Hearies view on a CI kid... its a bummer

Today I had the worst experience of listening to a woman talk about the child she supervises in a public school system. This middle school boy has a CI and is mainstreamed...now I don't know how other people feel about that issue and I guess it's a per person basis.. I just know that the PERCEPTION that the hearing woman had of this child and the situation made me extremely upset!! This woman used words like "cognitive, capable" to explain that with the CI's this kids had all it took to make it in the program...behavioraly, cognitivily, and different loads of pooh.... I wanted to scream but seeming this woman had no clue what she was saying.. I didn't say anything. She wasn't even aware that I was HoH.. (probably because she was the one talking) Not that she was being rude...she wasn't at all.. she was amazed at technology and how "normal" it could make a child..

Someone help me out here okay.. I don't know how I feel about CI's for others but personally I will never have one (not a canidate for one anyway which is probably best) I just REALLY REALLY hate the the impression that CI's give to the hearin commmunity about Deaf/HH....It gives the impression that with some technology and a little care a kid can be almost norma.

ARRRRRRRRRRRRGGG..which means one or two things.. I am abnormal and not capable because technology hasn't quite found a way to make me hearing... or all Deaf have to be in specialized schools and not around normal people because they are different.. neither attitudes sit well with me.. and I want to know why this woman who has no idea about Deaf culture or CI's is assigned to a child with a CI...

So you that have grown up with CI's...by your parent's choice.. Does it make you feel weird to be "almost normal" or "almost hearing." do people blow off the CI and accept you without comment or is it like being HH where it will always be an issue somewhere...

feed back desired..

Well my opinion, hearing people have NO BUSINESS ABOUT THE CI!!!! Unless they are relative with a family member who are deaf.

One time I went to the mall looking for the sidekick, one woman was helping me looking for the sidekick, she asked me if I have CI. I'd told her yes, but I decide to pretend that I don't to just testing what was her reaction. So I told her no.

Guess what she did? She kept trying to convience me to get the CI and put my plan for the sidekick wait longer. She was very rude, she asked me why not I get it, I told her it's because I don't want to have surgery on my head, she look at me like I was stupid and told me she don't think there is such any risks, we continuing arguing about the CI for like 30 minutes, till I finally told her that I am not interest to work with someone who try to sell me the sidekick and begging me to get a CI. She quiet and I left the store.

I understand how you feel, ARGHHHHHHHH..... I wish I could've told her "Well it's better for hearing people to just sign without the surgery while we, the deafies, have to get through the surgical so we can finally learn talk, even probably it won't help us."

Those hearing people who think like that are just thinking deaf people need cure while deafies really don't need.

Oi, that lady sounds like the crazy lady that Shel90 spoke to at her husband's picnic.

I hate it when people tell me my implant is a miracle and I've noticed that many hearing expect me to suddenly understand songs on the radio and cds.. Uh-uh it doesn't work like that.

deafskeptic said:

Oi, that lady sounds like the crazy lady that Shel90 spoke to at her husband's picnic.

I hate it when people tell me my implant is a miracle and I've noticed that many hearing expect me to suddenly understand songs on the radio and cds.. Uh-uh it doesn't work like that.

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Agreed, nope. I don't understand the music even though I can hear it clear...

This is exactly what sehl and I have spoken out against so frequently, and then been bashed for speaking out, and told that no one thinks of a CI in this way. Unfortunately,t here are too many educators out there in the mainstream who have never before encountered a deaf child, have to experience or course work in the methodology of deaf education, nor any understanding of the needs of the deaf student. Despite what some may want to beleive, this is a situation that occurs all to frequently. Then the child is underserved in the mainstream, and when they fall behind, they are referred out tothe deaf school and labeled a mainstream failure. It is a completely unjust treatment of deaf children. And those who refuse to believe that it happens every day allow it to continue by refusing to acknowledge it.

Unfortunately,t here are too many educators out there in the mainstream who have never before encountered a deaf child, have to experience or course work in the methodology of deaf education, nor any understanding of the needs of the deaf student.

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Or they encounter the high powered superstar type, and think that ALL implanted kids are like that. Like they think you're either a SuperDeaf, or a slacker type.
I have to admit, I really think that automatic mainstreaming HURT dhh (and other classicly disabled kids) overall. The pro mainstreamers yap and yap about how much better the education is in the hearing schools. For SOME kids yeah......but for other kids they get lumped in with the "Ummmm who's President Bush?" brainless apathetic to learning types who are legion in sped programs.
Most mainstream teachers, including sped teachers have NO clue whatsoever how to teach kids like us. It's like if you don't do well with the generic accomondations they give you, then you're automaticly branded a dumbass slacker. That still makes me so mad, and its been almost ten years since I graduated high school.

deafdyke said:

Or they encounter the high powered superstar type, and think that ALL implanted kids are like that. Like they think you're either a SuperDeaf, or a slacker type.
I have to admit, I really think that automatic mainstreaming HURT dhh (and other classicly disabled kids) overall. The pro mainstreamers yap and yap about how much better the education is in the hearing schools. For SOME kids yeah......but for other kids they get lumped in with the "Ummmm who's President Bush?" brainless apathetic to learning types who are legion in sped programs.
Most mainstream teachers, including sped teachers have NO clue whatsoever how to teach kids like us. It's like if you don't do well with the generic accomondations they give you, then you're automaticly branded a dumbass slacker. That still makes me so mad, and its been almost ten years since I graduated high school.

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It still makes me mad too and it has been almost 20 years since I graduated high school.

People who dont have experiences in deaf ed or deaf studies really do not have the training nor expertise to work with deaf children nor how to meet their needs.

This woman needs to be slapped in the face for saying that CIs make deaf people normal. We are all normal WITH or WITHOUT CIS!!!!

This is seriously FUCKED UP.

People who think all deaf people need a CI are nutty because they won't work for everybody including me.

In high school during my freshman year, I needed a special PE class because of my heart problems, so they just put me into a class with sped people and did things like croquet, even when it was 20F outside. In my later high school years, they didn't put me with those kinds of people, but with regular people who just happen to need special help, like people with CP, to do actual exercises like weight lifting and fun stuff like golf. I was often taught by myself when there were no other regular people in the class and was on the school's golf team for my senior year.

The opposite thing happened with busing. At first, they sent a small bus to my home in the country and I was often the only student on it. Then by my senior year, they put sped people on the bus and some of them would bother me by writing me questions like what's your favorite color?

Unsolicited advices...

I understand how irrtating can be receiving advice from well-meaning people but who are not quite fully oriented on the subject.
It happens to me always with migraine - whenever somebody learns I have it, immediately offers tons of mostly useless advice, sometimes being very pushy at that.

I always try to remember people simply want to help.
I think the same is with people who learned about CI - all they want to do is help, but they don't realise that their advice is not always aprecciated.


Fuzzy

This woman needs to be slapped in the face for saying that CIs make deaf people normal. We are all normal WITH or WITHOUT CIS!!!!

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I think she meant "normal hearing", Shel, that's all.... I agree otherwise we are all normal.


Fuzzy

Audiofuzzy said:

I think she meant "normal hearing", Shel, that's all.... I agree otherwise we are all normal.


Fuzzy

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Not according to what Crystal said

This woman used words like "cognitive, capable" to explain that with the CI's this kids had all it took to make it in the program...behavioraly, cognitivily, and different loads of pooh.... I wanted to scream but seeming this woman had no clue what she was saying.. I didn't say anything. She wasn't even aware that I was HoH.. (probably because she was the one talking) Not that she was being rude...she wasn't at all.. she was amazed at technology and how "normal" it could make a child..


the lady didnt say anything about having "normal" hearing..just that the child is normal cognitively, behaviorally, and so forth. That is what I would have loved to confront that woman about cuz I have been raised with that view too about having good speech skills. I was told that I was so smart cuz I can speak well along with comments like "poor your brother isnt so smart and have to be sent to the special school for deaf children who are failures"..and more. I hate that view...really hate it.

shel90 said:

Not according to what Crystal said

This woman used words like "cognitive, capable" to explain that with the CI's this kids had all it took to make it in the program...behavioraly, cognitivily, and different loads of pooh.... I wanted to scream but seeming this woman had no clue what she was saying.. I didn't say anything. She wasn't even aware that I was HoH.. (probably because she was the one talking) Not that she was being rude...she wasn't at all.. she was amazed at technology and how "normal" it could make a child..


the lady didnt say anything about having "normal" hearing..just that the child is normal cognitively, behaviorally, and so forth. That is what I would have loved to confront that woman about cuz I have been raised with that view too about having good speech skills. I was told that I was so smart cuz I can speak well along with comments like "poor your brother isnt so smart and have to be sent to the special school for deaf children who are failures"..and more. I hate that view...really hate it.

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Its a view that is far too prevalent, and needs to be confronted. The only way to change is is to confront those who hold the mistaken beliefs about their mistaken beliefs. Especially in the educational arena, because it has the potential to do so much harm to so many.

jillio said:

Its a view that is far too prevalent, and needs to be confronted. The only way to change is is to confront those who hold the mistaken beliefs about their mistaken beliefs. Especially in the educational arena, because it has the potential to do so much harm to so many.

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I would have loved to set that woman straight...

It is one thing for heairng people who dont work in the educational field to say things like that but those who work in the field..that's another story.

MissBrittany said:

And If I were deaf, Im pretty sure I would choose to not
have a CI. I believe in the saying "deaf and proud."
But this is just my view.

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And yet - when you say it in that kind of context, its as if you are suggesting that people (like myself) who have a CI have a problem with our identity as being deaf. Its almost like its a requirement that people be PROUD to be deaf....and I can't understand why that is. I'm deaf - its a biological fact- but it sure as heck ain't something I'm proud of, and I know many others (congenitally deaf or latened deaf) who feel the same way. I think that CI's are a personal/family decision and its nobody else's business to stick their noses in those decisions, especially when it doesn't effect them personally.

I've been attacked (both here and on other boards) for saying how successful my CI is, because it "fosters the impression that all CI implantees are as successful as me," and its almost as if I should HIDE the fact that I can hear again (at least to those within certain quarters of Deaf Culture,) lest others hear about it (no pun intended.)

Just what is "hearing normally" anyway? With my CI I can hear better in some situations than my boyfriend who is HEARING. I know some people who are considered profoundly deaf, and yet can use a regular telephone with their HA's..... there is such a vast spectrum of "hearing" that I don't think that anybody really hears "normally."

neecy said:

And yet - when you say it in that kind of context, its as if you are suggesting that people (like myself) who have a CI have a problem with our identity as being deaf. Its almost like its a requirement that people be PROUD to be deaf....and I can't understand why that is. I'm deaf - its a biological fact- but it sure as heck ain't something I'm proud of, and I know many others (congenitally deaf or latened deaf) who feel the same way. I think that CI's are a personal/family decision and its nobody else's business to stick their noses in those decisions, especially when it doesn't effect them personally.

I've been attacked (both here and on other boards) for saying how successful my CI is, because it "fosters the impression that all CI implantees are as successful as me," and its almost as if I should HIDE the fact that I can hear again (at least to those within certain quarters of Deaf Culture,) lest others hear about it (no pun intended.)


Just what is "hearing normally" anyway? With my CI I can hear better in some situations than my boyfriend who is HEARING. I know some people who are considered profoundly deaf, and yet can use a regular telephone with their HA's..... there is such a vast spectrum of "hearing" that I don't think that anybody really hears "normally."

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Easy.....no need to get defensive. This si about the impression an educator gave of deaf children with CI, not specifically about you and how well your CI works.

neecy said:

And yet - when you say it in that kind of context, its as if you are suggesting that people (like myself) who have a CI have a problem with our identity as being deaf. Its almost like its a requirement that people be PROUD to be deaf....and I can't understand why that is. I'm deaf - its a biological fact- but it sure as heck ain't something I'm proud of, and I know many others (congenitally deaf or latened deaf) who feel the same way. I think that CI's are a personal/family decision and its nobody else's business to stick their noses in those decisions, especially when it doesn't effect them personally.

I've been attacked (both here and on other boards) for saying how successful my CI is, because it "fosters the impression that all CI implantees are as successful as me," and its almost as if I should HIDE the fact that I can hear again (at least to those within certain quarters of Deaf Culture,) lest others hear about it (no pun intended.)

Just what is "hearing normally" anyway? With my CI I can hear better in some situations than my boyfriend who is HEARING. I know some people who are considered profoundly deaf, and yet can use a regular telephone with their HA's..... there is such a vast spectrum of "hearing" that I don't think that anybody really hears "normally."

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Please dont get angry or upset with me...
You quoted yourself in my words:
"But this is just my view."

And it is. I have no idea what its like to be deaf.
But if I was that would be my decision. It has nothing
to do with my point of view towards people with CI!!
Thats theirs and your choice!! Im not speaking bad at all
about it!! Some prefer to not get the CI and be deaf.
And some prefer to get the CI and yet they are still deaf
but just want to hear!! Or it was a parental choice!!

NO where in my message when I trying to be offensive!!
If it seemed that way, Im deeply sorry if I hurt anyone
and I apologize.

no no I never meant to suggest you were offensive, it just appeared as if those who are on "the other side" are having an identity problem. Glad to see that's not the case!

neecy said:

no no I never meant to suggest you were offensive, it just appeared as if those who are on "the other side" are having an identity problem. Glad to see that's not the case!

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I apologize again for upsetting you.
I am on no ones side or vice versa.

I was just speaking from my mind about what I thought for myself.

Thank you for re posting and clarifying.

And If I were deaf, Im pretty sure I would choose to not
have a CI. I believe in the saying "deaf and proud."
But this is just my view.

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What does CI have to do with being deaf?
One can't have CI and be "proud deaf"?? May I point out a deaf person with CI is still a deaf person.

Fuzzy