Do you have a funny story that involves misunderstand of spoken english

bojaq1

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I have one to share with you.

My exhusbands father was all dressed up in the evening ( a christian man mind you ) I asked him where he was going ? He told me to the CHIROPRACTOR....

So I told my then husband " no crhirpractor open this late at night who is he fooling he's having a affair on your mom.... His reaction like not surprised men do those things.....

A week or so later I talked to my mother in law about this ... not right !

I was informed by my father in law Jacque I was going to

CHOIR PRACTICE :shock:

not having an affair

I felt so bad about the whole thing.... lucky for me my mother and father in law got a good laugh about the whole thing.

Husband later became ex for the same very reason.

:shock:

:laugh2:
 
I don't have one BIG funny story but I've been getting a few good laughs recently. Like this past Monday:

Friend: "God! The hallway smells like sofa!"
Me: "Sofa? Like mildew or something?"
Friend: "SULFUR, Kristin. He said it smells like SULFUR"
Me: "oooooh..."

:lol:
 
I was talking to one of my neighbor about the birds in our yard and my neighbor
said she saw a lot of 'goldfish' the other day. I am thinking WOW how did the 'goldfish' get in the yard! My neighbor had said she saw a lot of 'goldfinches' in the yard, not goldfish! It was funny as I was trying to picture goldfish swimming in the puddles in the driveway.
 
I was talking to one of my neighbor about the birds in our yard and my neighbor
said she saw a lot of 'goldfish' the other day. I am thinking WOW how did the 'goldfish' get in the yard! My neighbor had said she saw a lot of 'goldfinches' in the yard, not goldfish! It was funny as I was trying to picture goldfish swimming in the puddles in the driveway.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJFwssQirQU]Fish (Moon child) - YouTube[/ame]

That's all I could think of when I read this one. :giggle: The clip is a little long but what I'm talking about it only a few seconds in. The movie is "Moon Child", in case you're curious. Sorry there's no CC.)
 
WOW ! I never heard of that movie! It is looks really heavy! I am going to check it out!


That is funny with the goldfish swimming in the air. I was not stoned so I did not see any goldfish swimming in my driveway! LOL!!
 
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the famous one.....i want a penis what she meant to say i want happyness
 
Madonna's Vogue performance at the MTV Music Awards show in 1990. I watched it and had it on videotape one time. I had NEVER, ever been able to figure out what she said precisely at 4:30 at this clip:

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O8s1-Af-KSc]Madonna Vogue MTV Video Music Awards - YouTube[/ame]

Just before that, Madonna and her entourage moves to the right before Madonna brings them forward before saying;

Beauty's where you find it

(actually, I just found out two minutes ago that she says it once before, but you don't see it the first time with the camera cutting just before that)

I could not believe my eyes and ears all those years ago and laughed because I had always thought it said;

Makes you wanna F* me

I was like WHAT??!! How did she get away with that on stage?!!! You see, it has the same number of syllables. I swear to hell IT LOOKS LIKE THE LATTER IS WHAT SHE'S SAYING!! Check it out! Maybe I need me so lovin'!

Edit: a friend of mine told me what she said about 4 years ago

Edit 2: I just realized I got another part wrong. At the very beginning where the first words are, "Strike a pose," said twice. I also had always though it said, "Think about it." Now that I've watched this part a few times, I can see that it does say "Strike a pose." The "r" sound is the first clue and the "o" in pose is the second clue. Now, I can see and hear it clearly. Why does this happen to me?
 
WOW ! I never heard of that movie! It is looks really heavy! I am going to check it out!


That is funny with the goldfish swimming in the air. I was not stoned so I did not see any goldfish swimming in my driveway! LOL!!

It's really good. Good blend of "funny" and "tears your heart out". I love it!

the famous one.....i want a penis what she meant to say i want happyness

:giggle:
 
A clown at work said he "was stabbed" had a thick mustache and is from the west so his accent and manner of speaking very rapidly I might add is rather confusing most of the time. He had what looked to be a new tattoo of a small heart on his arm and I inquired about it and that is what I heard back. I immediately second guessed what I had heard but didn't want to make a fool of myself and just said "oh" and went about my day thinking to myself well, he must have covered up the "stab, or wound" with the tattoo. It was rather stupid of me to think of that but what else could I think of? Anyways I got the nerve up to asked him if he had said he was stabbed and he said no, I stamped my arm with a heart stamp. How embarrassing.
Last time I ask for clarification...

Another incident involved my husband he was talking about work and half listening I had heard " I cummed on her " and said you WHAT?!!?? about to fly off the handle thinking he had admitted some some affair of sorts. He had actually said " I got kumho tires after I got off work ".

I've too many others to list but most of them involve either my husband or or stupid misunderstandings at work. Most of the time I just ignore what I misunderstand but when it's something that could be "serious" like being hurt or..having an affair well-the idiot surfaces. :)
 
I was on the phone today setting some test for myself at the hospital and was being asked all kinds of questions like my DOB , address etc then it sound like woman said some about 'redneck' and I am thinking WTF! The woman had asked me if I had a religion , I thought she asked if I was a redneck!
 
I know I have too many to count too. But it just reminds me not to jump to conclusions...

I don't know how many fight my husband and I have had because I mistook what He said... Now most of the time when I start to fly off he says wait wait what did you think I said.... lol

Life is funny
 
I know I have too many to count too. But it just reminds me not to jump to conclusions...

I don't know how many fight my husband and I have had because I mistook what He said... Now most of the time when I start to fly off he says wait wait what did you think I said.... lol

Life is funny

You're lucky you have a husband that will actually stop and ask you what you thought you heard before getting into heated argument.:giggle:

mine doesn't. We go at it like wild cats with one or the other leaving the house. Although I cannot complain...
the makeup after* is quite good. :D
 
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