Finding a man tolerant of your lack of hearing

Dixie

Dixie

Farting Snowflakes
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Not that it is a bad thing but my ex was not very tolerant of my lack of hearing. Made me feel stupid really. But thats long gone.

How do I find a decent man that is not only going to be respectful of me and my DD but also tolerant of my hoh??
 
My ex wasnt tolerate of my hearing loss but he wasnt bad as compared to some of my deaf friends' hubbies. They have NO clue about deafness and put their wives down for not hearing well enough and wont be willing to learn sign. I cant get involved but there are times I just want to pour ice cold water on their privates and yell "Wake up STUPID!"

Good luck finding a man who has understanding and tolerance. I was lucky to find that in my current husband and it helped that we were good friends for 3 years before we started dating and that he learned sign language throughout our friendship. When I first met him, he knew zip signs. Now, he can communicate easily with most deaf people.

Important, take your time. :)
 
KINGOFNOOBS said:
Simple, find hoh or deaf guy :)
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After splitting up with my ex, I vowed that I would never date a hearing guy but look who I ended up with again! A hearing guy! Go figure! I dated several deaf or hoh guys while I was single...nothing clicked. :dunno:
 
I dont care if he's hearing or not. Its the respect and tolerance I'm looking for. (as well as the six pack abs. ;) )

Ive never dated a hoh/deaf guy, but I think it has more to do with personality and respect above all else. Hopefully God will send me Mr. Right someday, but sometimes I wish his name was Mr. Right Now, lol.
 
Wow. All the hearing guys I was with (except for my first one) had a LOT of tolerance for deaf people.. even went as far as wanting to learn sign language to communicate with me and my friends.

I wish you the best of luck!
 
You got lucky.

I have a friend who is deaf and she married a hearing man who happens to be a cop. They have one child together and he treats her like a queen.

I know I shouldnt be jealous but sometimes I am, but I try not to think about it.

Oh well at least when your'e single you can have more fun! :D
 
Dixie said:
Not that it is a bad thing but my ex was not very tolerant of my lack of hearing. Made me feel stupid really. But thats long gone.

How do I find a decent man that is not only going to be respectful of me and my DD but also tolerant of my hoh??
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:hmm: I'm a guy and, in contrast to your situation, I cannot meet someone who would accept my deaf/hoh state . Almost all of the girls I feel attracted had a bad 'approach' to my deafness and they were driving me mad .

As for your question, there is no simple answer and I believe personality is more important than deafness or any other physical disability .
 
Highlands said:
:hmm: I'm a guy and, in contrast to your situation, I cannot meet someone who would accept my deaf/hoh state . Almost all of the girls I feel attracted had a bad 'approach' to my deafness and they were driving me mad .

As for your question, there is no simple answer and I believe personality is more important than deafness or any other physical disability .
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A bad approach like how? Just curious.
 
Dixie said:
You got lucky.

I have a friend who is deaf and she married a hearing man who happens to be a cop. They have one child together and he treats her like a queen.

I know I shouldnt be jealous but sometimes I am, but I try not to think about it.

Oh well at least when your'e single you can have more fun! :D
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I can understand...when I was in my first marriage and miserable, I would see my friends who had husbands that treated them like queens, I would get a tiny bit jealous. I did go thru a lot to get to where I am. Also, due to learning my lessons, I already knew what I wanted in a man which is why I am with my hubby now. I did not want to make the same mistake again by hooking up with someone who would put me down. Cant live thru that again.

Yea, enjoy being single and try not to think too much about finding the right guy. :)
 
I had no problem with my late hearing husband...He was sooo wonderful .. treated me like a QUEEN.... he passed away in my arm to lung cancer... I miss him VERY MUCH...
 
I've had some boyfriends that weren't tolerant of my deafness.. but my current boyfriend actually said to me when I asked him.. "Your deafness is just a small part of you, it's not all of you."

Basically, he doesn't see it as a barrier.. he sees it as just another piece to the puzzle that is me.
 
shel90 said:
After splitting up with my ex, I vowed that I would never date a hearing guy but look who I ended up with again! A hearing guy! Go figure! I dated several deaf or hoh guys while I was single...nothing clicked. :dunno:
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I just saying that thread starter could do this easy way which is finding deaf/hoh guys who would "tolerate" her hearing status. Power to her if she want to find true love regardless guy's hearing status.
 
KINGOFNOOBS said:
I just saying that thread starter could do this easy way which is finding deaf/hoh guys who would "tolerate" her hearing status. Power to her if she want to find true love regardless guy's hearing status.
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I think from what I can remember, she lives in a very small town and there is not a large deaf community there.
 
Shel is right, I live in a very rural area and I only know of one other deaf/hoh here but she actually lives in a town 15 mins from here. I dont get to see her much, shes the one I mentioned earlier that is married to the cop that treats her like a queen.

As for deaf/hoh guys, I dont know any around here. I dont care what the guy's hearing status is as long as I find one that is respectful and tolerant of my hoh and will treat me and my DD like queens.
 
shel90 said:
A bad approach like how? Just curious.
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They used to tend to consider me dumb cuz I had difficulty in understanding what is going on around me due to the fact that I cannot hear good enough them speak .
 
Highlands said:
They used to tend to consider me dumb cuz I had difficulty in understanding what is going on around me due to the fact that I cannot hear good enough them speak .
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Yea, I know the feeling. Been there before especially in high school. I would meet boys and there was instant attraction. Then, they would start asking my friends about me like "Who is that cute girl?" and my friends, not meaning to, would tell them that I cant hear but can speak well and read lips and most of the time the boys tell them "Oh never mind." My friends would come back and tell me about it and I would feel a big crushing disappointment. It was tough cuz it sure didnt feel good at all! I did manage to snatch 2 boyfriends in high school. :giggle:
 
My first exh have not yet learned nothing and I felt pissed cuz he always started talking and I didnt understand what he was saying. So I told him call me first then start the conversation. Duh!!!!

Right now I am dating with this guy and he does know very little sign which it help and he know that he had to look at me for me to read lip. Yay. I feel so special with him and glad I found him. :D
 
shel90 said:
... I did manage to snatch 2 boyfriends in high school. :giggle:
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:lol:

:hmm: I've never had a girlfriend in university . I never couldn't meet a hoh/deaf girl who would understand and tolerate my difficulty :(

I'm now seriously thinking of getting married to a hearing girl who was my old co-worker. She now is at another department of the same hospital where I work at. She has a good personality and I hope I can cope with my hard of hearing problems in a hearing world.. me thinks she is worth of it :)
 
Huh

I guess it all depends on where your at and who your around. Hard for you to find a hearing girl that accepts you, hard for me to find a deaf man that accepts the fact that I am still learning, one that will be as patient with my inability to communicate as good as he can, one that will help me learn...
 
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