Why Men Cheat...

rockin'robin

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It's usually not because of sex: Only 8 percent of men who cheat said it was because of sexual dissatisfaction. Rather, 48 percent of men who have cheated said it was because of emotional dissatisfaction. Mens' egos are not as strong as they think, and therefore, they are highly susceptible to someone serving them up admiration outside the marriage, especially when the man is not properly connected with his wife. It often starts as emotional infidelity, where he will use a relationship outside the marriage to satisfy an emotional void.

How can you tell if your husband is being unfaithful?

If you ask him and he is extremely defensive and tries to make you feel like you're crazy for suspecting anything, then that's a key indicator. The cheating man does more than lie, he will then try to turn it around and make the woman feel like she's out of line. A man who has not cheated is usually more understanding and shocked. A tremendous push back on his part is an indicator. If he denies it, don't put your head in the sand; start checking his phone.

Are there other signs?

Yes, there are a few: Decrease in sex and eye contact. If you hear a lot about one particular person, usually someone from his work, which is the number one place where people begin affairs, this could also send up a red flag.

Being cheated on can be devastating. Why do we see so many women stay in their marriages after their husbands have cheated?


Women are conditioned to believe that men cheat and they seem to be willing to hang in there. Women tend to think first about the family, thinking "if he will stop I can get through this." And if it works out, then she will have saved her family. The disadvantage is that it causes women to just accept lame apologies or shallow remorse, which makes them highly susceptible to being cheated on again.

So how can you approach the situation if you have suspicions?

First, you need to ask. However, most men will lie repeatedly and only about 7 percent will tell you without being asked. Even worse, about 86 percent of men will lie even after being questioned with evidence.

But you can persist. You can approach it by saying, "If anything is going on, we can handle this if we work through it, but we won't be able to if you continue to lie, so this is your opportunity to be honest."

Suppose you do find out that he has been unfaithful. How can you work together to repair the relationship?

A few things need to happen:
1. He has to be remorseful.
2. He had to understand what he has done wrong on his part
3. He needs to dig deep and understand how he got there. For instance, 77 percent of men who cheat say their best friends have been cheaters.
4. You both need to look at the relationship. Is there physical and/or emotional distance between you? There is often too much fighting and not enough nurturing.

Put time and energy into the marriage: The average American married couple spends 12 to 18 minutes talking per week. You should have a weekly date night without other couples, during which you can't talk about money, work or children. None of those subjects got you to where you are today with your spouse, so go back and find what initially connected you to each other.

You have to be honest with yourself about the relationship. Many women are convinced that you are building a life together and you are "not supposed" to be close when your kids are young, thinking "when they are older, we'll be closer". This is a recipe for disaster. You are supposed to be in love. Sure, you can argue, but there is supposed to be a consistency and you should want to spend time together. You need to put your marriage first, next to children and money.

FOXNews.com - Why Men Cheat
 
I was going to post a smart(_Y_) reply on this thread but this article left me speechless.

Hm... thank you for sharing :)
 
It's usually not because of sex: Only 8 percent of men who cheat said it was because of sexual dissatisfaction. Rather, 48 percent of men who have cheated said it was because of emotional dissatisfaction. Mens' egos are not as strong as they think, and therefore, they are highly susceptible to someone serving them up admiration outside the marriage, especially when the man is not properly connected with his wife. It often starts as emotional infidelity, where he will use a relationship outside the marriage to satisfy an emotional void.

How can you tell if your husband is being unfaithful?

If you ask him and he is extremely defensive and tries to make you feel like you're crazy for suspecting anything, then that's a key indicator. The cheating man does more than lie, he will then try to turn it around and make the woman feel like she's out of line. A man who has not cheated is usually more understanding and shocked. A tremendous push back on his part is an indicator. If he denies it, don't put your head in the sand; start checking his phone.

Are there other signs?

Yes, there are a few: Decrease in sex and eye contact. If you hear a lot about one particular person, usually someone from his work, which is the number one place where people begin affairs, this could also send up a red flag.

Being cheated on can be devastating. Why do we see so many women stay in their marriages after their husbands have cheated?


Women are conditioned to believe that men cheat and they seem to be willing to hang in there. Women tend to think first about the family, thinking "if he will stop I can get through this." And if it works out, then she will have saved her family. The disadvantage is that it causes women to just accept lame apologies or shallow remorse, which makes them highly susceptible to being cheated on again.

So how can you approach the situation if you have suspicions?

First, you need to ask. However, most men will lie repeatedly and only about 7 percent will tell you without being asked. Even worse, about 86 percent of men will lie even after being questioned with evidence.

But you can persist. You can approach it by saying, "If anything is going on, we can handle this if we work through it, but we won't be able to if you continue to lie, so this is your opportunity to be honest."

Suppose you do find out that he has been unfaithful. How can you work together to repair the relationship?

A few things need to happen:
1. He has to be remorseful.
2. He had to understand what he has done wrong on his part
3. He needs to dig deep and understand how he got there. For instance, 77 percent of men who cheat say their best friends have been cheaters.
4. You both need to look at the relationship. Is there physical and/or emotional distance between you? There is often too much fighting and not enough nurturing.

Put time and energy into the marriage: The average American married couple spends 12 to 18 minutes talking per week. You should have a weekly date night without other couples, during which you can't talk about money, work or children. None of those subjects got you to where you are today with your spouse, so go back and find what initially connected you to each other.

You have to be honest with yourself about the relationship. Many women are convinced that you are building a life together and you are "not supposed" to be close when your kids are young, thinking "when they are older, we'll be closer". This is a recipe for disaster. You are supposed to be in love. Sure, you can argue, but there is supposed to be a consistency and you should want to spend time together. You need to put your marriage first, next to children and money.

FOXNews.com - Why Men Cheat

Not news to me. This is what I have been telling people...
 
Men cheat because they feel entitled to do so. The blame the wife for not being attentive enough excuse is bullsh*t.

Just for the record, I know plenty of women who have cheated on their spouses.
 
They find someone better than you? :dunno:
 
Because they're well-known?

I've cheated in the past, people made a lot of assumptions that are just wrong.
So, from that experience, I've learned not to judge.

People waste their lives speculating and asking questions like "ooh, so, umm this [insert celebrity name] did this and that... what do you think?"

Its actually like, get with it, discuss the future.
 
Except in the case of Clinton, what kind of example does that set? He lied under oath. A leader who lacks integrity isn't exactly confidence inspiring.
 
I've always been in awe of couples being married 20-30-40-50 years or more! It warms my heart to see older people walking together, even holding hands.

It's my belief that communication is the key....being attentive, caring and being on the same wave-length makes a strong marriage. Putting each other first, being able to overlook the small stuff....Taking care of urself and each other too.
 
If we ditched every politician that had a case of the wandering weenie, we wouldn't have any politicians left.

I think that a good relationship requires two mentally healthy adults. Hubby and I went through individual therapy early in our marriage and it helped a lot. Each person brings his/her own personal issues into the relationship. I've been married 18 years. It flew by so quickly that I can't believe it!
 
Because they're well-known?

This makes me thing of something I thought about the other day when I was surfing the TV. The show called "Sex Rehab".

Think about that. They put a man addicted to sex on a TV show as he goes through sex addiction rehab. What's going to happen now that he's famous? :)


I agree though. Men, and woman for that matter, who are cheating is rarely a matter of sexual desire. If you meet someone and you are enjoying their company and seem to be getting along very well with them. Then it's understandable that you'd want to spend more time with time. Eventually that could become intimate.

Bottom line is people don't think all that much anymore before saying "I do". Many just thing, "Oh well, if it don't work we can just get a divorce". Marriage doesn't seem as big of a commitment anymore.

Ron
 
It's not your call as to whether or not it has relevance to the thread.

You have posted plenty of irrelevant things in many threads.

yeah yeah yeah, mr sheriff. Nothing is my call, so, nothing is your call either.
So I find the irony in the fact you said that it wasn't my call.
 
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