What are your thoughts on a hearing person adopting a deaf child?

Holly

Holly

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I have often thought about adopting a deaf child. I am hearing, so I just wanted to get your opinions on it? I plan learning asl and would want my child to be an active part of the deaf communityjj. what are your thoughts?
 
You could... why not?! As long you feel committed to teach him or her ASL and involve with the deaf community therefore there it should be not a problem for you and the deaf child. Yes, you ought to learn ASL well enough before adopting a deaf child.

There were few hearing parents adopting deaf kids before that I heard of. Good luck n pondering about it!
 
I don't know if that is a good idea or not to adopt a deaf child. This is good that you are using the ASL and hopefully that you stay on it so that you can communicate with the deaf child. If not, then you are not looking after the deaf child's need. You don't know what is like to be deaf and many hearing parents tried many times to make the deaf child be hearing and make them speak like them which is very hard to do that. ASL is the most important sign language to help the deaf child understand what is being said and to be able to understand you and other hearing peers. Also having the deaf child be involve in the Deaf communities is a must too whether in schools or outside of the home. Having Deaf friends is a lot better than hearing friends, yeah, a deaf child will choose some friends regardless whether Deaf or Hearing. Pay attention to the deaf child's need when he or she needs something from you. The Deaf communities will probably give your deaf child a lesson on Deaf Culture. That was what I learn from many years ago in the Deaf communities. Just make sure your deaf child is happy with her/his environment. Don't put her/him through the difficult time trying to read lips and be left out much from the hearing peers. Remember ASL is very important in the deaf child's life. I don't want you to become an audist if you think you can make your adopted deaf child go through hell in the mainstream school with lipreading and speaking and no interpreter plus no accomodation to help the deaf child cope with deafness. A deaf child will get mad at you for making the child suffer so much. Being a parent is not easy any way no matter what kind of disabilities or normal the child or children get to behave like spoil brat. Try not to spoil the deaf child too much. The deaf child will probably know the difference between right and wrong. Don't every abuse the deaf child. :hmm:
 
I often considered it when my son was younger, but as a single mom, it just wasn't practical.
 
Yes, hearing parents who learn about ASL and Deaf culture can be good parents of adopted deaf children. I have a Deaf friend who was adopted by hearing parents. They and lots of others in the family learned how to sign and they love him.
 
I see nothing wrong with hearing parents adopting a deaf child. I've seen it happen many times.

I would guess that the deaf child would have a better life since foster parents are more open to the diversity of their foster children and explore many options instead of neglecting their differences.
 
I love to have a deaf child, but man... I can't afford it... :(
 
Some family friends our ours adopted a boy from China who was deaf. They were not able to recieve ASL instruction for the child until the beginning of the school year. I visited him several times a week for the summer and gradually got his Chinese sign language into ASL. I realize that I was not that the best person to assist in this situation as I am not fully fluent in ASL. In the end, the child learned much more sign language than I had expected. As he understood that I (and gradually his parents) understood him via ASL, he began to have a personality and he told me what his life was like in the orphanage. Some are sad and some are happy. It was really cool to see the transition from being misunderstood to being understood in the boy. The parents and there 3 other children where there the whole way. That family is the most selfless family I've ever met. Currently, the boy does 1/2 time in a deaf school and 1/2 time in a regular school.

I understand the reasoning for deaf children to be adopted for deaf parents, but I think a hearing family making an sincere effort is better than an orphanage or temporary foster parents.
 
As long as the adoptive parents teach the kid some form of sign (or at the very least, cued speech. I don't think lipreading is very helpful since it's so tiring and a lot of guess work) so that they have some way of communicating more than 'food', 'drink', etc with them, why not? It's when the parents adopt one and seem to think they can 'fix' it and make them hearing, not allowing them to use sign, etc, that's unfair in my eyes.

Speaking of which, I saw a kid (bout 10?) a while ago. He was probably moderately deaf or something, because he had really expensive top-notch hearing aids. Problem was, he didn't want them in, and his mother hit his hand when he tried to take them out, and told him he has to keep his hearing aids in because otherwise, he "would never be normal" wtf is that teaching him? I was so irritated with it.

I would love to adopt a Deaf child myself, but right now I'm nowhere near ready for that kind commitment to adopt kids. I've got two small children of my own, maybe when they're older I'll think about it.
 
Holly said:
I have often thought about adopting a deaf child. I am hearing, so I just wanted to get your opinions on it? I plan learning asl and would want my child to be an active part of the deaf communityjj. what are your thoughts?
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That would be nice, there is nothing wrong with it, but you should first ask yourself why you want to adopt a deaf kid. You need to be sure you are doing it for the right reasons. If somebody goes for adopting a kid (not a deaf kid, but any kid) and finds a deaf kid she loves along the way its great , but if she searches for a deaf kid, why? She doesnt need to answer it to us. She needs to take a great look at herself and be sure she is not using the situation for avoiding her inner conflicts, or seeing the kid as a project she can work on.

Good Luck
Hermes
 
Hermes said:
That would be nice, there is nothing wrong with it, but you should first ask yourself why you want to adopt a deaf kid. You need to be sure you are doing it for the right reasons. If somebody goes for adopting a kid (not a deaf kid, but any kid) and finds a deaf kid she loves along the way its great , but if she searches for a deaf kid, why? She doesnt need to answer it to us. She needs to take a great look at herself and be sure she is not using the situation for avoiding her inner conflicts, or seeing the kid as a project she can work on.

Good Luck
Hermes
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Not bad. I like what you are saying and that make a lot of sense to think about adopting a child whether normal or having disabilities. Being a parent is no picnic and it can be a headache trying to raise a child whether adopted or biological. Love conquer all the negatives in the child behaviors and just try the best way to show how to teach the child with positive self esteem and make himself or herself a better world for themselves. Nobody is perfect. :cool2:
 
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