contradica
New Member
- Joined
- Apr 8, 2007
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Here I am!! A fully functional female cyborg! 
Here is the low down!! 
Jennifer my audi hooked me up to the computer and then told me to get rid of my hearing aid, literally. She had no trouble finding the secret spot where the magnet was. I can hardly feel it! She changed it to a number 2 magnet because of my hair and so far so good. She started the process of activating my brand spanking new Harmony processor with Fidelity 120 with extended lows. Sounds hot right? Right off the bat, she starts raising the volume on all 16 electrodes at once until I reached a comfortable level. Jennifer's voice had an echo. I could hear the sounds of her speech but for the life of me I couldn't make out what she said. It sounded terrible It sounded like all the munchkins from Oz were rounded up, forced to smoke a joint, and placed in a tin can with helium. I could hear myself but everyone said that I was talking softer then normal. I talk soft to begin with! Jennifer decided to create a second map based on the response from each electrode. The overall volume was louder then the first map. However, the same high as hell munchkins in the tin can breathing helium was there. Jennifer created a third map from the electrical response of the electrodes. It produced the same pot smoking munchkins in a tin can passing around a deflated balloon with helium. All three programs are 50/50 T-Mic and auxiliary microphone.
Since all 16 electrodes were turned on, I have experienced no twitching. That is a plus! I was dropping components and banging on the table to see what kind of noises I could hear. It sounded like dull thuds. Once she unhooked me and I was officially on my own, I heard the sound of speech. I heard my mom zip and unzip her purse. I heard someone talking but nobody in the room was flapping their gums. Turns out it was none other then the good doctor, Dr. Bigelow standing right outside the door. He popped his head in to say hello. Jennifer showed me how to operate my sexy little Harmony processor and all the other gadgets and gizmos that come along with it. She sent me on my merry little way and I will be back to see her next Monday, same time!
I left the office, paid my valet parking fee, and patiently waited outside for my truck to come. I was hearing speech noises coming from all over the place. I did not hear cars. I heard a bus roar on by that sounded semi normal. A fire truck complete with lights and sirens came to visit the front of the building. I could not hear the sirens until the truck was within birds eye view. The next sound I thought I would be able to hear but did not. A HELICOPTER practically landed right on top of my head and I could not hear that! I felt it for sure because this girl got the worst case of wind blown hair. I looked like I came right off a Harley. Yikes! Then Mom and Philly started the third degree about how soft spoken I was. So if I feel like I am screaming, I'm fine.
My truck finally arrives in one piece. I get into the drivers seat, the valet shuts my door, and I nearly jumped out of my stilettos! It scared the hell out of me. It has a different sound then before. My blinker is SOOO loud. No wonder why people hate when I leave it on. I am picking up strange sounds and not hearing the obvious. On the ride home, I seem to notice that sounds were getting softer, so I turned up the volume. I started to tell when Philly was talking in the backseat, although I could not make out what she was saying. I decided to turn my hearing aid on for safety reason riding in the car. Philly's voice normalized for a sentence or two. I was taken aback by that. I was able to differentiate when my Mom and Philly talked. 
I got home around 7:30, removed my hearing aid, and declared myself exhausted. Thank Aunt Jemimah that I did not have to go back to work because I would have been as useless as teats on a bull. I have already noticed an improvement from when I was first turned on to now. I made myself some soup for dinner and I heard the dial turn on and off the stove. I heard the pot grate against the grill. I started banging my spoon around in my pan. My sexy little Harmony is going crazy when I start typing on my keyboard a mile a minute! I have the TV on but I cannot hear a darn thing. Sitting on my ear here is some crazy technology. Nothing sounds normal and I don't care!! I'm not giving up!!!
My blog has more detail if you all would like to pay a visit or two. Perhaps drop a comment or three.
Here is the low down!! Jennifer my audi hooked me up to the computer and then told me to get rid of my hearing aid, literally. She had no trouble finding the secret spot where the magnet was. I can hardly feel it! She changed it to a number 2 magnet because of my hair and so far so good. She started the process of activating my brand spanking new Harmony processor with Fidelity 120 with extended lows. Sounds hot right?
Right off the bat, she starts raising the volume on all 16 electrodes at once until I reached a comfortable level. Jennifer's voice had an echo. I could hear the sounds of her speech but for the life of me I couldn't make out what she said. It sounded terrible It sounded like all the munchkins from Oz were rounded up, forced to smoke a joint, and placed in a tin can with helium. I could hear myself but everyone said that I was talking softer then normal. I talk soft to begin with! Jennifer decided to create a second map based on the response from each electrode. The overall volume was louder then the first map. However, the same high as hell munchkins in the tin can breathing helium was there. Jennifer created a third map from the electrical response of the electrodes. It produced the same pot smoking munchkins in a tin can passing around a deflated balloon with helium. All three programs are 50/50 T-Mic and auxiliary microphone. Since all 16 electrodes were turned on, I have experienced no twitching. That is a plus! I was dropping components and banging on the table to see what kind of noises I could hear. It sounded like dull thuds. Once she unhooked me and I was officially on my own, I heard the sound of speech. I heard my mom zip and unzip her purse. I heard someone talking but nobody in the room was flapping their gums. Turns out it was none other then the good doctor, Dr. Bigelow standing right outside the door. He popped his head in to say hello. Jennifer showed me how to operate my sexy little Harmony processor and all the other gadgets and gizmos that come along with it. She sent me on my merry little way and I will be back to see her next Monday, same time!
I left the office, paid my valet parking fee, and patiently waited outside for my truck to come. I was hearing speech noises coming from all over the place. I did not hear cars. I heard a bus roar on by that sounded semi normal. A fire truck complete with lights and sirens came to visit the front of the building. I could not hear the sirens until the truck was within birds eye view. The next sound I thought I would be able to hear but did not. A HELICOPTER practically landed right on top of my head and I could not hear that! I felt it for sure because this girl got the worst case of wind blown hair. I looked like I came right off a Harley. Yikes! Then Mom and Philly started the third degree about how soft spoken I was. So if I feel like I am screaming, I'm fine.
My truck finally arrives in one piece. I get into the drivers seat, the valet shuts my door, and I nearly jumped out of my stilettos! It scared the hell out of me. It has a different sound then before. My blinker is SOOO loud. No wonder why people hate when I leave it on.
I am picking up strange sounds and not hearing the obvious. On the ride home, I seem to notice that sounds were getting softer, so I turned up the volume. I started to tell when Philly was talking in the backseat, although I could not make out what she was saying. I decided to turn my hearing aid on for safety reason riding in the car. Philly's voice normalized for a sentence or two. I was taken aback by that. I was able to differentiate when my Mom and Philly talked. I got home around 7:30, removed my hearing aid, and declared myself exhausted. Thank Aunt Jemimah that I did not have to go back to work because I would have been as useless as teats on a bull. I have already noticed an improvement from when I was first turned on to now. I made myself some soup for dinner and I heard the dial turn on and off the stove. I heard the pot grate against the grill. I started banging my spoon around in my pan. My sexy little Harmony is going crazy when I start typing on my keyboard a mile a minute! I have the TV on but I cannot hear a darn thing. Sitting on my ear here is some crazy technology. Nothing sounds normal and I don't care!!
I'm not giving up!!! My blog has more detail if you all would like to pay a visit or two. Perhaps drop a comment or three.
we activated!! 
How does the direct connect sound?