Why don't friends with kids have time?

Jolie77

Jolie77

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I got this clip of article in an email from a friend of mine and wanted to share it with you guys.

This made me prompt to create a thread about this. A lot of my friends are with children but I do have some few friends that does not have any child/children.

The thing is - I try to make some time for my friends (the ones with no kids) to hang out with them. Surely, it may not be as often as it was before and the problem is, some of my friends has been saying "How come we didn't hang out as much as we did before?". I tell them that I have a whole different priority than what I had before. It changes everything. I also do reassure them that I haven't forgotten about them. The Non-Kids Friends (most of them) are understanding of my situation, especially with a kid that has a special need. There are some few of them that thinks I try to use the kids as an excuse to get away from them when in fact, it isn't the case.

So, I'm calling out to all of you parents on this board - Have you got the same treatment as it was mentioned in the article as well?

Btw - If you can't read the article clearly on this post; I've also attached it for you guys to be able to view it.
 
I would never be like that to a friend with a child, although most of my friends -- less than 1% of them have children. Mainly since I'm going to be 26 this year, so we're still a bit of the younger generation.

But I can tell you in advance about these things, I can think twice before jumping to a conclusion on why my friend does not want to hang out with me if they were to have a child.

Taking care of a child isn't an easy thing. A toddler must be monitored at all times, who knows what he/she will do when left unsupervised. Run off and retrieve a gun, jump in laundry machine, drive a car..

I guess when they reach adolescence the tradeoff is that they can take care of themselves, at the expense of money.

Such is life..
 
So it looks to me like people with out kids are just more kids demanding yet more of our time lol! It never ends! My suggestion to kiddless kiddies, have some kids and you will understand the joy and horrors of it all! :)
 
Being mom is highest priority in her life than being a friend. Becoming mom is huge thing to sacrifice their times and friendship. We had no kids ourselves but we love to go see our friend with kids, help them out with the kids like play, babysitting, etc.
 
I have a full time job and still have to do all the stuff that stay at home mom do so my life can get pretty busy. Almost all of my friends have kids so it hasnt been an issue with me.

I was the first among my friends to have a baby but I dont remember having problems making time for my friends who didnt have kids back then. If they had a problem with my lack of time with them back then, they never told me or I dont remember. :dunno:
 
I don't go out and spend time with friends like I used to. Kids do change your whole lifestyle. I do go out and spend weekends on family outings and spend time with my Family.

I also hold a full time job as well as Hubby does. So we do make time for friends on weekends that we are not doing anything.

Kids are parents first priority.

Some of my friends are kid friendly and some are not. Goes both ways.
 
I have friends who have kids, but they still manage to find time to do things with me or communicate with me.

It doesn't necessarily mean that I need a computer to reply to emails. They have mobile devices that do that.

When is the best time, with kids, to reply to emails? In the bathroom (you're sitting on a toilet, what else is there to do beside poop and pee?)... In bed (15 minutes before you go to bed)... At lunch/dinner (while your kids are eating)... etc.

I have friends who have 2 or 3 kids each and those kids are super-hyperactive freaks! Yet, those friends still managed to find time to talk to me and to play with their Nintendo at the same time.

I guess it's a matter of time management. :dunno:
 
I do have that columnist "Carolyn Hax" in my newspaper. I do read what people's problem is and her advice to them and some are interesting.

I have friends who have kids, and I social with them and interact when the children wants to play around. :)
 
Interesting article, most of my friends have kids so I do socialize with them too even friends without kids as well. :)
 
Being a single mom, that article describes me to the T. I think because of all that going on, I talk w/ God because I have no one else to talk to. My kidless friends are off doing their own thing which is boating and drinking and partying. My ex partys every weekend. I have only been separated from my kids on 2 occassions. That's it. So, in a different post I said I wasn't lonely. Maybe it is cuz I simply don't have time to be lonely?
 
Almost all of my friends have kids. I'm a SAHM. The one friend who doesn't have a kid has treated me like this. I talk to her on the phone but to be truthful when she wants me to go out and party with her I don't want to. I'd rather stay home and cuddle with my girls and watch movies.

I do stay in close contact with my friend, but my idea of fun has changed from hers

My priorities changed and I'm
 
yea i don't go out much that i used to go out a lot when i had no kids. I have two kids now, and i only go out if i need "myself" time. more likely two or three times a month to hang out with friends. sometimes, there are events for everyone then i can bring my kids with me to see my friends there and some of them brings their kids so they can keep kids company. Sometimes its hard for me, every kids' ages are so varies of group. Most of their kids are small kids while my kids are children, not toddlers. We live in a small town. eh.
I really enjoy being a MAMA to my little monkeys. :D I always know that my kids get older and hit their teen years. they will tell me, "shoo shoo i wanna hang out with my friends". I know I will go out with my friends more but I definintely tell kids, " TEXT ME OFTEN!". :giggle:
 
I'm glad most of you can understand this and as we all know, having a kid changes your lifestyle. It changes everything.

It's funny because when I didn't have kids - I was an outgoing person and would go out whenever I wanted to. I would go to different places with friends or just to hang out with them.

Well, I'm still an outgoing person but it's just that I don't do it as much as I did before. Having kids really have changed my perspective to a whole and in a sense, you could say that it has mellowed me down a little.

As for these kidless friends - If they were not to be understanding about how we go through the daily challenges hauling the kids to a T; Then I say, I have nothing to lose because at least they will understand it when they have their own kids some day.
 
Jolie77 said:
I'm glad most of you can understand this and as we all know, having a kid changes your lifestyle. It changes everything.

It's funny because when I didn't have kids - I was an outgoing person and would go out whenever I wanted to. I would go to different places with friends or just to hang out with them.

Well, I'm still an outgoing person but it's just that I don't do it as much as I did before. Having kids really have changed my perspective to a whole and in a sense, you could say that it has mellowed me down a little.

As for these kidless friends - If they were not to be understanding about how we go through the daily challenges hauling the kids to a T; Then I say, I have nothing to lose because at least they will understand it when they have their own kids some day.
Click to expand...

Well not only what you said but also--you're accountable to an individual now. An individual that needs you.
 
VamPyroX said:
I have friends who have kids, but they still manage to find time to do things with me or communicate with me.

It doesn't necessarily mean that I need a computer to reply to emails. They have mobile devices that do that.

When is the best time, with kids, to reply to emails? In the bathroom (you're sitting on a toilet, what else is there to do beside poop and pee?)... In bed (15 minutes before you go to bed)... At lunch/dinner (while your kids are eating)... etc.

I have friends who have 2 or 3 kids each and those kids are super-hyperactive freaks! Yet, those friends still managed to find time to talk to me and to play with their Nintendo at the same time.

I guess it's a matter of time management. :dunno:
Click to expand...

You are kidding, right? When your kids are babies, you don't poo, eat or sleep alone!
 
Many of my friends who do not have kids seem to have trouble understanding why I do stuff with them at the last minute or do things we used to do because it's hard to find a decent and trustworthy babysitter sometimes.
 
I have lost many friends because I cant just get up and go do it - especially that Im a single mom - my girls come first - I try but I cant promise :(

Besides it is no fun to party hard only to suffer through a hangover and fatigue while dealing with kids !I cant just lay in my bed and snooze away if I partied hard the night before! :)
 
deafbajagal said:
Many of my friends who do not have kids seem to have trouble understanding why I do stuff with them at the last minute or do things we used to do because it's hard to find a decent and trustworthy babysitter sometimes.
Click to expand...

I just read my post...I meant to say "don't" not "do."
 
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