@deanne
can i ask you has your hearing gotten worse over time or stayed the same?
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Mine has gotten much worse. I had my last surgery when I was 12 and my hearing stayed stable for about 10 years. Now, not so much. The ENT expects me to become profoundly deaf in that ear within a few years but that's just a guess. My other ear is a mystery. I did learn to speak well with speech therapy and people say my speech is still fine.
I read over one of your other posts yesterday so I have a bit more background. So, for your daughter, from my own experiences -- the main thing to admit and to accept is that her hearing is not 'fine'. Doctors, schools, and my parents looked at my 20-40 loss all through school and said it was 'fine' because I got through. I would have been MUCH better off learning more ASL and being given access to notetakers, etc. Yes, most of the time I managed but with certain teachers, when I was sick, for labs and things where I couldn't watch the teacher, life would have been a lot easier with additional tools. Being hard of hearing and/or Deaf is nothing to be ashamed of and therefore there's no reason for her to try to 'pass' as hearing. I think oftentimes it's the doctors, who say what they think they want the parents to hear. They think the parents want to hear 'oh, it won't affect her much, it's fine, it's not a big deal' but what good parents really want, (and it sounds like you're in this group) is to be told 'these are her options, you should try this, these are the possibilities, this is how to get what she needs).
I hope the tubes will prevent some future ear infections and damage. I was grown by the time I had my last surgeries and I remember the doctor saying he wished I was a few years younger because my body would do a much better job healing and fixing itself.
Just keep at it. Make sure they give you a copy of her audiogram. Try to get copies of the old ones as well. Do what you can around the house to make her life easier. Try the flashing lights as a way to get her attention. Do your best to not get frustrated. I'm a parent of a 4 and 7 year old, so I know how hard it is to get them to listen at ALL hahahahaa. Minimize background noises -- if the TV isn't being watched, turn it off. Perhaps get her some headphones for now so that she isn't blasting the whole house when she watches a cartoon on the computer. If you're telling her something important, make sure she's facing you and ask her if she understands.
I hope some of this will help a bit. Remember that even if her school, doctors, etc sometimes make you feel like you're being pushy and they're unresponsive, you have a whole lot of people behind you.
