Single and looking.......

[TXgolfer]

Oh, yes I do I am not responding. Put all thier time in being ignorant makes me feel good Like I said before and u said it in the qoute do they get it NO becuse they are SO ignorant.

Ah, but you DID respond........ D'oh

 

[TXgolfer]

oy gamefan4002, I know someone for you.. hit her up @ paloma112@yahoo.com



disclaimer: I cannot be held responsible between the two of you, but she is from NIGERIA and loves to talk online. HINT HINT.

Dunno......she sounds ALMOST to good to be true......

 

[paperclip]

Wish you lots of luck finding truly independent woman, cause independent woman would want to remain independent.

I am not trying to derail the topic here, but can you elaborate on this a little?

 

[arafangion]

Hilarious.

 

[sequoias]

Wirelessly posted

Gamefan, have you had your pubic hair growing yet? GO to bar or nightclubs to find a lady is much better than finding a gal via ONLINE.

I disagree. It depends where you look.

 

[sequoias]

Wirelessly posted

Also, gamefan..start looking at www.whatever.com and let me know how it went. This isn't a place to find women unless you get to know people here.

 

[naisho]

I am not trying to derail the topic here, but can you elaborate on this a little?

I think dhb is trying to say, a woman who wants to be truly independent wouldn't want to be in a relationship.

Also, gamefan..start looking at www.whatever.com and let me know how it went. This isn't a place to find women unless you get to know people here.

I looked at www.whatever.com to see what it was..
His OP (first post) says a bit about him. Don't get why people come here thinking they can fish for dates right off the bat.

 

[Jiro]

I am not trying to derail the topic here, but can you elaborate on this a little?

naisho's correct. Independent woman tends to be "feminist" and does not adhere to the traditional way of life where men are the money-makers in the house. That's one. Another is Sex and the City type where the women are working & independent type who can date around for fun because they don't like being hitched. They feel empowered as much as men because they don't need to depend on men for everything and they're usually the one who don't want kids.

 

[paperclip]

naisho's correct. Independent woman tends to be "feminist" and does not adhere to the traditional way of life where men are the money-makers in the house. That's one. Another is Sex and the City type where the women are working & independent type who can date around for fun because they don't like being hitched. They feel empowered as much as men because they don't need to depend on men for everything and they're usually the one who don't want kids.

But doesn't a woman need to be independent to some extent, regardless of where she what kind of life path she wants?

In otherwords, I don't trust a whole lot of men. I think it is sweet when guys open doors and watch their language and such. A part of me wants to live in that kind of respect long-term. However, I feel expected to continue school even though I know I would be fully content being a stay-at-home mom. Thus, I am responsible for myself until I am with someone I trust. On the flip side, being independent creates a (false?) distance.

I am not sure how to explain what I'm thinking. I have to be independent, but the lifestyle that I want to pursue involves being dependent on a man. (Not dependent in an irresponsible way, but in a mutual dependence).

Does anyone else see the oxymoron?

 

[Jiro]

But doesn't a woman need to be independent to some extent, regardless of where she what kind of life path she wants?

In otherwords, I don't trust a whole lot of men. I think it is sweet when guys open doors and watch their language and such. A part of me wants to live in that kind of respect long-term. However, I feel expected to continue school even though I know I would be fully content being a stay-at-home mom. Thus, I am responsible for myself until I am with someone I trust. On the flip side, being independent creates a (false?) distance.

I am not sure how to explain what I'm thinking. I have to be independent, but the lifestyle that I want to pursue involves being dependent on a man. (Not dependent in an irresponsible way, but in a mutual dependence).

Does anyone else see the oxymoron?

there you go - the mutual dependence. As long as both man and woman in relationship do their role as defined by birth of humanity... we're ok. It is fine for women to pursue whatever they want but it's the whole attitude behind it. it creates confusion and dysfunction. That is not good for children and society.

It is fine with me if my wife wants to have a job but it is not fine to me if it interferes with motherly duty. Entrusting my own kid to nanny? absurd!

 

[paperclip]

there you go - the mutual dependence. As long as both man and woman in relationship do their role as defined by birth of humanity... we're ok. It is fine for women to pursue whatever they want but it's the whole attitude behind it. it creates confusion and dysfunction. That is not good for children and society.

It is fine with me if my wife wants to have a job but it is not fine to me if it interferes with motherly duty. Entrusting my own kid to nanny? absurd!

I was going to take this to pm, but I want other people to contribute if they want to get involved with derailing this thread (sorry).

Jiro, can you clarify?

So are you saying that society (and feminist attitudes) have confused women, causing them to ignore their role as a mother?

Are we sending the message to children that the mom is worth more working than actually performing the roles of a mother?

I'm just trying to understand the "attitude that caused confusion.”
And how does an independent woman pursue (or allow herself to be pursued)to be in a (mutually) dependent relationship?

A few weeks ago, I was joking that I was just going to get a sperm donor in a few years, but some people actually do it.

Regardless of the fact that I can't lift as much as you or I'd prefer a guy to jumpstart a car, it seems like relationships not longer have a mutual dependence financially, but the dependence is emotional and based on tradition. Does this make a marriage weaker knowing that the woman could leave and still be financially stable on her own?

 

[shel90]

there you go - the mutual dependence. As long as both man and woman in relationship do their role as defined by birth of humanity... we're ok. It is fine for women to pursue whatever they want but it's the whole attitude behind it. it creates confusion and dysfunction. That is not good for children and society.

It is fine with me if my wife wants to have a job but it is not fine to me if it interferes with motherly duty. Entrusting my own kid to nanny? absurd!

Either you get a job that pays well enough to support the whole family or become Mr. Mom. Pls dont put all the burden on the woman for child care duties. Fathers are just as much as responsible. This is not the 1950s anymore.

 

[Jiro]

Either you get a job that pays well enough to support the whole family or become Mr. Mom. Pls dont put all the burden on the woman for child care duties. Fathers are just as much as responsible. This is not the 1950s anymore.

guess that's why divorce rate is skyrocketing and more families are becoming dysfunctional.

so like I said before - It's ok for both parents to have jobs while kids are at day school but it is not ok to me when kids spend just couple hours a day with parents. Yes I understand the harsh reality going on here but it's not right.

How did this changed from 1950's? It's sad.

 

[paperclip]

How did this changed from 1950's? It's sad.

We "need" more stuff? Thus a higher income???

 

[Jiro]

I was going to take this to pm, but I want other people to contribute if they want to get involved with derailing this thread (sorry).

Jiro, can you clarify?

So are you saying that society (and feminist attitudes) have confused women, causing them to ignore their role as a mother?

Are we sending the message to children that the mom is worth more working than actually performing the roles of a mother?

I'm just trying to understand the "attitude that caused confusion.”
And how does an independent woman pursue (or allow herself to be pursued)to be in a (mutually) dependent relationship?

A few weeks ago, I was joking that I was just going to get a sperm donor in a few years, but some people actually do it.

Regardless of the fact that I can't lift as much as you or I'd prefer a guy to jumpstart a car, it seems like relationships not longer have a mutual dependence financially, but the dependence is emotional and based on tradition. Does this make a marriage weaker knowing that the woman could leave and still be financially stable on her own?

what's happening here is lack of communication and competence. Fathers are not doing their duty and mothers are not doing theirs either. Every man and woman should be capable of doing pretty much anything themselves. If not - they can help each other.

What's even more important especially in family is the mutual dependence where there is a good communication between each other. It creates stability and stable environment for all.

 

[Jiro]

We "need" more stuff? Thus a higher income???

no. just more good people with good principle.

 

[shel90]

guess that's why divorce rate is skyrocketing and more families are becoming dysfunctional.

so like I said before - It's ok for both parents to have jobs while kids are at day school but it is not ok to me when kids spend just couple hours a day with parents. Yes I understand the harsh reality going on here but it's not right.

How did this changed from 1950's? It's sad.

Many women in the 1950s made statements on how unhappy they were being housewives.

If the man doesnt want his children with a nanny but his wife wants to work, why can the man stay home with the kids? Why does the burden have to fall on the women only?

Many jobs these days do not support a whole family nowadays, anyway.

 

[paperclip]

what's happening here is lack of communication and competence. Fathers are not doing their duty and mothers are not doing theirs either. Every man and woman should be capable of doing pretty much anything themselves. If not - they can help each other.

What's even more important especially in family is the mutual dependence where there is a good communication between each other. It creates stability and stable environment for all.

Jiro - If a woman doesn't meet a guy who is competent, would you argue that it would be acceptable that she start a family alone (without a father figure) rather being in a dysfunctional relationship?

Shel - woman and men both play dual parts?? Work and home. Whereas in the past, women only had one (important) part at home? Thus work (in a sense, multi-tasking) gives women a higher sense of worth?

 

[Jiro]

Many women in the 1950s made statements on how unhappy they were being housewives.

If the man doesnt want his children with a nanny but his wife wants to work, why can the man stay home with the kids? Why does the burden have to fall on the women only?

Many jobs these days do not support a whole family nowadays, anyway.

you're not getting it. I certainly don't want the whole stay-at-home mom thing because it's pretty cruel to keep the housewife slaving away at home all day for rest of her life.

I said it's ok for both parents to work. it's ok for both parents especially mother to pursue whatever they want but it is not ok for mother to neglect her motherly duty. Same for father. It's not ok for father to neglect fatherly duty. This is where family community comes in. The grandparents and/or community can help out to take care of the kids. All "primitive" societies do this. It works for thousand of years.

Simply put - if both parents want to have a family - then they need to act like parents. If raising family is financially difficult - then don't raise a family because it's cruel to put one's family thru financial difficulty for long time.

I say same for wealthy parents. They don't actually raise the kids but their nanny does and they don't teach their kids but they hire people to do that. How awful.

life sucks, doesn't it?

 

[Jiro]

Jiro - If a woman doesn't meet a guy who is competent, would you argue that it would be acceptable that she start a family alone (without a father figure) rather being in a dysfunctional relationship?

if she can do that - that's fine with me. It would be nice to have a fatherly figure in child's life but.... we gotta make do, right? Dysfunctional? not that bad but it's certainly much better than raising a family with a bum who does nothing all day and drink... leeching away like a disease.