If you ever worked, are you still working or living on disability?

[AngelEyes1]

I worked from the time I was 16 until 33, currently unemployed. I quit my recent job after being with them for a lenghty period of time due to various issues how I was being treated there and other things. It was similar to h.s., everyone had their own cliques while I was an outcast. I couldn't fit in the workplace no matter how hard I tried, it was like that at every job I had. I'm HoH, hearing better in my left ear than right ear with BTE hearing aids.
My parents wanted me to have that "normal" life getting a job and such but living to their standards wasn't working out for me.

 

[dereksbicycles]

Well, why not start your own business?

I'm in same boat here. You see, my girlfriend would point----look, this guy works at a Walmart. Why cannot you be an adult and get a real job like him? Well, they don't buy low and sell high like I do, so there you go.

IMO, it's really not worth it to have a job and have no benefit. That is exactly what my girlfriend does and I wonder why she is doing that.

 

[FadedRose]

Angel eyes I work full time and I know just what that feeling is like. I still plan to work as long as my sanity remains intact. I enjoy working, it gives me something to do but I do not like the people I work with ( some but not all ). I too am an outcast where I'm at. No one ever involves me in conversation except maybe one or two people. For 9 hours I work in silence by myself while everyone else just chatters away and I wish I could join in and be apart of the group but when I've tried it seems like I'm the conversation killer. Everyone goes quiet. I'm treated sometimes as if I'm mentally challenged-spoken to as if I were and sometimes I'm outright ignored. My managers are not like this at all. I have a great boss, several actually that treat me with respect and talk to me on their level. There are a few doctors who do the same and when I work with them it's not such a bad day but when the "clique" shows up for a shift it's a horrible day. I've been there for 12 years, started when I was 17 working part time then progressed to full time after I married. Disability isn't an option at least not where my Deafness is concerned. I do have an autoimmune disease that may prevent me from working in the future but I'm going to hold on as long as I can. Looking for another job is out of the question. I get paid well considering I've been there for years and I don't think any other place would be willing to accomodate me as well as this place has for my medical illness. I often worry about getting fired because there are just some days I simply cannot work because of the illness and if that happens I'll just have to go from there.

As for bringing any of this up with my boss(s) I believe they know already and it's why they treat me as well as they do. I always tell myself-it's just a job, go there do it, go home. It doesn't always work that way. A few have tried to befriend me but my past experience when someone has tried to befriend me ( when I was a teenager ) it was for other reasons-mainly to get scoop on me to make fun of me about and there is nothing there. I'm just an average woman with a hearing loss who wonders why people treat her the way they do.

If it weren't for Alldeaf I think I would have lost it by now!

 

[VacationGuy234]

I was just trying to explain this to a friend the other day. It's hard for hearing people to understand what it's like to be deaf, our lives are so much different than the life of a hearing person. We don't get into cliques because there are not enough of us to make up one, usually it's just one of us at any given job.

I like to quote the character Frodo from the Lord of the Rings movies when the character states to Galadriel(another character), "I cannot do this alone." She answers, "You are a Ring-bearer, Frodo. To bear a Ring of Power is to be alone. This task was appointed to you. And if you do not find a way no one else will."

In a larger sense, you are not alone as there are many of us, but, on a small scale, to be deaf is to be alone. And, I've come to understand, there is both good and bad to this. I'm never going to have the life of a hearing person. Sometimes, it takes daily effort to accept this. We face more difficulties, but because of it we become stronger, smarter, more adaptable, I think these are good qualities to obtain.

My boss often tells me, you're like a guy on an island by himself. When he says this I think to myself, "You've no idea".

I don't know what getting disability is like as I've never had it, but I make more at my job than I would on disability. At the moment, this is a better solution for me.

I agree with Derek, you should look to starting your own business or finding a job where you don't need as much communication. Things at work for us are never going to be as they are for hearing people.

 

[shel90]

Which do u prefer...live on ssdi and be broke or have a job that pays more? What about looking at your coworkers as just people u work with, nothing more but have friends outside of work to feel like a part of a group? I used to be close with several of my coworkers but too many problems so I just treat them like coworkers instead of friends and it has been less drama for me at work. Anyways, work is really not the place for socializing and I have gotten more work done since then.

 

[Lau2046]

I've never belonged to cliques unless I can count my family as such. I've gone through a number of jobs that damn near killed me stress wise and paid very little. As such, I still live with my parents and pay them rent, naturally. I earn the least in my family despite having completed graduate level education. Once I've paid my bills, there's nothing left over. Yet I continue to work because I owe it to my parents (and myself) to do so. They helped me financially and emotionally all these years and I don't have the luxury of quitting just because things are difficult and contributing nothing to their expenses.

I don't feel right about giving up and living off the state via disability or welfare, although God knows I thought about it when I worked with one horrible agency for five long years. I hated that job so much I contemplated trying to lie or bribe my way into the military no matter what it took, even taking off for Iraq. Fortunately, I did manage to get out and found a position with another agency that really treated me better and I made friends there too. I'm sure hearing loss at your level makes work places all the harder, but it doesn't make life easy for those like me with hearing loss and a learning disability. When we don't get things right away, people assume we're idiots so there's a lot of stress with regard to asking for help or saying nothing and struggling silently....at times it doesn't seem worth it.

In many ways, I face the uncertainties of each day arming myself with my faith and my own secret weapon, borrowing from an inspiration of mine, Golda Meir, that I have no alternative. I apply her gutsy attitude to persevering, "To be or not to be is not a question of compromise. Either you be or you don't be." So I get up each day and face it as well as I can because that’s what strong people do.


The vocational departments exist for a reason, and perhaps you can sit down with them and discuss a career path? It sounds like you need to discuss job options with someone, maybe at your former school? There is help out there if you're willing to push forward. You shouldn’t have to hate your job and they could help point you in the right direction to find job satisfaction somewhere.

Laura

 

[VacationGuy234]

Well, why not start your own business?

I'm in same boat here. You see, my girlfriend would point----look, this guy works at a Walmart. Why cannot you be an adult and get a real job like him? Well, they don't buy low and sell high like I do, so there you go.

IMO, it's really not worth it to have a job and have no benefit. That is exactly what my girlfriend does and I wonder why she is doing that.

Are you saying you make more than your girlfriend and are supporting her? If that this the case, I can't understand her argument.

 

[shel90]

When I was younger, I worked for a major insurance company and I had the same issues..felt like an outcast, excluded from conversations, coworkers stopping their conversations as soon I tried to join them, and so forth. By being young (I was 20 to 23 when I worked there), I took it personally and became depressed. Now, being older and having experienced a workplace full of people who use ASL and then becoming close friends with several of them, it became more of a headache because there was gossip, the temptation to socialize instead of actually working, lines between friendships and professionalism being crossed, and etc, I have learned that it is better not to socialize with coworkers too much and focus on the job more on them to minimize any workplace drama. I just go to work and do the job I am supposed to do and go home. I save the socializing for my family and friends outside of work.

At the end, having a job and working is better than living off on SSDI or SSI for me. I know some people have a hard time finding jobs or are unable to work and have to live on SSD or SSI and I don't condemn them for it. I know I can work so no excuse for me. If I stop working, it will be because of medical issues or a crisis in my life that needs to be taken care of not because of feeling like an outcast with my coworkers. That's just me.

 

[ambrosia]

The vocational departments exist for a reason, and perhaps you can sit down with them and discuss a career path? It sounds like you need to discuss job options with someone, maybe at your former school? There is help out there if you're willing to push forward. You shouldn’t have to hate your job and they could help point you in the right direction to find job satisfaction somewhere.

Laura

This is great advice. I have no idea what your degree of hearing loss is, but I'm sure you guys can figure something out. I went through them, but I had already figured out what I wanted to do, they ended up not helping with school because I got a grant but they did get me a new hearing aid, but I didn't actually get it until I was almost done with school. I'm a massage therapist. I'm pretty much on my own all day, just me and my client in a room, and I tell them before hand that I'm hoh and when they're face down on the table I won't understand anything they say, I also say "most people don't want to chat". Actually a lot of people do, other therapist gripe about it all the time, but if I tell them they other people don't i think it's a big hint that they shouldn't lol so they don't. The only time I'm with other coworkers is on my breaks. That's the kind of job you need to look for, one where you're basically on your own all day. I suppose it's kind of lonely but if you find something you like doing and get satisfaction from you still get a feeling of fulfillment and accomplishment. That feeling of accomplishment shouldn't be underrated, and feeling independent, being able to take of yourself instead of relying on others is good for the soul I think.

 

[dereksbicycles]

Are you saying you make more than your girlfriend and are supporting her? If that this the case, I can't understand her argument.

I really don't make that much. Not really enough to have a house and a family unless I find new ways to market what I do.

 

[FadedRose]

I've never belonged to cliques unless I can count my family as such. I've gone through a number of jobs that damn near killed me stress wise and paid very little. As such, I still live with my parents and pay them rent, naturally. I earn the least in my family despite having completed graduate level education. Once I've paid my bills, there's nothing left over. Yet I continue to work because I owe it to my parents (and myself) to do so. They helped me financially and emotionally all these years and I don't have the luxury of quitting just because things are difficult and contributing nothing to their expenses.

I don't feel right about giving up and living off the state via disability or welfare, although God knows I thought about it when I worked with one horrible agency for five long years. I hated that job so much I contemplated trying to lie or bribe my way into the military no matter what it took, even taking off for Iraq. Fortunately, I did manage to get out and found a position with another agency that really treated me better and I made friends there too. I'm sure hearing loss at your level makes work places all the harder, but it doesn't make life easy for those like me with hearing loss and [/B]a learning disability. When we don't get things right away, people assume we're idiots so there's a lot of stress with regard to asking for help or saying nothing and struggling silently....at times it doesn't seem worth it.

In many ways, I face the uncertainties of each day arming myself with my faith and my own secret weapon, borrowing from an inspiration of mine, Golda Meir, that I have no alternative. I apply her gutsy attitude to persevering, "To be or not to be is not a question of compromise. Either you be or you don't be." So I get up each day and face it as well as I can because that’s what strong people do.


The vocational departments exist for a reason, and perhaps you can sit down with them and discuss a career path? It sounds like you need to discuss job options with someone, maybe at your former school? There is help out there if you're willing to push forward. You shouldn’t have to hate your job and they could help point you in the right direction to find job satisfaction somewhere.

Laura

I have Dyscalculia. I do not have any difficulty learning math I just cannot do it in my head. I also will write numbers backwards. Example a 6 will be a 9 and so forth. It's weird to explain. I just have to double check that I'm seeing the numbers the correct way, much like proof reading a paper over and over for errors or mistakes. I must use a calculator at all times because of it. Embarrassing to admit. Oddly, I write music and excel in all other areas academically. I believe the correct term is twice exceptional-academically gifted with a learning disability on top of it. I'm glad to see that you obtained a graduate despite yours. It's inspiring and makes me want to push myself finally to get that PhD in Psychology I've been holding off on for fear I'll be a failure because of it. for sharing!

 

[DeafBadger]

I've had the same problems in the workplace, including workplace bullying.

It's like being blindsided in a car crash all of a sudden. You don't know where it came from, but it hurts!

One doesn't know where it came from, because the news of its coming was "on the wind" (verbal gossip, probably). Everyone else (hearing) but you knew it was coming.

It sucks bad, I know.

My philosophy with work is that it is to pay the bills and to save money for my retirement (even "early retirement" if it is technically possible).

In my view (and my strategy), that is just a matter of reducing your expenses and lifestyle expectations to a level that can be covered by the income from your investments.

I'm investing in one fund, VTSAX with Vanguard.

I'm using the techniques in "The Fourth Mega-Market," by Acampora, to use charting indicators to decide when to get out and in this one fund. (Sure, he didn't predict the crash, but his technical indicators in the book would have kept you out of it... and back in at the right time.)

It would have kept me out of the 2008 stock market crash, and back in the market in mid-late 2009 when the market started going back up. That's good enough for me, if it works.

And even if it didn't, dollar-cost averaging with that fund would work well enough over time.

The point I'm making is that I'm trying to get into work that can pay enough for me to dump money into this fund.

And get to the point where, technically, I don't have to work to pay my bills and have a modestly decent life.

And when I quit my day job, is just a matter of how much and how soon I can save up that money.

That is, if I truly cannot find work and decent coworkers that I enjoy.

But this is my ticket out if I ever need to take it.

I don't want to feel that I have to put up with a bad workplace just to pay the bills. I will have a way out.

 

[DeafBadger]

I agree with Derek, running a business on the side is a good idea, too, if that fits your temperament.

That's also something I want to successfully do. I have a couple product ideas, but I need capital to get them going.

Basically.. .

1) I want to work in IT and earn more than I have before.
2) Funnel that money mostly into VTSAX.
3) Use some of that money to develop a couple of my ideas.

If my ideas pan out well, then I'll run with that and leave the job behind. Unless I find I really really enjoy IT for some reason. :P

(But I still need to get into the job, first.)

 

[diehardbiker]

I really missed my last job. Wish I was never forced to leave the last job I had. OFC I am very pissed off, but what the hell can I do where almost no one wants to help me. It sucks to stay at home and deal with constantly pain, however I am getting better slowly and I don't know if I can ever go back to where I used to work at. It also sucks to wait for Social Security, I don't think I will have issue have them approve my application. Wait N see.

 

[dereksbicycles]

I agree with Derek, running a business on the side is a good idea, too, if that fits your temperament.

That's also something I want to successfully do. I have a couple product ideas, but I need capital to get them going.

Basically.. .

1) I want to work in IT and earn more than I have before.
2) Funnel that money mostly into VTSAX.
3) Use some of that money to develop a couple of my ideas.

If my ideas pan out well, then I'll run with that and leave the job behind. Unless I find I really really enjoy IT for some reason. :P

(But I still need to get into the job, first.)

Easier said than done. I really don't make enough to retire a millionaire today. I wish I did. I'm sure a bank or investor will help you with capitals. However what I do is spend what I have and expand when I have more. Not all at once.

 

[Jiro]

If you ever worked, are you still working or living on disability?

interesting thread!

my answer is "I am and will still keep working!". I've never ever collected a check from government. I'm a borderline-workaholic. Living on disability will means I'll have to drastically reduce my expense.

Poverty? yuck.

 

[DeafBadger]

Easier said than done. I really don't make enough to retire a millionaire today. I wish I did. I'm sure a bank or investor will help you with capitals. However what I do is spend what I have and expand when I have more. Not all at once.

I am really adverse to debt. I don't like it and even now I don't have any debt. That's why I would develop my products with my own capital.

(Although, realistically, there may come a time when I may decide a business loan is a good idea, but ... that depends.)

Regarding "retirement" (I prefer the term "financial independent," because it doesn't mean you'll stop doing the work you love), you don't need as large of a nest egg as you might think if you consider your basic, core monthly expenses. If you know you can draw back expenses to fit within your monthly investment returns, you're just about there. (Some people have done it on as little an investment nest egg as $300k.)

In my view, that's a great insurance policy against a bad workplace, or layoffs. Or a ticket to living the artist lifestyle without starving. Etc...

 

[MCB]

I've had the same problems in the workplace, including workplace bullying.

It's like being blindsided in a car crash all of a sudden. You don't know where it came from, but it hurts!

One doesn't know where it came from, because the news of its coming was "on the wind" (verbal gossip, probably). Everyone else (hearing) but you knew it was coming.

It sucks bad, I know.

Although my hearing loss was not a significant part of the problem, unless they assumed it was Meniere's, I experienced a similar problem. I was so traumatized that I was afraid to work, for fear it would happen again. I could have gone on disability, but it would have been assumed that all the problem was within me, and therefore they would have discounted everything I would say.

Or a ticket to living the artist lifestyle without starving.

So instead, I chose this. And living a starving artist lifestyle is no picnic!! But rumor has it that my book has gone through a major hoop, and may soon be ready for publication. Right now I am waiting for a source I ordered, and will do one last revision.

It is intended as a textbook for RCIA (Catholic education program for adults intending to convert).

 

[radioman]

I really missed my last job. Wish I was never forced to leave the last job I had. OFC I am very pissed off, but what the hell can I do where almost no one wants to help me. It sucks to stay at home and deal with constantly pain, however I am getting better slowly and I don't know if I can ever go back to where I used to work at. It also sucks to wait for Social Security, I don't think I will have issue have them approve my application. Wait N see.

I too miss my last job -- but at same time its a mixed bag of blessing and good omen that its over. It does REALLY suck not to be working so I been doing little projects all over. Hope you are feeling better, and as for SS, not sure how long you been waiting , but you should be following up with a phone call for now.

 

[VacationGuy234]

I am really adverse to debt. I don't like it and even now I don't have any debt.

This, ^^^, is the key if you can do it. If you get debt free, you have the power to change jobs at will as you are not under anyone's thumb. It may take years to do this. but once you have no debt the credit card companies pay you to keep their cards with instead of the other way around. If you get laid off, it doesn't even put a chink in your armor.

Real power comes from no debt..