Hi Rick, welcome to All Deaf. I applaud you for wanting to learn ASL to better communicate with your boyfriend.
I too am gay and hearing like yourself and started dating a wonderful Deaf man back in January. I started taking ASL classes in March and have since tried to get more involved with the Deaf community. Immersion seems to be a key to learning, like trying to learn any language other than your own.
I have also recently found a very great site, mentioned to me by others called lifeprint.com. I can’t tell you enough what a great site this is. Classes are great and so is this site. You have to take a multi-pronged approach to learning the language and try to get involved with local Deaf clubs or events if they have any. I’m sure with a city your size they must.
I went to the Deaf Club in Pittsburgh this week for my first time and I can already see I will be able to benefit from regularly attending.
As for wanting a gay teacher, I don’t see any need for this. There is nothing my boyfriend has taught me that I would have not gotten from any teacher, and your boyfriend is always going to teach you signs you won’t learn in class anyway due to different dialects. My boyfriend is from down South and already I have learned signs from him that are not native to this region and vice versa.
I also must say I am a bit surprised by how rude some of the people on this post have been to you. You are here to learn and are asking for help and shame on them for their comments, especially since you are reaching out to learn and asking for help. While some people are not interested in why you want to learn, that is fine, but many of us are and it is good to know your decision for learning ASL. If they don’t want to know, then they should just ignore your reason and move on, not post a nasty comment back to you.
I hope your path is a pleasant journey and wish you the best of luck. We are on the same journey, I just happened to start 6 months ago. J
-David