Don't Be like My Parents

K

killalot

New Member
Joined
Feb 19, 2006
Messages
10
Reaction score
0
I am 17.

My parents tell to be active. For example, I got on the football team. They imediatly made me quit. Before I got on the team they were tell me I am was not capible of getting on it and if I do some how then I could play. My parents lie alot. I am a little out of shape and they tell me I need to loose some weight.(I am 6ft and 178 pounds). Their solution is play sports and activities. But then they tell "Make sure you grades stay the same if you play sports"(loads of pycological stuff) (implying don't do activities).

My parents are hard core about grades and they want all As.
OMG! I can't imagine what will happen if i got a C. In high school!!
In 5th grade I failed one class and my mom broke all my games and systems and dad threw loads of stuff away. And i wasn't allowed to do video games and tv for 5 months :) They bought all that stuff after 5 months(next report card). They tell me that i am getting the grades for myself and all i see is them wanting the grades.

My parents are smart. Trust me it is not fun. You can never! get away with anything. My mom has a Phd (Proffesor) and thinks she is the center of the world. Dad got a masters in industrial engineering(manager)and is a push over.

My dad is always away.(last saw him 3 months ago) Mom's got no time for me. She claims she is always buzy writing papers. She feels sucess is more important than family. She is very mean.

My parents don't let me leave the house. 5 days of the week(school days) they say i got to concentrate on homework. They don't ever allow exceptions. My mom claims I am brurden on her and I need to get my licence.
She only drops me at friend's house one a week but if i am lucky twice.. Sleepover rarely. So the only thing i do is play video games and watch tv.
My parents have a porblem with video games and tv, so i am only allowed to play technically on friday. :) But they let me play on saturday and sunday.
More or less i am locked in the house all the time with no one to talk. My mom moniters me closely but she doesn't have time to interact.

I decide to take piano classes and golf lessons. My parents force me to get tutored in english(weak subject). I hate the weekends. Saturday morning I got to get up by 7 and got to music at 10. And on Saturday got to get up at 8 and trave to a diff city to get tutored at 1 and ends at 4. And my mom always starts early so we won't be late. I tried to quit there routines but I get told "you are freekin lazy""You just want to sit on you ass""Make sure you get an A in english""You are lethergic" My parents also use many metaphores like comparing me to a lowly thing. So always ends up with a fight and I continue doing these thing. I am stuck it forever with no exit.

I think this is enough. I could keep on going on and on and on.
Is there a way to deal with overprotecting parenting. Parents don't know what is going on. Oh ya didn't have friends till this year; i feel lucky.

I feel like shit every day. Is normal? My parents say it is normal.
I feel demoralized.

email: aceofhearts@hotmail.com
Email me if you can guide me or help me or discuss if you have a similar problem.
 
I recommend you talk w/your counselloring and how much r u felt so angry and upset w/your parent who force you everything.. which you not deserved...
So Hopefully you could work it out w/your counselloring.. and to see if your counselloring can talk out w/your parent and don't need pressure on you...

I've been there my Adopt parents who they are very strict and kept captive me all the time and want me that... that... that.. what parent really wants! I dislike of it.. and decide ran away from my parent.. I"m glad my own living.. Now I'm 37 yrs old.. Long time ago, when I was teenager. My Adopt parent are abused me being "slave kid" doing it for my parent everything... Pretty crap.. Quite long story.. I ain't talk about this. anyway.. I recommend you talk out w/your counselloring..
Wishes you have all the best luck!
 
First I would like to say I'm sorry to hear about your situation with your parents as you know that being a parents is alot of work, and we try our best to raise our children in a way we think it's right, even through sometimes our children may not agree on how we raise them, but every parents out there don't raise their children the same as yours do but I can understand that your parents wants you to do well in school with your grades, but it's not neccessary to have all straight A's on their report card, your parents should be proud that you're not failing in any of your class, and that should be good enough for them, they can't expect to have a perfect child, who will get all A's on their report cards or expect to be better or the same as they are..Your parents should not push or pressure you to do better, but to help you by being involved in your education, so they know where or what areas you may need help with...


It's important that children spend time with both parents and they shouldn't allow their work to get in between, but being there does help alot and that what you need from both of your parents....


Give your parents a chance, and talk to them, tell them how you feel about this, hopefully things will work out for all of you.....


Good luck and please do keep us update how it's going....
 
If I have parents like that, I would do what they say. Because all of that time spending with friends, doing sports, music, and other stuff are a big waste of time.

I bet you live in a big house, huh?
Don't you wanna own a big house someday too and drive a sporty BMW and a real nice job? Maybe be a lawyer?
 
Yea start with talking to school counsler and go from there. You deserves a good grade and spending time with your parents. My son get good grade and do get reward for that. He also get to spend time with me 4 times out of a week. Right now he is at his dad's house and I missed him already. :(
 
cont...

Miss*Pinocchio said:
If I have parents like that, I would do what they say. Because all of that time spending with friends, doing sports, music, and other stuff are a big waste of time.

I bet you live in a big house, huh?
Don't you wanna own a big house someday too and drive a sporty BMW and a real nice job? Maybe be a lawyer?
Click to expand...

No, I don't live in a big house. I live in a big townhome. :)
My parents are always wanting the better stuff (success) so they move always. :) We move 7 month ago to NC.

My mom only works 2 days a week for like 3-4 hour per day.
She writes papers all day and night and is very buzy. (She already met her requirement). Like the other day I got a form form gym class and i filled it out and asked her to sign. She said "wait a sec" stood there for around "20 mins and she kept on typing" and finally she signed!!!!!!!!!!(It was almost like I wasn't there)

I do everything they say but they always want more and there is never goal; they always want better. Like if I have all A in all classes and I don't have any homework they tell me read books or study more. If I don't sooner or later there will be an implyed negative remark.

My parents want me to be a doctor. Never got a say in it. lol I think they want me to wish I would become a docor every birthday and I do. That is the only thing I wished for till now.
 
bad trait

The Worst Thing : My preant repeat things over and over and over again. Like 2 weeks ago I went downstairs and drank milk like 3 feet away from my mom. she was talking on the phone. (duration of 5 mins to made milk and drink) and rushed back and encase myself in my room. She called me downstairs and so I went and she asked me if I drank milk!!!
(There are loads of scenarios that happned like this)
 
Household matter

GalaxyAngel said:
I recommend you talk w/your counselloring and how much r u felt so angry and upset w/your parent who force you everything.. which you not deserved...
So Hopefully you could work it out w/your counselloring.. and to see if your counselloring can talk out w/your parent and don't need pressure on you...

I've been there my Adopt parents who they are very strict and kept captive me all the time and want me that... that... that.. what parent really wants! I dislike of it.. and decide ran away from my parent.. I"m glad my own living.. Now I'm 37 yrs old.. Long time ago, when I was teenager. My Adopt parent are abused me being "slave kid" doing it for my parent everything... Pretty crap.. Quite long story.. I ain't talk about this. anyway.. I recommend you talk out w/your counselloring..
Wishes you have all the best luck!
Click to expand...

Well my parent don't want me to talk to anyone about what happens in the household. They are very serious about that.
 
No soultion

Well I can't go to the counsellor bacause my parents will find out.

My parent don't want to drop me at school anymore, they consider it a lot of responsibilty put upon them. So, they are getting me a car for the purpose of drive back and forth from school. (only-probably gonna time me or something wierd as usual)

I need to get my licence and I need a positive reply(I am ok and fit to drive mentally) form the counsellor. Maybe be he may consider me unfit.

More or less no one to talk to about it.
I got 2 friends but I don't want to tell em maybe they will think I am wierd.
I am wierd enough already. I am the quiet and mysterious kid at school (and a pushover)

Well before it was a life time of loneliness but now only 1 and 1/2 years left of sitting I my room doing stuff on my computer, watching tv, and playing video games by myself on friday nights till 2 am. Lol I got 33 myspace friends :P

Well are there any possible other solutions? :cool:
 
Hugs and kisses

I need hugs and kisses! My mom never even huged me and never wants to. I dont know why. Quote "I am not a silly mother like you friend's parents or other moms at you school, I have goals to achive and deadlines to meet." I huged my dad a couple of times. I am not adopted, you may think how is it possbile. Well I don't want to bore you about the extensive story.(novel length) Is it normal? Do You atleast give hugs to your kids?
 
Yes I do give them prenty of hugs and kisses
 
First of all, I'm very sorry how you feel toward your parents. I can tell thru your post that you has a low self-esteem... I know it's not your fault... It's very sad to read your story here... :(

I would suggest you to read this link about esteem and it would help you to understand how you feel...

It's explian what esteem is. It would help you to improve your esteem and stand yourself if you feel what your parents did is not right.

http://www.alldeaf.com/showthread.php?t=22195&highlight=esteem

http://www.alldeaf.com/showthread.php?t=22006&highlight=spank


Yes I would suggest you to have a sit to talk with your parents first then counsellor if it doesn't work with your parents.

Did you know that there're children protection law? You has the right to state how you feel toward your parents to counsellor or CPS. They will help you and your parents how to solve this issues and improve this retainship between you and your parents.

Yes I can understand your parents's side that they want you get well at school with your grades but they can't expect you as prefect child with all A'. They should help you to improve your education and your wish should be fulfilling, not do what they want with you... Example doctor, etc... It's your dream wish, not their dream.

Of course I hug my children and praise them, no matter what because they deserve it from me. Patience and Praise children is always work to improve their grades, not push and force them because it would make them feel unhappy and neglect their education. No trust bond between children and parents...

I would suggest you to talk with counsellor if you really love your parents and want be good retainship with them. It's counsellor who help to convince you and your parents what right or wrong... It make retainship stronger.
 
From what you are writing, it sounds like your parents are holding you as if you are prisoner or hostage, would not let you go out and have some fun... Seems like they don't know how to have fun. I bet your parents are cold and black heart people.. that is not nice of them to neglect you and you do need some loving and caring from your own parents.... if you are tired of living like this, what about if you enticamped (?) from your parents and go live with relatives or friends? Just don't listen to them, go ahead and do what you have to do to get away from them.
 
racheleggert said:
From what you are writing, it sounds like your parents are holding you as if you are prisoner or hostage, would not let you go out and have some fun... Seems like they don't know how to have fun. I bet your parents are cold and black heart people.. that is not nice of them to neglect you and you do need some loving and caring from your own parents.... if you are tired of living like this, what about if you enticamped (?) from your parents and go live with relatives or friends? Just don't listen to them, go ahead and do what you have to do to get away from them.
Click to expand...
I second that, Racheleggert, It looks like that the parents are giving bad influence on this and try to hurt his/her reputions~BTW your parents need to seek counsler to work on their relationship with you and to trust you..
 
Consider yourself blessing to have a great parents as yours. Think about this, your parents want what is best for you and want u to get straight A's and go to college. I understand where their point of view. I unds u have problems with this because your going thru alot of phases where you will become adult soon and it can cause alot of confuse and struggle. I went thru with my kids when they were in last year of high school. Be patient, it shall pass. I can see they love u very much, they may act their love differently from others.
 
racheleggert said:
From what you are writing, it sounds like your parents are holding you as if you are prisoner or hostage, would not let you go out and have some fun... Seems like they don't know how to have fun. I bet your parents are cold and black heart people.. that is not nice of them to neglect you and you do need some loving and caring from your own parents.... if you are tired of living like this, what about if you enticamped (?) from your parents and go live with relatives or friends? Just don't listen to them, go ahead and do what you have to do to get away from them.
Click to expand...

Are u telling him to rebel against his own parents by not listen to them? He has to follow their rules while he lives with them. When he turns 18 then he shall leave and begin his own life as he wants to but as for now he is minor.
 
Well, it's hard for me to give you advices. I need to hear the other side of the story which are your parents. How am I going to find out if you are telling the full story or not? Are there any reasons why your parents keep you at bay? I guess we will never know the real reasons why your parents are doing things like that until we hear from your parents' story.
 
Killalot, I am sorry to read of your situation. Your'e hearing, right? If yes, what, may I ask, led you to Alldeaf?
 
Cont...

racheleggert said:
From what you are writing, it sounds like your parents are holding you as if you are prisoner or hostage, would not let you go out and have some fun... Seems like they don't know how to have fun. I bet your parents are cold and black heart people.. that is not nice of them to neglect you and you do need some loving and caring from your own parents.... if you are tired of living like this, what about if you enticamped (?) from your parents and go live with relatives or friends? Just don't listen to them, go ahead and do what you have to do to get away from them.
Click to expand...
No, I don't have any relatives. Or any good friends. I just want stay with my parents no matter what. :)


My parents don't want me to have fun is beacuse they don't watch tv or do anything fun. (They might maybe once in a while they watch tv)
 
Last edited:
Back
Top