Considering divorce, im hearing, married to deaf

He has his mind set that since he is deaf, he is going to live a life of mediocrity, so why should he attempt to change if he is only going to fail?

maybe he needs someone a bit more supportive - as it appears he has been brainwashed into believing his abilities in life are severely limited.
 
Bet if you tell him GTFO and dont come back without a job, that will make him understand Deaf or not. he has a child to raise and if he isnt supporting and you are carrying all the weight, then you can do without. Just my 2 cents worth as I did that to my first wife who thought she was going to come live with me and work on things, instead, she moved in and just went partying every night with friends. BOOT....SLAM !
 

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Everything can be fixed with a can of whipped cream and some handcuffs. Cheaper than a marriage counselor too.

just saying ...
 
I think your husband is using his deafness as a way to be lazy. Deaf people can do anything a hearing person can except hear. There is no reason for him to ignore your birthday or holidays. Exchanging gifts with each other is another way to express love. You have told him repeatedly how important certain things are to you, yet he ignores all of them. A marriage takes two people and a lot of hard work. From what you shared it sounds like you are doing all of the work.

If both people don't want to make the effort it is not going to last. I love being married and yes we are still super in love. 27 years and it just gets better and better.

You deserve to be happy too. You know what is worse than spending 8 years in an unhappy marriage....8 years and one day.
 
Angel1989 said:
I think your husband is using his deafness as a way to be lazy. Deaf people can do anything a hearing person can except hear. There is no reason for him to ignore your birthday or holidays. Exchanging gifts with each other is another way to express love. You have told him repeatedly how important certain things are to you, yet he ignores all of them. A marriage takes two people and a lot of hard work. From what you shared it sounds like you are doing all of the work.

If both people don't want to make the effort it is not going to last. I love being married and yes we are still super in love. 27 years and it just gets better and better.

You deserve to be happy too. You know what is worse than spending 8 years in an unhappy marriage....8 years and one day.
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Christmas is about giving, not receiving.... but all the other occasions, I feel he doesnt care or love her enough to even give it thought. Regardless if he was brought up poor, he is living a better life now, maybe not up to par per her terms but better than he was brought up as. laziness is about all summed up into one big package with him. he doesnt make an effort to listen or accomodate anything.
Lets see, if this was me acting this way.... it would mean exactly this...
I suckered you into liking/loving me and I have no feelings/love or interests in you other than to have a free ride to sit on my ass. What you want a present? Go buy you something, What, your not happy but scared to leave me? Ha, I got security.
Just what i make out of it. you are making all the efforts and he isnt even trying at the least, all he does is make excuses to do nothing. If any of this is true. hell, im deaf and I hold the fort down.
 
ncff07 said:
Actually I wasn't referring to you I was referring to Jiro and DHB bickering back and forth about off topic stuff.
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OK , you did say " The rest of you simmer down " so that sound like you meant everyone.
 
I'm deaf and I've had a hearing girlfriend. I gave her Christmas and birthday gifts. It pretty much sucks that deafness is being used as an excuse when it should not.
 
it not bc he deaf he become relient on you something he may have done if he was hearing..It easy and common for one do loving and other to be loved.
my husband hearing and although we live separate lives I tend to rely on him mostly bc I lazy...I think you both need reality check,maybe councilling
 
It seem that you both left out before decide to get marry. It always come with everything to agree each other.

After committee each other for rest of life, love is patience for both each other.

I find it odd about use "deaf" as excuse that cannot give gift, etc. That sound too corny to me. Sorry.
 
Reading the OP's first two posts #1 & 2, describing her significant other, it is amazing to me why she went forward with the relationship in the first days......
 
PowerON said:
It seem that you both left out before decide to get marry. It always come with everything to agree each other.

After committee each other for rest of life, love is patience for both each other.

I find it odd about use "deaf" as excuse that cannot give gift, etc. That sound too corny to me. Sorry.
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think he tight or had rough childhood deaf is NO excuse not to give.No excuse get decent job this man got issues deafness just one part of it.sad situation
 
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