Who get the custody of the kids?

Who get the kids?

  • Mom get Full custody of kids (kids live with mom and dad see kids on weekends & summers)

    Votes: 6 33.3%

  • Dad get Full custody of kids (kids live with dad and mom see kids on weekends and summers)

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Mom and Dad share custody (mom and dad share, and see kids every days)

    Votes: 2 11.1%

  • Others??

    Votes: 10 55.6%
  • Total voters
    18
  • Poll closed .
When my ex and I got divorced, we got joint custody of our two daughters. He had first daughter living with him and I had second daughter living with me. That's cuz our 2 daughters didn't get along well. (Now they get along much better and spend time with each other often) Our first daughter lived with him for a year til she went to college. Second daughter lived with me for a few years. My current husband Dave has full custody of his 3 kids because his ex didn't take good care of them. I prefer not to post what his his ex did as not to take good care of them. His kids are very happy living with us full time. They kept telling us they were happy I married their dad. Smile
 
I believed strongly in 50-50, not being selfish. Well, i do seek alots mothers have full custody, but I think its wrong, but unless neither parents not want to do with kids or full custody, that understanding, but their loss. But, if its long distance like 2 hours away, that would be hard to be share but can be voluntery to share each other for kids sake.

Answer ur question (Crazymomma). Most I believe at young kid as 8 mos old, still need BOTH parents to be there to supports, even not together. As my boyfriend's daughter, she was 2 yr old and half, and very depressing to be with father. It been hard on her for awhile, and finally she grow up, and understand whats going on. But very hard when we dropped her off at her mom house, and she always cried and not want to go. But we feel bad and had to do it.
 
SherryCherish said:
i do seek alots mothers have full custody, but I think its wrong
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That's depends on the situation hon, such as if the father abused, not taking good care of children, etc, it could be alot of reason behind it...


When I see a mother who has full custody, I don't question about it because it's none of my business, she has her own reason why, and none of us know what the reason may be....It's not always about being selfish or don't want the father to be around, it may be a good reason out of it....so it's depends...

I am only worry about my children and what I think it's best for my children others can judge me and say I'm doing wrong, but they don't know what going on in my life and why I have the children full time etc...
 
Thanks everyone, that is all I want to hear those feedbacks and experiences, and now I can share with other people I know who are in middle of nasty child custody fight..

The reason, my friend her name is Jane Doe (not going to say her name), she just filed for divorce from her husband John Doe of 8 years... She has 3 kids, 4, 2 and 6 months old baby. The marriage went sour, she caught him cheating with other woman, and she is fighting to keep the kids, and filing for full custody of all the kids. John just recently got a new job and moving to Seattle, Washingtion and Jane lives in West Virginia, and John is trying to get the full custody of the kids too. And he doesn't want to pay child supports..

Now the mother is working for the government and she is VERY great mother and all of the kids are in the day care and she made great money and she had her families live nearby. Now John want to keep the kids and live with him in Seattle, but the mother won't let him to have the kids. The mother is VERY protective of the kids and she said, I can't stand living in my house with no kids for months. The kids are VERY little, and the kids are very attached to the mother which I can tell.

Now the kids are in the middle of the divorce and do you think the kids are better off to live with the mother and her families which they can watch the kids while Mom works or shopping or something. John is the only live is moving to Seattle and have no families lives in Seattle, only just work friends?

What you do??

That is why I just ask for some feedback. Personally, I think the kids are really young, and I think the kids should better off to stay with the mother, until the kids are little older and then they can go to visit their father for long week or something. I think he should pay child support of the kids if they need something like food, clothing, etc... Seattle to West Virginia is PRETTY FAR away...
 
CrazyMomma said:
The reason, my friend her name is Jane Doe (not going to say her name), she just filed for divorce from her husband John Doe of 8 years... She has 3 kids, 4, 2 and 6 months old baby. The marriage went sour, she caught him cheating with other woman, and she is fighting to keep the kids, and filing for full custody of all the kids. John just recently got a new job and moving to Seattle, Washingtion and Jane lives in West Virginia, and John is trying to get the full custody of the kids too. And he doesn't want to pay child supports..
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If the father moved out where the children was living at, then his chance of getting full custody may be slim, and now he moved out of state where the children was living at, and he was faithful during marriage, his case wouldn't be looking any good to be honest....


I wouldn't find this fair if the father has full custody and decide to have the children living with him in a different state and making the mother suffer alot more than what he put her and the children through......After all it's his fault for breaking the family up, because he can't keep his thing in his pants :shaking my head:....


If I was the judge, I would personally give him a visitation, not full custody, and give the mother the full custody cause she still there with the children in the same household, and it proves to me she never left the children behind....and beside it's not fair for the father to take the children and live with him and not being able to see their mother often as they would like, he doesn't relized it going to hurt their children even more, he should be fair in this, if he moves out of state then he lose his right for full custody...if he decide to stay in the same state, then he can fight for shared custody...
 
CrazyMomma said:
Thanks everyone, that is all I want to hear those feedbacks and experiences, and now I can share with other people I know who are in middle of nasty child custody fight..

The reason, my friend her name is Jane Doe (not going to say her name), she just filed for divorce from her husband John Doe of 8 years... She has 3 kids, 4, 2 and 6 months old baby. The marriage went sour, she caught him cheating with other woman, and she is fighting to keep the kids, and filing for full custody of all the kids. John just recently got a new job and moving to Seattle, Washingtion and Jane lives in West Virginia, and John is trying to get the full custody of the kids too. And he doesn't want to pay child supports..

Now the mother is working for the government and she is VERY great mother and all of the kids are in the day care and she made great money and she had her families live nearby. Now John want to keep the kids and live with him in Seattle, but the mother won't let him to have the kids. The mother is VERY protective of the kids and she said, I can't stand living in my house with no kids for months. The kids are VERY little, and the kids are very attached to the mother which I can tell.

Now the kids are in the middle of the divorce and do you think the kids are better off to live with the mother and her families which they can watch the kids while Mom works or shopping or something. John is the only live is moving to Seattle and have no families lives in Seattle, only just work friends?

What you do??

That is why I just ask for some feedback. Personally, I think the kids are really young, and I think the kids should better off to stay with the mother, until the kids are little older and then they can go to visit their father for long week or something. I think he should pay child support of the kids if they need something like food, clothing, etc... Seattle to West Virginia is PRETTY FAR away...
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See *BOLD WORDS*
My answer:
Reason supportive key is family have atternative relatives who living are same in one state.. Who mother's have relatives family living are there reaosn have supportive moral best interst for child(s).
Living far away out of state and have a job and no family out there.. how can supportive atternative there? How provide children needs staying what if person working overtime who will watch child(s) ? Can't be provide quicker wise? That major problem..

Depends on the case which up to the judge..
:dunno: ~ judge can look up your case and condiser what the best interest for your child(s) where will be living with....

Ain't fun..


for myself.. (our kids)
If suppose divorce.. We already agreed 100% share joint custody as long when available... Take their turn.. and willing provide child support and everything without court...
That what we prefer not use COURT.. wasting time! Expense our $$$ gone where provide children needs ?
Lawyer enjoy taking your pocket $ flee away..
ain't worth it..
My hubby and I agreed by notirzation(sp) by paper.. that is it..
We are not going divorce.. and prefer stay marriage forever...
 
:( I know.. Poor those children, they are in the middle of nasty child custody disputes...

I wish I could kick John's ass for screw up the marriage. I thought they were in perfect. Look in the family and marriage, and damn that woman to put the spell on him that drift away from Jane. Poor Jane, she been going thru those shits and she is staying strong for her children's sake, and I HOPE she get the full custody of the kids, and I hope the kids lives with her, and I know the oldest daughter and middle son and baby daughter are Jane's pride and joy and she is SO MUCH in love with them, and want the best for their kids' sake, and the baby is only 6 months old. The oldest is 4 years old and she is very attached to Mom very easily. The middle son is 2 years old, and he is my son's playmate, they play all the time.

I felt bad for Jane, and I can't believe how John did. I hope John can just forget the whole thing and he should have that the kids need their mom badly and their friends and families are around which they can count on them. John's families lives in North Carolina. Jane is STILL breastfeeding the baby, and the boy has little problem (Hyperactive) and the girl wanted to stay with MOM all the time. To me, they are better off to stay and live with Mom.
I know, John want to get full custody of the kids... Jane want to get full custody of the kids too. It's a war for them.

Their divorce is already final... Jane got the house and GMC Envoy and $2,000 Shar Pei (wrinkle dog) and John got the Alavanche truck and he is moving to Seattle, WA by May 15th. The child custody is NOT over yet.

Oh boy.. I can't wait till the court hearing on March 9... The final hearing...
 
i wasnt sure exactly where to post, because my husband and his X share joint custody, but that doesnt mean that they see them every day. it means that he gets the kids one week and the X gets them the next week. of course, she is a greedy bitch and doesnt like this arrangement. well, actually it isnt the arrangement that she doesnt care for, it's the decrease in child support. you see, when she had more custody, she got more financial support, when they both got equal time with the children, she lost that extra money and so she is pissed. however, when she had more legal custody of the children, they were always at our house, she only wanted the money.

I think the courts generally give joint custody these days unless one parent can prove that the other parent is unfit. We could have proven her unfit, but my husband wanted to be FAIR (a term his X is obviously unfamiliar with).
 
:( Poor to those children whose parents are divorces and it's sucks to go visiting Dad or Mom in other weekend and summer. It just sucks NOT to see mom and dad living together anymore.

I was STILL mad about my parents for divorce in 1982 and I was 7 years old, and I decided to let it go and it's their problem, and they were NOT thinking what happening to the children if they are in the middle of the problem or not.
I have always thought I was the problem that got them to divorce, but actually, no. Most kids always thought they were the problem.

When a man loves a woman, and they get married and they have babies, they should stay together, to honest, to cherish and to grow old together..
What's with those people that end up having affair, outgrown of love, not happy, and so on? People with children end up getting divorce and having child custody war are pathetic, they can't even stay honest to each other.

I told my husband and he agree with me. He was a child of divorce parents too, and I was a child of divorce parents. And I have married before, I am sooooo glad I didn't have children with my 1st husband. Whew. And when I met my husband now, and I knew I want to have family with him and I am going to live and grow old with him and watch our children grow up.
 
I was still in high school when my parents divorced, and later on I learn to accept it and move on because life is not always fair and we can't expect everything to go our way, we have to deal with it one way or the other, but the important thing is to let your child know it's never their fault and they shouldn't blame themselves for their parents divorce....
 
I got full custody of my daughter. my daughter's real father has nothing to do with her.. He hasn't seen her in 4 years, he doesn't call or come by. I tried to get him to come see her as often as he could but he just didn't do it. So, I basically have her full time.
 
Ok here is my situation. I have physical custody of my son. My exh and I have share legal custoday. Since my exh have not been involved in this share legal so I ended up doing it everything myself. If he get pissed then I will tell him that he was not involved.

Last few months ago when there is something bothering him and I was considering getting him a cousneler. I told him about it and asking him to join me for the first visit. The next thing I knew that he making excuse for not showing up. :pissed: So from now I do everything myself.

Now that he was planning to move to Florida and I dont want him to til my son is 18 yrs old. Cuz I dont want him to go Florida for the entire summer cuz I would be worry if my exh will do something stupid or illegal.

Sound like I have to go to court and see what they have to say about that. Or go to library. :D I always look up what is my legal rights before I do something stupid. I want to be smart and do the right thing for my son's sake.
 
RebelGirl said:
I got full custody of my daughter. my daughter's real father has nothing to do with her.. He hasn't seen her in 4 years, he doesn't call or come by. I tried to get him to come see her as often as he could but he just didn't do it. So, I basically have her full time.
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Ouchie! sounds almost like my oldest niece who her real father walked out on her life and never saw him. She last saw her real father when she was about 3 or 4 yrs. old. I can't understand few of men that walked out of their children's lives and never saw them.
 
RebelGirl said:
I got full custody of my daughter. my daughter's real father has nothing to do with her.. He hasn't seen her in 4 years, he doesn't call or come by. I tried to get him to come see her as often as he could but he just didn't do it. So, I basically have her full time.
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my thought, u may correct me if I am wrong, that man wasnt married to u he cant try to joint custody :dunno:
and whoever married couple got divorce arranged joint custody but if he hasnt seen daughters/sons mother can change to full custody, right?
 
CrazyMomma said:
:( I know.. Poor those children, they are in the middle of nasty child custody disputes...

I wish I could kick John's ass for screw up the marriage. I thought they were in perfect. Look in the family and marriage, and damn that woman to put the spell on him that drift away from Jane. Poor Jane, she been going thru those shits and she is staying strong for her children's sake, and I HOPE she get the full custody of the kids, and I hope the kids lives with her, and I know the oldest daughter and middle son and baby daughter are Jane's pride and joy and she is SO MUCH in love with them, and want the best for their kids' sake, and the baby is only 6 months old. The oldest is 4 years old and she is very attached to Mom very easily. The middle son is 2 years old, and he is my son's playmate, they play all the time.

I felt bad for Jane, and I can't believe how John did. I hope John can just forget the whole thing and he should have that the kids need their mom badly and their friends and families are around which they can count on them. John's families lives in North Carolina. Jane is STILL breastfeeding the baby, and the boy has little problem (Hyperactive) and the girl wanted to stay with MOM all the time. To me, they are better off to stay and live with Mom.
I know, John want to get full custody of the kids... Jane want to get full custody of the kids too. It's a war for them.
Their divorce is already final... Jane got the house and GMC Envoy and $2,000 Shar Pei (wrinkle dog) and John got the Alavanche truck and he is moving to Seattle, WA by May 15th. The child custody is NOT over yet.

Oh boy.. I can't wait till the court hearing on March 9... The final hearing...
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I'm very sorry to hear about your friend... I know how terrible your friend suffering...

I don't know much about your friend but I would like to ask you question...

You said that you know Jane is good mother of 3 kids but what about John? What kind of father you know him before they spilt up?

I would suggest that Jane and John should sit down to have a good talk like adult because it's their children they should think about, not war over full custody etc... revenage, etc. The children should not feeling being middle between their parents because Jane & John are the parents of their 3 kids.


divorce? It's quickly divorce... :shock:
 
Both of them are great parents...

I think John want the kids, because of the money and tax things... If he works and have the kids, he get more money every years during tax, not the mother... If mother get the kids full time, and she get the money back every year and not John. You know what I mean. I am sure EVERY parents get big money back from federal and states back every year.

The divorce is agreements, they agreed with everything. They have everything. BIG HOUSE with pool, big SUV and expensive dog. The kids are in the middle of the divorce. You know why... The kids are made by vitro-fertization ($2,500 to make a baby by dish). Yea... no kidding...

That is why they were fear of that... Both of them want the money on kids.



Oh well.. March 9 is few more days and I cannot wait to hear what going on and I REALLY REALLY hope Jane get the kids full time.
 
UPDATE!!! UPDATE!!!

The mother won the custody!! :dance2: :applause: The mother get FULL custody of the kids!! She is really happy that her kids is staying here and living with her. The father get visitation, pay child support ($700 dollars each, that is $2,100 a month), and he get to have the kids for 3 weeks in summers and every other holidays (meaning, Mom have the kids this Christmas, and next Christmas, Dad have the kids).

Dad was pissed... Too bad for him.. He is the one who screw up this marriage. He can't keep his pant on or keep his hands off from other woman.

I think the judge did a good job on decision. And I agreed with the judge's decision.
 
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CrazyMomma said:
UPDATE!!! UPDATE!!!

The mother won the custody!! :dance2: :applause: The mother get FULL custody of the kids!! She is really happy that her kids is staying here and living with her. The father get visitation, pay child support ($700 dollars each, that is $2,100 a month), and he get to have the kids for 3 weeks in summers and every other holidays (meaning, Mom have the kids this Christmas, and next Christmas, Dad have the kids).

Dad was pissed... Too bad for him.. He is the one who screw up this marriage. He can't keep his pant on or keep his hands off from other woman. I think the judge did a good job on decision.
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Great to hear that. give her congrats for me..
 
I think it varies on the situation. I've seen mothers who are horrible and fathers who are wonderful. I've also seen fathers who are horrible and mothers who are wonderful. I had a roommate who was fighting for custody of his kids. He had 3 kids with his ex-girlfriend (never married). When they broke up, she sued him for child support. The court forced him to pay a lot of money for child support. He couldn't even keep his tax returns because it went to child support. The 3 kids loved him, but the mother kept making him look bad by lying to the judge. At her house, she only had one mattress for all 3 kids to share. She never bought an oven/stove so she couldn't cook anything for the kids. She squandered all the child support money on parties. How did he find out? His mother would take care of the kids from time to time. One time, they all drew pictures for their dad and his mother mailed them to him. When he got them, he cried because it was the first thing he ever got from his kids in a very long time. Along with the pictures were a note from the mother explaining that the kids were a bit upset that he never said anything about the pictures. Apparently, the kids had been drawing pictures for him for a long time to have them mailed to him. Yet, the mother just took them and threw them all away. The only chance they could do anything for him was when they were without their mother. My roommate tried to have his ex-girlfriend investigated, but the court wouldn't take the accusations into consideration unless he had proof. He couldn't get proof cuz there was a court order keeping him away from his ex-girlfriend. They wouldn't even take the word of his mother because she is his mother... a "biased" issue. :roll: Well, during Spring of 1996... my roommate's tax return was the biggest yet. However, he couldn't keep it. His ex-girlfriend got it. It was HUGE! As soon as she got it, she said... "You can have the kids" and took off. Since the full custody turnover wasn't finalized, the court let her keep all the money.
 
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