sometimes its annoying to have to use an cord for your cochlear implant plugged to your IPod because its so long and it can get caught in things. I like to use the speakers better than the cord.