curiousity, any of u...

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SpiceHD

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did any of you told your family about being GLBT? what was the result?

i told my sister once that i was BI and she freaked out big time.naturally i was hurt cuz i thought i could tell her anything. Grandparents disowned me for several years but now i visit them stubbornly because i m trying to prove to them that no matter what condition is no matter how much they hurt me, ill alway be there for them and ill alway love them. they might learn from me... or they might never will. *shrugs* Of course i was hurt and ANGRY, had lot of agruement with them about that issue and lot of others too. now its kinda getting better cuz i am stubborn and kept on trying to get in touch and etc.

I told my dad and he reacted first by being shocked then joking asked me if he can have videotape of the action. (his way of handling the news he didnt like by joking about things.... he never really wanted it lol) later he came to me, told me he think its cool, after all its my choice, my life... but he would like to have at least a grandchild first if thats possible.... his hint was to tell me he prefer me being straight but tries hard not to control or reject me.

my mom never knew cuz she died before i found out about being Bi sexual. But i could imagine her reaction. she would accept it freely and probably would tease me about it once in a while in good nature.. probably ask me why i feel that way and would have good discuss about it.


so whats yours? oh yea if u did told them and saw their reactions.. what was your reaction to their reaction? (hope u guys understand my last question lol)
 
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I'm not gay but can share experiences of friends (I hope it is OK for me to post here). It is difficult to confront it with family members, as well as friends, etc. Some parents will outright lose control and disown their children. Others are very accepting of it. Others have funny ways of dealing with it, such as your fathers reaction. Although his response may seem strange, its his way of dealing with the news (as you explained).

My lesbian friends father had a difficult time dealing with it when she made it known she was a lesbian. He did a lot of focusing on her being somewhat of a tomboy when she was younger. She enjoyed playing with the Tonka trucks in the mud and never cared for dolls. Thats just the way she was when she was younger, but he was finding blame in everything. "I should have taken the trucks away from her and made her play with Barbies" was his comment to me. He did a lot of blaming himself for her turning out that way (as he put it). It took a lot of explaining to him that there wasn't anything to 'blame' and there was no 'fault' and she turned out just fine...she was happy and it took a lot of reassurance to him that he did raise her properly and was a good father.

He eventually came to accept it and they now have a great relationship. I think he still wonders about it but is very accepting of it. She is a member of this forum but never posts...I'll encourage her to stop in and offer her thoughts on the topic.
 
u did good post in here... i did told my mom that when i was bi in 2001, she accpeted who am i cuz of she love me who am i... my mom's older brother is gay anyway... so i still lesbo anyway!
 
oh yea i forgot ot add... if u guys havent told your family.. why not? what stops u from telling them?


:bump:
 
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haven't told my family yet. Still coming to terms with it I guess. It took me a few years to come to terms with the fact that I'm hoh/ disabled. Many of my friends at school know however...and their reaction has been AMAZING . I remember my friend OB said something that really touched me " I don't care if you like girls or guys. I just want you to be happy" and a lot of my school friends didn't act surprised that I'm bi.
 
Fly Free said:
After some searching i found the thread -- this thread is basically a :repost: from this thread: http://www.alldeaf.com/showthread.php?t=2388

Mods: can u merge those 2 threads together please qq mucho gracias!
Click to expand...


oops sorry didnt realize i was reposting ... yea mod please do merge those two threads together .. thanks flyfree for bring that one up to my attention.
 
no plm Spice -- i had thought it sounded much like a repost so i went to look for it :lol:

:thumb: its good that u revived it tho cuz we have more new members :D
 
My sis in law told us that she was an lesbian and did not inform her parents, she wanted us to know first and we were perfectly fine with her sexuality choice. She wanted our support when she told her parents about being lesbian. cuz we had gay/les friends and was aware of their sexuality beliefs (including their frustration to tell ppl)

she told them two years ago, (she was married bef, ended div - long story), dad accepted it pretty good because he knew she was tomboy all her life and wasn't surprised at all. mom did not accept at all, was very bitter to my sis in law, we were there and supported sis 100 percent, mom was disappointed with us and dad for supporting sis. i told mom that she has to move on with her life and she can not make decisions for sis because she has a life of her own.

probably abt 6 months later, mom is starting to accept sis and partner. still parts of things mom still won't accept. I have my two little boys to call sis and partner "aunts" i want boys to accept who they are even they may be too young to understand. it may be difficult to tell parents, it is better to know than nothing at all.
 
SpiceHD

I know what you mean. I'm who Taylor was discussing and asked me to post about this. What he said really sums up what happened. My father blamed himself for it even though he never did anything wrong to begin with. He was my adopted father and did a lot to give me a good stable home. When I came out about my sexuality, he wasn't angry with me but thought he was a failure. I got really depressed when he thought he was a failure. He was actually a great father, probably better than most kids had with their real parents. He did a good job raising me, then one day it comes crashing down on him and he thought he did something wrong. Taylor was right about the Tonka trucks and he said he he wished he had taken them away from me but I looked happy. I don't think I was tomboy but I didn't do the girl things.

It took a lot of telling him that everything was good and Taylor had talked to him a lot too about it. Before he passed away we did get a chance to really talk about it and put everything out in the open. He died knowing that he didn't fail and did a great job in bringing me and the other kids up. Its just I was happier with the company of a woman than a man. It took a long time but he eventually came around to understanding and stopped blaming himself.

He was a very compassionate person who took care of us kids even though we weren't his by blood. This is how I know Taylor and he can tell you the same thing about him.

Some parents react in different ways. Some are angry that their kids will go to hell because that is their belief. Some parents come to accept it but others will never accept it. For people who want to tell their parents, I can say to hope for the best but to really be prepared for the worst. I know people who were not as lucky as I was and it ruined the relationships they had with their parents.
 
I went thru like other lesbians/gays went thru. So, my parents love me who I am as their daughter. PERIOD! I am happy with that than just disown me or push me out of their life. I am grateful that they didnt do that. :) I love them too much than anything itself. :)
 
I've never told my family that I was bisexual - not because I'm afraid to, but because I know my parents all too well.

My mother is a former HS counselor at one of the major high schools and Daddy-o was a former Dean of a major university...and I've seen their actions and read their statements. They were very accepting of the GLBT community, but they have said they would not accept it of their one and only child, their daughter.

While I know they will still love me as their daughter, and try to accept me as I am, the relationship will be changed and probably not repairable. I know that they already have "suspicions" of my sexuality, and I have tried dating str8 for many years to make them happy, I was not happy myself.

This year, I decided to make myself happy once again...and I am now. However, I know I will have to tell my parents eventually...and believe me, I am not looking forward to it at all. That is why I will tell them...AFTER I move out first. Period.

If I remember, I will let you know what happens next year...sometime in the fall.
 
Mmmm.

I have had a few experiences, and I never told my folks. I don't think it's necessary for them to know EVERYTHING about my past - and I keep it that way. My mother is not the type who would be very accepting, and my father - well, let's just say he's more like a brother than a dad. I don't feel 100% comfortable revealing any of my past indiscretions with either one of 'em.

I am happily married now and that's the only lifestyle my folks need to know about. ;) We're all happy!
 
Gross.

My dad cheated on my mom...
Gave her Gonorhea...
And he was doing drugs and things like that
before I was born.

My genetic doctors said my genes were mutated.

And I read about how drugs and diseases
and him sleeping around can cause a gene mutated.

I think people need to stop being open minded...
and just live right...

I don't understand why people gotta do all of those things...
just to get an orgasm or get high. I don't get it.
Why not go to amusement park and go out and have fun, go skydiving
or stuff like that if you want to get HIGH!!!!
And why tell your parents what you did in the bedroom?

Just want to know, yeah I am whiney. but so what?
 
TTT - You make me feel heartbroken since you been strike on GLBTQI. I dont like the way you did in here and other threads. I not want to see any of this.

I am southern rebel and GAY! *sigh* *duhhhhh*
 
TTT said:
My dad cheated on my mom...
Gave her Gonorhea...
And he was doing drugs and things like that
before I was born.

My genetic doctors said my genes were mutated.

And I read about how drugs and diseases
and him sleeping around can cause a gene mutated.

I think people need to stop being open minded...
and just live right...

I don't understand why people gotta do all of those things...
just to get an orgasm or get high. I don't get it.
Why not go to amusement park and go out and have fun, go skydiving
or stuff like that if you want to get HIGH!!!!
And why tell your parents what you did in the bedroom?

Just want to know, yeah I am whiney. but so what?
Click to expand...

(scoff-ths) there you are.... nothing new off topic..

Cant you just move on and grow up.. loose up your closed mind..
and dont judge on others..
(scoffts) nothing new off topic..
 
im just merely curious of how each family react to the fact about GLBT i do not want to hear any negatives here :)

but TTT does have a point... why should we tell our parents about what we do in bedroom... however... we are not exactly tell them in details.. are we? i mean we just tell them who we wish to date... right?
 
And I read about how drugs and diseases
and him sleeping around can cause a gene mutated.
Click to expand...
No, drugs and diseases don't generally cause mutations in genes!

I don't understand why people gotta do all of those things...
just to get an orgasm or get high. I don't get it.
Why not go to amusement park and go out and have fun, go skydiving
or stuff like that if you want to get HIGH!!!!
And why tell your parents what you did in the bedroom?
Click to expand...
What things? You falling for the same ol' "GLB lifestyles are EVIL!" that a lot of those family values types yap about? Not every GLB person is a sick hedonistic partying person.
I have never told my parents (or anyone else) what I've done in the bedroom...they just know that I am bi,and like both guys and girls.
 
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