What Ticks You Off (Most) About Hearies?

All of their associated behaviours and oppressive responses stemming from Institutional Hearism.
 
When they stand behind a sun that is setting over the horizon to chat with me. LOL!
 
LoveBlue said:
Do you mean "in front" of the sun (the sun is behind them)?
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She meant behind! :Ohno:
 
allright, I'll share some of my stories...

My older sister just walked in my room at my parents home (I was vistiting them, but it's still my room and I like to keep the door closed), I complained but she said that I couldn't hear the knocking even if I'm using hearing aids! (it's fairly easy for me to hear the knocking, my parents do that)

I was baffled, I couldn't say anything to protest or becoming angry. That was the most painful moment for me, to see that I was that helpless to defend myshelf.

My father is really bad at ASL, so it's fun to see his attempts with the crooking fingers and stuff. Let's say that he's an expert to use the middle finger straight out within different signs...

I usually laught by that, it's still funny to see that he'll haven't really managed it fully after several decades with a deaf son!

I wonder if my deafness makes some hearies uncomfortables about their own shortcomings, so it may be more terrifying trying to talk me in the beginning...
 
LoveBlue said:
That's what I was afraid of. That the person had to be on another planet or in another galaxy to be behind the sun...but then, maybe she wishes they were. :giggle:
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Lol...I meant with the sun behind them. :P
 
RedDwarf said:
allright, I'll share some of my stories...

My older sister just walked in my room at my parents home (I was vistiting them, but it's still my room and I like to keep the door closed), I complained but she said that I couldn't hear the knocking even if I'm using hearing aids! (it's fairly easy for me to hear the knocking, my parents do that)

I was baffled, I couldn't say anything to protest or becoming angry. That was the most painful moment for me, to see that I was that helpless to defend myshelf.

My father is really bad at ASL, so it's fun to see his attempts with the crooking fingers and stuff. Let's say that he's an expert to use the middle finger straight out within different signs...

I usually laught by that, it's still funny to see that he'll haven't really managed it fully after several decades with a deaf son!

I wonder if my deafness makes some hearies uncomfortables about their own shortcomings, so it may be more terrifying trying to talk me in the beginning...
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That is very insightful, and I believe that sometimes people do get uncomfortable because they are unsure how to communicate. But the only way to get over that is to approach the deaf person. In my experience, deaf people will go out of their way to make it easy for a hearing person.

To your sister...she has no right to invade your privacy and disrespect your wishes just because she thought you could not hear her knocking.
 
RedDwarf said:
allright, I'll share some of my stories...

My older sister just walked in my room at my parents home (I was vistiting them, but it's still my room and I like to keep the door closed), I complained but she said that I couldn't hear the knocking even if I'm using hearing aids! (it's fairly easy for me to hear the knocking, my parents do that)

I was baffled, I couldn't say anything to protest or becoming angry. That was the most painful moment for me, to see that I was that helpless to defend myshelf.

My father is really bad at ASL, so it's fun to see his attempts with the crooking fingers and stuff. Let's say that he's an expert to use the middle finger straight out within different signs...

I usually laught by that, it's still funny to see that he'll haven't really managed it fully after several decades with a deaf son!

I wonder if my deafness makes some hearies uncomfortables about their own shortcomings, so it may be more terrifying trying to talk me in the beginning...
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jillio said:
That is very insightful, and I believe that sometimes people do get uncomfortable because they are unsure how to communicate. But the only way to get over that is to approach the deaf person. In my experience, deaf people will go out of their way to make it easy for a hearing person.

To your sister...she has no right to invade your privacy and disrespect your wishes just because she thought you could not hear her knocking.
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Just a thought, why not get your parents (or one of them) in same room with your sister or if they are in same room together, ask your parent, "Can I hear when you knock on my door most of time?" If they answer yes, then say to your sister that you can hear knocking and therefore please respect your space by knocking next time.
 
my two cents, or three nickles worth....

I had a friend say something to me the other day that made perfect sense and I wanted to share it. Her daugher is 3 1/2 and has hearing aides. When I asked her what her opininon was about implants (for a paper i'm writing, and YES...I saw the blog about what offends the deaf community ;p)
She put it to me this way.....When ya see someone with glasses, do you freak out and think they're different because they need them to see? Then why does society look at deaf or hard of hearing people like that?
I'm like OMG'osh, i'm so using that in my paper. We have a guy in our ASL class that helps the teacher out. We're always filling him in on what is going on around him because he can't hear and has the right to.
When we don't know the signs, out comes the Rochester method...and our hands get tired!!!! Lifeprint.com has been a real lifesaver for me!!!
Anyhow, anyone who wants to add anything to what i have to say or become friends, i'm under angiec48146 on yahoo messenger.
Me not bad person, not! I good girl. like have friends, yes.
( I think I said that correct, i'm still learning )
Thanks, Happy Easter and have a great day!
Angiee
 
Well, as someone who was a 'hearie' and who is now a 'deafie' I can most definitely understand the frustration factor in trying to communicate with people who can hear. My experiences have been very much like a lot of you here. Becoming deaf has opened up a whole new world of frustration and aggravation from hearing folks. Lets see...

1. I hate how some people will, when you tell them you are deaf, just go, "Oh..." and then turn and walk away. RUDE MUCH!!!!

2. This was a constant source of irritation between me and my hubby for a while...that whole screaming/yelling in my face as if that will improve anything. I am now DEAF...DUH!!! Screaming at me does not make trying to read lips any easier either. (BTW, me hubby is a super sweetie...and is now learning to sign along with me...he has also taken to writing things on a note pad for me sometimes instead of screaming when he tries to sign. LOL)

3. Treating me, (or anyone else), like being deaf equals being stupid. That just really pisses me off.:mad:

4. Ignoring me like I don't exist.

5. Acting like deafness is contagious or something. Deaf people will not make you or your kid deaf. DUH!

6. Not looking at me when you talk. I hated this even when I could hear. It's even more rude when you do it to someone who can't hear.

And I could go on for friggin' hours with this shit. Unfortunately when I was growing up I never met anyone who was deaf. The only awareness I had was a fascination with the life and story of Helen Keller. I read her book many times and it is where I learned the hand alphabet. If I knew then what I know now I would have made a point to have learned to sign back then when I could still hear. As is...I am learning it now but it seems to be slightly harder to remember what I've learned than it used to be. LOL

Just something for all you hearing folks, (and everyone else) to remember...NEVER, EVER take your hearing, sight, mobility, or anything else for granted. It can get taken from you quicker than you can imagine. Like James Dean said, "Plan like you're going to live forever and Live like everyday is your last one."
 
deafbajagal said:
What ticks me off most?

The hearing person (who is fluent in signing)- talking to someone else in my presence without signing. For example, if this person was talking (in ASL) to me...then another person comes up - he will stop signing and start voicing (without signing) to that person.

How rude.

Trust me...that person usually won't do it but one time ;).
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woa woa woa, this completely blind sided me and it is strangely similar to another issue. So if i am assuming the person you are speaking of in this example walking up is hearing and does not know Sign what so ever? So it is rude to not sign while speaking with them briefly? If i am signing with a friend who is HOH or deaf, am i suppose to speak out-loud as well if i have a hearing friend present? Please clear this up for me?
ASL and spoken english is quite different, they are different languages, that would be the same as trying to write in french and at the same time speak in chinese.
 
Thanks for the tips

Being hearing, I appreciate knowing what to do and not to do when interacting with those of the Deaf community.
 
there was nothing there!!! it sounds intresting and i would like to watch it. what is it called?
 
qawaearata said:
woa woa woa, this completely blind sided me and it is strangely similar to another issue. So if i am assuming the person you are speaking of in this example walking up is hearing and does not know Sign what so ever? So it is rude to not sign while speaking with them briefly? If i am signing with a friend who is HOH or deaf, am i suppose to speak out-loud as well if i have a hearing friend present? Please clear this up for me?
ASL and spoken english is quite different, they are different languages, that would be the same as trying to write in french and at the same time speak in chinese.
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In a similar situation we normally all drop into SSE with lipreading, fingerspelling, gesture... Sure, it's slower but it includes everyone. Like if you have a friend who natively speaks German and a friend who natively speaks English, if you all speak French as a second language then that's the best way to include everyone, even though all of you are going to find it more challenging to express yourselves fully and naturally in French.

I guess in many ways it's a matter of correct handling. If someone comes up and wants to speak to me in a different language from the one I am using with the friend I am initially talking to I don't just drop that conversation and start with the third party in French and leave the English speaker standing there like a lampost wondering what is going on. If the French speaker knows no English then I'd ask the English speaker if I can quickly set up a time to chat to the French speaker so they know what I am saying even when they don't understand it, then quickly set up a later date to chat and go back to the first person. With a non-signer it's very similar, you wouldn't expect it to be acceptable with other languages, though it is frequently done to me with friends who break off into Welsh or German when their friends turn up. You have to realise you are doing something rude and make efforts to curtail that rudeness, not just carry on without a care. Worst comes to the worst act as a relay.
 
RoseRodent said:
In a similar situation we normally all drop into SSE with lipreading, fingerspelling, gesture... Sure, it's slower but it includes everyone. Like if you have a friend who natively speaks German and a friend who natively speaks English, if you all speak French as a second language then that's the best way to include everyone, even though all of you are going to find it more challenging to express yourselves fully and naturally in French.

I guess in many ways it's a matter of correct handling. If someone comes up and wants to speak to me in a different language from the one I am using with the friend I am initially talking to I don't just drop that conversation and start with the third party in French and leave the English speaker standing there like a lampost wondering what is going on. If the French speaker knows no English then I'd ask the English speaker if I can quickly set up a time to chat to the French speaker so they know what I am saying even when they don't understand it, then quickly set up a later date to chat and go back to the first person. With a non-signer it's very similar, you wouldn't expect it to be acceptable with other languages, though it is frequently done to me with friends who break off into Welsh or German when their friends turn up. You have to realise you are doing something rude and make efforts to curtail that rudeness, not just carry on without a care. Worst comes to the worst act as a relay.
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well i certainly wouldn't sit there and talk with them if i know the deaf/hoh person was speaking with me, so if i were to just tell them i will talk with them later or to make it quick, letting my friend know it wont be long, then make it fast, is that ok? I hate when im talking and someone just starts another convo while im talking, but i dont usually tend to mind if they tell me to wait briefly.
 
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What ticks me off about hearing people is that my hubby is one of them. He is a pain in the ass..

:lol:
 
qawaearata said:
well i certainly wouldn't sit there and talk with them if i know the dead/hoh person was speaking with me, so if i were to just tell them i will talk with them later or to make it quick, letting my friend know it wont be long, then make it fast, is that ok? I hate when im talking and someone just starts another convo while im talking, but i dont usually tend to mind if they tell me to wait briefly.
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Dead Hoh? :lol:
 
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