Mom of deaf son seeking help from the deaf community

It would be better for your son to have a Deaf program whether in the mainstream schools or Deaf schools. Back in the 50s and 60s, I had trouble trying to understand in an oral public schools and I was not allowed to sign the sign language. I was in a small deaf classroom and trying to communicate with each other in oral which is difficult enough. We, deafies, want to learn sign langauge very much. I tried to protest to the principal in high school to have a teacher teach us sign language and to use sign language freely among us, Deafies. But the principal did not want us to learn sign language and think that sign language is bad. We had a very hard time in the mainstream school without a Deaf program or no sign language at all. We miss out a lot. The thing is that many hearing people do not understand nothing about what is like to be deaf (no sound and not be able to pick up the words, even with hearing aids or CIs (Cochlear Implant). Most hearing people want us to be like them and think that hearing aids and CIs would make them hear perfectly with no problem. That is not true at all. That is why we tried to teach hearing people to understand that our hearing loss or deafness is not going to be cure ever. So best is to find a school where there is a Deaf program for your son instead of going oral school. I do hope I make myself clear to you on why we are advocating helping our deaf children. :)
 
I also hope that you guys along with his sibilings would learn ASL. My own family didn't learn sign language and I strongly believe that things would be a lot better for me if my family had learned. Back then, the educators for the deaf believed in oral-only education.
 
Buffalo said:
I also hope that you guys along with his sibilings would learn ASL. My own family didn't learn sign language and I strongly believe that things would be a lot better for me if my family had learned. Back then, the educators for the deaf believed in oral-only education.
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I concur..4 years ago, when my hearing 21 year old brother was considering taking ASL to meet his foriegn language requirements for colledge, my deaf brother and I became so excited thinking he would become fluent in ASL and finally we would have someone in the family who could communicate with us without struggling. Well, he changed his mind..we were so disappointed and let down big time. Oh well.
 
Continuing my earlier post....

I would encourage the OP to also visit the local school with her son. Visit the classrooms and ask as many questions as possible. Find out exactly how they teach the Deaf students. Ask them how many hours they will spend with hearing students and how many hours they will spend in the Deaf Ed room. Ask how soon the school teaches keyboarding school - because you want your son to be able to call 911 whenever there's an emergency. I know at the local school here, they won't teach the Deaf kids keyboarding skills until they reach high school age!

See if the residential school has any summer programs which either just your son can participate in or the entire family. Try to visit the residential school. Also ask the residential school as many questions as possible.

I saw that the OP is learning ASL via a deaf mentor. Awesome!! Keep up the good work. Find out if the local school really does teach ASL. I know my local school here claims to be teaching ASL, but in reality many of the interpreters are still using SEE.

The OP is being proactive at this point. I would strongly encourage the OP to continue to be proactive in her son's education. Do not simply accept answers which are given, but actively investigate the claims which are made.

As to the age in which to send the child to residential school. I've met several Deaf people who started residential school as early as four-years old. I asked them if they thought they had started too early and they were unanimous that it was a very wise decision on their parents' part.

I wish the OP all the best in her endeavors with her Deaf son!
 
Daft said:
Continuing my earlier post....

I would encourage the OP to also visit the local school with her son. Visit the classrooms and ask as many questions as possible. Find out exactly how they teach the Deaf students. Ask them how many hours they will spend with hearing students and how many hours they will spend in the Deaf Ed room. Ask how soon the school teaches keyboarding school - because you want your son to be able to call 911 whenever there's an emergency. I know at the local school here, they won't teach the Deaf kids keyboarding skills until they reach high school age!

See if the residential school has any summer programs which either just your son can participate in or the entire family. Try to visit the residential school. Also ask the residential school as many questions as possible.

I saw that the OP is learning ASL via a deaf mentor. Awesome!! Keep up the good work. Find out if the local school really does teach ASL. I know my local school here claims to be teaching ASL, but in reality many of the interpreters are still using SEE.

The OP is being proactive at this point. I would strongly encourage the OP to continue to be proactive in her son's education. Do not simply accept answers which are given, but actively investigate the claims which are made.

As to the age in which to send the child to residential school. I've met several Deaf people who started residential school as early as four-years old. I asked them if they thought they had started too early and they were unanimous that it was a very wise decision on their parents' part.

I wish the OP all the best in her endeavors with her Deaf son!
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:gpost:
 
:welcome: to Alldeaf. I live in Ontario too. I have a friend who goes to an Ontarian deaf school and she loves it. It is your decision, and I am sure that whatever decision you make will be in the best interest of your son. :)
 
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Bebonang said:
It would be better for your son to have a Deaf program whether in the mainstream schools or Deaf schools. Back in the 50s and 60s, I had trouble trying to understand in an oral public schools and I was not allowed to sign the sign language. I was in a small deaf classroom and trying to communicate with each other in oral which is difficult enough. We, deafies, want to learn sign langauge very much. I tried to protest to the principal in high school to have a teacher teach us sign language and to use sign language freely among us, Deafies. But the principal did not want us to learn sign language and think that sign language is bad. We had a very hard time in the mainstream school without a Deaf program or no sign language at all. We miss out a lot. The thing is that many hearing people do not understand nothing about what is like to be deaf (no sound and not be able to pick up the words, even with hearing aids or CIs (Cochlear Implant). Most hearing people want us to be like them and think that hearing aids and CIs would make them hear perfectly with no problem. That is not true at all. That is why we tried to teach hearing people to understand that our hearing loss or deafness is not going to be cure ever. So best is to find a school where there is a Deaf program for your son instead of going oral school. I do hope I make myself clear to you on why we are advocating helping our deaf children. :)
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I came on this site because what I have heard and read about the deaf community is that you are their for each other I want to learn to be the best advocate for my son, aside from my deaf mentor all of my sons workers are hearing and me and my husband didn't feel that they could answer our questions and help make these important decisions in the best interest of him. We want him to be the best he can and I was so excited that I found this site, I have had questions answered and also been given thoughts to questions I never thought to ask, so thank you all again.
 
Glad you are happy and found this site helpful! Hope you do come back and visit us. :)
 
If you ever need local help from anyone including us few deafies in ontario don't hesitate! Didn't realise you were in ontario! Anyways good luck with your son!
 
If I remember rightly Ontario is home of the Lion's Club that is heavily involved with Deaf people, including events, support, etc.
 
Is your son currently in Infants Hearing Program (IHP)?
 
Just because the local school has a formal Deaf education program doesn't neccessarily mean its a good program. Contact parents of current and/or past students and members of the local Deaf community and find out their opinions. And find out how mainstreamed the Deaf students really are. I know of one school which is "mainstreamed" but the Deaf students only spend a few hours a day with hearing students.
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All good points!!!!!
Hopefully the Deaf program is decent. One thing to ask about is the quality of the early intervention/early grades, as well as the kids who have been in the program for their entire academic career. Sometimes a Dhh program may appear to produce not very well educated kids, when in fact the low acheivement is due to kids who were mainstreamed to the max, and weren't in dhh ed from the very beginning.
Also, re: waiting til high school for res school. I do know that decisions about educational placement can change drasticly as the kid's needs changes.
I don't think little kids should go off to res school, but I do think third-fourth graders can handle it. Remember, res schools usually send their students home every weekend.
But yeah, that's good that you're openminded about maybe a res school placement for high school.....Just keep your options open and see where the educational path leads you. I do know of kids who started out in formal dhh programs and then switched to res school for high school.
 
shel90 said:
I can read lips and speak pretty well so on an one-one-one basis, I do pretty good with communicating with hearing people so that was how I communciated with my family. However, if there was a family gathering or large social groups (very common when I was in middle school and high school) I was always completely left out because I couldnt keep up with what everyone was saying. That lead to the feelings of isolation. I would be in a group pretending that I was understanding what everyone was saying so whenever everyone laughed, I laughed not knowing what was funny. It was the most loneliest feeling ever.

My brother is also deaf with no speech skills and everyone in the family depended on me to interpret for him and for them to facilitate communciation when I was growing up. I thought it was my job to do that and I was always happy to do it cuz I loved my brother and I was the only one he could communicate with.

Now, he and I are very very close because I finally learned ASL at the age of 25 and I finally realized that my family really do not know who my brother is because nobody has learned sign language for him. It is just "Hi" "How are you" "Good"...that's it.
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same with me. I wanted to add that being a noisy areas made it difficult to carry on a one-in-one conversation especially when I met a new person. Because I was trained to use my hearing aids with speech reading/lip reading

It always have to be in a quiet place, and one person at a time. At least with ASL, you don't have to worry about that.
 
I wanted to add that being a noisy areas made it difficult to carry on a one-in-one conversation especially when I met a new person. Because I was trained to use my hearing aids with speech reading/lip reading

It always have to be in a quiet place, and one person at a time. At least with ASL, you don't have to worry about that.
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YES!!!! Not to get into a debate about methodology (those of you who know me know very well I'm pro full toolbox) but this if for for the lurkers out there. Being able to hear and speak is an excellent tool, but it's not perfect for all situions. Even most oral sucesses can only do well one on one. Many of us have great difficulty in listening situtions that aren't "perfect"
Which is why we need more tools then just hearing and speaking!
 
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