Thanksgiving story

Jack

Jack

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I think the best Thanksgiving I ever had was the one where we didn't even have a turkey. Mom and Dad sat us kids down and explained that business hadn't been good at Dad's store, so we couldn't afford a turkey. We had vegetables and bread and pie, and it was just fine. Later I went into Mom and Dad's bedroom to thank them, and I caught them eating a little turkey. I guess that wasn't really the best Thanksgiving.
 
One Thanksgiving my parents did something I don't know if I can ever forgive them for. We were eating our turkey dinner when suddenly I realized I hadn't seen my pet turkey all day. "Where's Mister Gobble?" I asked. Dad seemed confused. "Mister Gobble?" "Yes," I said. "My turkey. The one I picked out at the supermarket, and then after he thawed out I made him do a funny little turkey dance. Mister Gobble." Dad's silence said it all. We were eating Mister Gobble! I ran crying from the table and locked myself in my room. Later, Dad knocked on the door and said he had some dessert for me. When I opened the door, I couldn't believe it. It was a slice of Pumpkie, my pet pie!
 
If you're at a Thanksgiving dinner, but you don't like the stuffing or the cranberry sauce or anything else, just pretend like you're eating it, but instead, put it all in your lap and form it into a big mushy ball. Then, later, when you're out back having cigars with the boys, let out a big fake cough and throw the ball to the ground. Then say, "Boy, these are good cigars!"
 
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