Bend My Ear, I am unable to include your responses to my previous posts due to character limit (limit is 20000 characters, and I was at 34685 characters, so I have to exclude your responses in post #85 in order to be able to get my post to go through. So, refer to your post #85 for all of what I have written in this post.
When I was 12 years old, I learned about the relay system for the very first time. This was at my state school for the Deaf. The relay company came to our school and explained to us how relay works, how they do it, and how they make our calls work similar as much as possible, to treat the calls as if we were hearing, etc. They told us that it was the purpose of their relay system. That is what I learned. I am simply going by what I have learned. I did not know it has changed. I apologize.
I have
NOT implied that they are racist assholes, nor have I said anything about racism.
I am sorry if I sound like an "entitlement bitch", but I am just simply very very very frustrated with how most of my relay calls goes. I get very upset if I get hung up on by a hearing person in the middle of a
very important call (and, YES, it is often an important call. If it's not an important call, I use VP. If it's important, I use IP Relay). I get frustrated with this because usually it's because I have had been on hold for over 20 minutes, and then I finally get a live person on the line. And it's a call that is actually very important, an example would be a phone call to Medical Transportation Program to arrange a ride to a very important medical appointment (I have many health problems), and such calls as this, I am often on hold for over 20 minutes, many times up to an hour. Then if the relay operator has to switch operators while I am in the middle of this very important call, many times, the hearing person on the other end gets confused and does not understand, and ends up hanging up on me. That gets me very upset, because then I have to call back, be put on hold for ANOTHER 20 minutes to even an hour, and then finally get another live person on the line, to finally arrange a ride. This particular place I call, I don't always get through. Half the time, they just ring and ring and ring and ring, and then they disconnect. So, if I get hung up, I get very upset because I worry that I may not be lucky to get through again. Sometimes I don't even get through at all. Then, I don't even get a ride to my medical appointment, I have to cancel and reschedule my appointment and have to wait another two months to see the doctors because they are booked up to two months in advance, such as my neurologist. I can't see my neurologist until February. I am not trying to be mean to you or other relay operators, but I am very frustrated with how things goes. I really really really despise being hung up on such important calls as this one. It's not simple. I can't just simply redial, wait only 5 minutes on hold, and then get a live person on the line, and arrange a ride right away. I call, get a long recording, and then I have to press certain numbers for such as #1 for Spanish, #2 for English, and then I get another long recording, and then I have to press #1 if I want to speak to a supervisor, and #2 if I want to arrange a ride. Then I get another long recording again, and then I have to press #1 for Medicaid patients 21 and under, #2 for patients over 21 years old. Then I get put on hold for 20 minutes or longer, even up to an hour. Then I finally get a live person, and I have to give her/him my Medicaid ID number, and then I have to tell him/her my full name, my address, and if I use a wheelchair, walker, or cane or not (this information is important so that they know which driver and which vehicle to use for me (they use either a car, a van, or a bus, and not all of them are ADA accessible/compliant). Then I have to tell her/him my doctor's name, phone number, and address of the doctor's office, and I have to tell her/him the date and time of the appointment. Then I have to make her/her verify MY address and the doctor's address (they have made many mistakes in the past and have come to the wrong address and therefore I miss my doctor's appt or they take me to the wrong place!) and then she/he has to give me the confirmation number. Then when I am done arranging all my rides that I have for the whole month (I can only arrange rides up to a month in advance, their policy, not mine). It's not very simple and easy as I wish it was. It's not. It's extremely frustrating. I could use VP, but the reason I use IP Relay is because of all the information that I have to fingerspell (names, addresses, etc). On VP, I am repeatedly asked to repeat what I just said when I fingerspell, even if I do slowly, and I do not have the best ASL skills. For calls such as this, I like to use IP Relay so I can use straight English for all this.
Bend My Ear, I am sorry if you feel that I have been rude/mean to you. I truly am sorry. I am just talking about all the problems that I have experienced with relay calls. I am not doing this to treat you or other operators like shit. I just want to mention and talk about my problems that I have experienced with relay calls, that is all. I know that from your POV, it sounded cruel, rude, and mean. I am sorry. I thought I had the right to talk about all the problems that I have experienced with relay calls? I guess not. I truly want to find ways to improve my relay call experiences so that I can use it for my important calls. That's all. I do not want you to leave. I do like you. You are a good person. I know I come across as mean, and I am sorry. I just have been very frustrated that such calls as what I have just talked about goes. It truly is very frustrating.
I am not trying to treat you like a dog. It's just very frustrating that when the relay operators switch operators, and I get hung up cause the hearing person on the other end gets confused and hangs up, and then I have to call back, and it's not always a simple process. A lot of times it's complicated, like the particular call I just mentioned. I am not doing it to be mean. I just really would appreciate it if the operators does not do that when I am on the phone with a hearing person on the other end. If you need/want to switch operators while I am on hold, that is fine. But when I am actually SPEAKING to the hearing person on the other end, I don't want that hearing person to get confused and hang up on me because you switch operators. I am not saying it's your fault. It is NOT your fault. It's just that the hearing person is not familiar with how relay works, and many times when I call that particular place I have just mentioned, I get a hearing person that has NEVER has ever had a relay call ever in his/her whole life, and it is his/her very first time. It's very frustrating to get hung up when this is a very important call and I have been on hold for ridiculous lengths of times. Again, no, I do not think it is your fault, nor your relay company's fault, or any other operator's fault. It's just that switching operators in the middle of me actually speaking to the hearing person on the other end does not work out very well at all. If you or another relay operator could wait til I have finished speaking to that particular person I am speaking to, and then go ahead and switch operators before I ask to make another call to another hearing person, I would totally, completely, and gratefully appreciate it so much. Seriously, I would. Really. I am not doing this to treat you or other relay operators as slaves. I just really would like for the call to go well, and not to be hung up on due to confusion. It is NO ONE'S fault, but it just doesn't work out very well, that's all. I'm sorry if this sounds mean, but it's true.
I truly wish I didn't have to use the relay system at all, but I have no choice. I have to, for those kinds of calls, because it just does not work out very well on VP. I have tried before and it is hard. This is one of the things I hate about being Deaf. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate being Deaf, it's just that this is one of the few things I experience due to being Deaf, and it's what I really hate. Most of the time, I do enjoy being Deaf, I love the Deaf culture and everything. But I have to admit, it does get very frustrating at times.
Bend My Ear, I understand what it is like to have to go to the bathroom while on the phone. I have frequent kidney infections, and in order to avoid them, I have to go to the bathroom immediately if I can. But on these kind of calls that I just mentioned, I can't. I have to wait, too. I don't like it, either. If I go to the bathroom in the middle of such a call, I lose the call. That particular call I just mentioned, it can often take up to about two hours. Really. I'm not kidding.
It IS often EXTREMELY IMPORTANT, such as the kind of phone call I have just mentioned in this post. It's not that the hearing person on the other end thinks it's not important. It's that the hearing person often got confused since he or she has never ever had a relay call ever in his/her whole life. THAT is the problem.
And yes, I have spoken to their supervisors about this so many times, but I still experience this. It really does suck. And again, no, it is no one's fault. It's just that this is a problem that really does need to be solved.
I have never said that you are the ones who make the judgement calls about the importance of one call over an other. I never said such a thing.
I would like to and I would NOT mind waiting when you exchange operators, it's just that when you exchange operators, many times it does not work out very well and the hearing person on the other end often gets confused, goes "WTF" and then hangs up on me. If I didn't get hung up on so many times when you or another relay operator switch operators, then this wouldn't be so frustrating and it wouldn't be such a problem for me. Honestly, if the hearing person wouldn't get confused and hang up on me so many times, I wouldn't have an issue with you switching operators. I would happily say "go ahead" and wait patiently while I wait for the new operator. I just really wish the hearing person wouldn't get confused and hang up on me. I am sorry I came across as mean before. I apologize.
Many important calls as I have just mentioned in this post, I can't just simply hang up and then call back. It's not that simple for me. Really, I wish it was that simple, but it's not.
I can't even work, due to my health problems including my VERY frequent bathroom use.
Again, I apologize for coming across as rude and insensitive.
I am NOT generalizing any group of people. What I am saying is that I have so many similar experiences with so many relay operators on so many similar relay calls, not just one operator, and not just one relay call.
And, I have NEVER said anything regarding racism, or race, or anything, about any relay operators. Nor have I accused you of being racist or any such thing. Plus, I am NOT white. I am Cherokee.
I have explained those kinds of things to the hearing person on the other end so many times. MANY TIMES. And, no, I do not think it is your fault. I am just simply talking about those frustrating times, that is all. Is that not my right? Do I not have the right to talk about this, about how frustrating it is when those things happen, to discuss this, to find out how to improve how my relay calls goes, etc? I am sorry and I apologize again, and again, for coming across as a jackass. Sorry.
Yes. It really is very frustrating to be hung up on someone over and over again, especially on a very important call as the kind I have just mentioned in this post.
I have never talked down to a relay operator. Ever. Except for that one relay operator who called me stupid, and for that operator, I do have the right to complain to the supervisor about that relay operator. It is wrong to call a Deaf person, especially the whole Deaf community, stupid. Are you saying that she was right to call me stupid because I asked her to please (and I asked very nicely and very politely) redial a couple more times? I thought I was allowed to ask a relay operator to please redial? Have you read what I said about my HOH friend who can and can not hear the phone ring depending on where she is in the house? She often walks around the house frequently, and more than half the time she passes an area where she can hear the phone ring. She actually has asked me to redial at least two more times before I hang up and try again in another half an hour. I respect her wishes. Is that really so unreasonable?
I have NEVER asked or told any relay supervisor to fire the relay operator for no reason. I didn't even talk to the supervisor of the operator who called me and the entire Deaf community stupid. I did ask to speak to the supervisor, and then the operator profusely apologized, so I did end up
not even speaking to the supervisor at all in that particular call.
It sounds like you work for a really good relay company. I would love to know the name and the phone number of your relay company, so I can use your company for all of my relay calls. If you can't say in your post here on the forum, you can PM me. If you can't even tell me in PM, that is okay, I respect and accept that.
Yes. It is really infuriating especially in this kind of call I mentioned in this post. And, I've been called "sir" so many times. I have asked the hearing person on the other end VERY NICELY to PLEASE stop calling me "sir" and I have EXPLAINED to him/her that I am actually a female and that I am talking to him/her using a male relay operator as an interpreter. If being called "sir" over and over and over again even after being asked SEVERAL times to please stop calling me "sir" didn't happen so often, I wouldn't be bothered at all. I don't mind the occasional mistake. But if I've already explained to him or her, and he or she keeps it up after being asked up to even five times PLEASE not to do that, I am going to get annoyed and frustrated.
Uh. I have not accused any relay operator of lying. Which post in which did I accuse the relay operator of lying? Please show it to me. I also have not said any such things as calling them dimwits or stupid or any such names. I do not think relay operators are stupid at all.
There is only ONE other avenue for me (I am completely Deaf) to make a phone call, and that is the VP. I can only use the VP for casual calls such as talking to friends or family. But when I have an important call in which I have to give out names, addresses, phone numbers, and any other information that do not have signs for them (yes, I do have a name sign for my name, but the VRS interpreter is not going to know my name since he/she does not know me and has NEVER met me before. I can't expect him/her to know my name sign automatically. And I have been often asked to fingerspell such things repeatedly (My ASL skills are NOT the best).
That's awesome that you do type this fast. Really, it is so awesome.
Does the hearing people often speak so slowly on the phone, as slowly as I have said that the relay operators often type that slowly? Really? I really wish I could HEAR the hearing person speak, and find out. I do have a cochlear implant, but I only got it two years ago, and therefore, I can only understand environmental sounds and listen to music (which I do not even understand the lyrics to). Seriously. I have seen hearing people pick up the phone to talk to a friend or a family member or whatever, and it doesn't take so long, I have seen them call a friend to make an arrangement to meet for lunch, and it only takes 3 minutes. I am not saying that you are lying. It's just that this is what I have SEEN. I only know what I have seen and experienced, that's all. I am not accusing you of anything.
I never said that I know what it is like to be a relay operator, because I truly don't, to be honest. I would love to learn. Really.
And, even though you think I am an "entitlement bitch" (no, I am not saying that you said that, but you probably think that, and no, I am not even accusing you of thinking that, but, I said "probably"), I really am 100% grateful for all the relay operators in this entire country who does this job. Really. Without any of you, I would be depending on a hearing friend or family member to make all my phone calls that are to a hearing person for me, and I TOTALLY hate having to depend on any friend or family member for anything. I like to be as independent as possible, and you and all the other hearing operators have made that possible. I am so very grateful and thankful for that, even if I do not sound like that. I know that I often come across as an asshole, a bitch, whatever, but that is just how I speak and write. It doesn't mean I hate you or I am not grateful or I don't care or whatever.
I am really totally grateful for operators like you who do those things for us. And no, I would not and I will not ask you to tell me what it was, because I respect that you are not at liberty to say, and I do not want you to lose your job because of me. And, I do want to say, THANK YOU, to you and ALL the other relay operators.
Again, I am sorry I come across as an "entitlement bitch". Sometimes, I have to be, in order for things I need to happen, to happen. Most of the time, I am EXTREMELY nice and polite, to both the relay operators and the hearing persons on the other end of the phone line. But, there are times that I have to change my attitude and be a bitch to make things go the way they need to go, or otherwise they don't happen at all. I don't like doing this at all, so I try not to do that as much as possible. But sometimes, I do NOT have a choice. I wish I didn't have to, but I have to sometimes. I am sorry.
We have the right to complain, just like you hearing people have the right to complain. EVERYONE has a right to complain, even you have the right to complain about me. If I don't complain, nothing gets done, nothing gets fixed. That is the whole purpose of complaining. It's not just whining. It's telling someone that this needs to be taken care of, to be fixed, or to happen. I am not putting down the service that you work for. I am complaining about how the relay system in general works, how well it works, how awful it works, etc. If I say nothing, nothing gets fixed or taken care of or whatever. It is necessary to complain at times.
I, too, thank you, AND welcome you, for coming on AllDeaf and talking about your job and the relay system and how it works. I appreciate it. Really. Even if it doesn't sound like I appreciate it. And, I would love to learn everything there is about the entire relay system.
With all that said, I would like for you to stay and continue posting on AllDeaf. I enjoy your posts, and all your posts are beneficial to all of us. I do not want you to leave, even if I sound like I hate you or I want you to leave or anything like that. I do not want you to leave just because of me. If you do not like anything I say, you are more than welcome to put me on ignore. We do have that feature here on AllDeaf. Please don't go. I do not hate you at all. I just don't like how many of my relay calls have worked out for many reasons such as misunderstanding, confusion, frustration, etc. I am sorry if you feel that I am taking it all on YOU. It may sound like it, but I am not taking it out on you. I am just frustrated, and I just wanted to tell you and the other relay operators here on AllDeaf the problems that I have experienced with the relay system and the relay calls.
Thank you so much for doing your job.
Take care and have a good night and I hope you sleep well.