Child Custody Battle

shel90 said:
Thanks everyone for the encourgement and support.

I am not really worried about losing but if I do, I will accept it and adjust to the situation. One thing I am just frigtened of are the hefty legal fees. I have a fear of going back into heavy debt like I was 5 years ago. It was so bad that I felt so overwhelmed and panicky. So many times I came this close to declaring bankrupty but I didnt. Now, I am almost debt free so I am having difficulty with the idea of legal fees. :ohno:
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Your ex husband cannot use your deafness to win the full custody...you need to talk to your lawyer.. More likey judge will grant you a full custody unless your ex husband has evidences that you are unfit mother......he will lose... You will win.... think positive...

More likely judge will dismiss this case if your ex husband uses deafness as unfit mother... your husband would be embarassed.... my ex husband was so embarassed.. judge ordered him to pay my lawyer's fee.... and must pay child support.. and gave him limited visitations....

you have nothing to worry about...
 
shel90 said:
Thanks everyone for the encourgement and support.

I am not really worried about losing but if I do, I will accept it and adjust to the situation. One thing I am just frigtened of are the hefty legal fees. I have a fear of going back into heavy debt like I was 5 years ago. It was so bad that I felt so overwhelmed and panicky. So many times I came this close to declaring bankrupty but I didnt. Now, I am almost debt free so I am having difficulty with the idea of legal fees. :ohno:
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I understand that panic over finances....raising my son as a widowed single mom gave me a taste of that! :giggle: Hopefully, this custody issue won't drag out too long and amount in a lot of legal bills. Hang in there, girl!
 
Your deafness should have not been an issue as to who is the better parent or not.

Since your daughter is 10 years old, The judge will probably put the age factor into consideration because the child is aware of her environment/surroundings.

Have you thought about trying to get documentations from her teacher, school counselor, doctors, so and on to prove that your deafness is not an issue? It is only to prove that you are capable of taking care of your daughter and providing her what she needs. That might help bring your point across front of the judge to get the ball rolling. Who knows?

The legal prices are no fun to be dealt with but at times, I suppose we all got to do what we have to do in order to get the point across.

Although, I do wish you the best in this custody battle. It won't be easy but it will prevail in the long run. :)
 
I know that he is grasping at straws cuz he has nothing over me. I am married, my husband and I make good money, we dont do drugs or party, very family-orienated, have stable jobs, and so much more.

I just think that is so LOW of him to use my deafness against me after how many obstacles I had to overcome with it. My ex and I have known each other for almost 20 years so he saw the struggles I went through in high school and my self-esteem issues. Instead of being proud of me of what I have accomplished, he is stooping so low to use my deafness against me. I was just thinking about how really low that is. Do u think that is low of him to do that or he is just playing hardball to get what he wants? He can use whatever he wants like for example, the area we live in is not the best, against me which wouldnt be so personal but my deafness??? It would be like using his Hispanic status against him but I wouldnt do that cuz he values his cultural background and I am proud of him and his family, especially his mother, for overcoming discrimination and barriers to get where they are now...all of them are successful.
 
shel90 said:
I know that he is grasping at straws cuz he has nothing over me. I am married, my husband and I make good money, we dont do drugs or party, very family-orienated, have stable jobs, and so much more.

I just think that is so LOW of him to use my deafness against me after how many obstacles I had to overcome with it. My ex and I have known each other for almost 20 years so he saw the struggles I went through in high school and my self-esteem issues. Instead of being proud of me of what I have accomplished, he is stooping so low to use my deafness against me. I was just thinking about how really low that is. Do u think that is low of him to do that or he is just playing hardball to get what he wants? He can use whatever he wants like for example, the area we live in is not the best, against me which wouldnt be so personal but my deafness??? It would be like using his Hispanic status against him but I wouldnt do that cuz he values his cultural background and I am proud of him and his family, especially his mother, for overcoming discrimination and barriers to get where they are now...all of them are successful.
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It sounds like to me that he is using the deafness thing to pull you down easily. Since you and he know each other for twenty years, he knows how to push your button and make you angry. Try not to get pissed off, but look for a solution to the problem. One of you can sit and talk things out and say " Our daughter can live with you during the summer for three months and then she comes home to go school here. Something like that where he can see her for a long period of time. It is more about "balance" the custody. Some parents don't think its enough to see their kids only on the weekend. I am sure you do understand how hard it is.

When you go to court, you should list out things where you think your daughter should be living with. You said that you don't mind having your daughter living with her father as long as he has a place to stay that is "steady." He might say things that were not nice about you, but try your best to act like it comes out one hear to another. Show the judge that you have respect and know how to behave like an adult. I m sure you will have no problem winning the case.
 
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