Whether to consider hearing aids/cochlear

Would you prefer that a child have the option to try hearing aids/cochlear implants?

  • Yes - hearing aids

    Votes: 2 25.0%
  • Yes - cochlear implants

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Yes - both

    Votes: 6 75.0%
  • No

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    8

Tim Truett

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My five year-old daughter has no hearing in one ear and less than 10% in the other. She was born hearing, but exposure to the CMV virus in utero has resulted in her gradually losing her hearing. She will be starting at a school for the deaf and heard of hearing next week.

My ex-wife is refusing to even let her be evaluated for hearing aids and whether a cochlear would be something that might work for her. I want to at least know if these are option for her. My ex-wife assures me that the deaf community is almost entirely against the use of cochlear implants. I would like to know how others on this forum feel. And if any of you have children with cochlears (or if you have them yourselves) what has been the experience with the cochlear?

I am certainly in favor of my daughter and the rest of us becoming fluent in ASL regardless of whether she ended up with hearing aids or a cochlear, but my ex is completely inflexible on the issue.
 
You both need to find a support group and go, A lot of very helpful info and knowledge you will have when you leave, may change her mind.
 
My five year-old daughter has no hearing in one ear and less than 10% in the other. She was born hearing, but exposure to the CMV virus in utero has resulted in her gradually losing her hearing. She will be starting at a school for the deaf and heard of hearing next week.

My ex-wife is refusing to even let her be evaluated for hearing aids and whether a cochlear would be something that might work for her. I want to at least know if these are option for her. My ex-wife assures me that the deaf community is almost entirely against the use of cochlear implants. I would like to know how others on this forum feel. And if any of you have children with cochlears (or if you have them yourselves) what has been the experience with the cochlear?

I am certainly in favor of my daughter and the rest of us becoming fluent in ASL regardless of whether she ended up with hearing aids or a cochlear, but my ex is completely inflexible on the issue.
To me, giving a cochlear implant, or hearing aids is adding more, never taking away. Why would you want to close a door that could be useful for your child? But, if the child is already 5 and has never used devices, the door for using hearing is closing fast. It is unlikely that your child (profoundly deaf since birth) would use a hearing device to obtain language through listening. That being said, I still think it would be very useful and what will you say to your adult child if they come to you and say, "Why didn't you let me learn to hear and speak when I could have?"
 
To me, giving a cochlear implant, or hearing aids is adding more, never taking away. Why would you want to close a door that could be useful for your child? But, if the child is already 5 and has never used devices, the door for using hearing is closing fast. It is unlikely that your child (profoundly deaf since birth) would use a hearing device to obtain language through listening. That being said, I still think it would be very useful and what will you say to your adult child if they come to you and say, "Why didn't you let me learn to hear and speak when I could have?"

My daughter has not been deaf from birth. She has gradually lost her hearing. She used to sing songs back from TV shows and emulate certain words. I started to suspect she was having problems with her hearing because she would not turn around to respond to you if you said something to her when she was looking away. I tested her though and she would respond to louder sounds so that's when we took her to an ENT. She had lots of fluid in her ears, but she had a cold at the time so we thought it might be related to her being sick. The cold went away but the fluid did not over six months and the ENT advised she would probably not be able to hear very much with that amount of fluid in the ears so she had tubes placed to drain the fluid. We were hopeful that this was the reason for her hearing reduction, but after the tubes were placed, they did the hearing test and discovered her hearing was almost totally gone regardless of the fluid or not.
 
My daughter has not been deaf from birth. She has gradually lost her hearing. She used to sing songs back from TV shows and emulate certain words. I started to suspect she was having problems with her hearing because she would not turn around to respond to you if you said something to her when she was looking away. I tested her though and she would respond to louder sounds so that's when we took her to an ENT. She had lots of fluid in her ears, but she had a cold at the time so we thought it might be related to her being sick. The cold went away but the fluid did not over six months and the ENT advised she would probably not be able to hear very much with that amount of fluid in the ears so she had tubes placed to drain the fluid. We were hopeful that this was the reason for her hearing reduction, but after the tubes were placed, they did the hearing test and discovered her hearing was almost totally gone regardless of the fluid or not.
Well, then I would encourage you even more to seek out hearing assistance! This is a child who had spoken language and hearing. Her brain is primed for audition. I do not understand why someone would want to deny their child something they had, and valued, and then lost. What is your ex-wife's reasoning for denying your child sound through technology?
 
Well, then I would encourage you even more to seek out hearing assistance! This is a child who had spoken language and hearing. Her brain is primed for audition. I do not understand why someone would want to deny their child something they had, and valued, and then lost. What is your ex-wife's reasoning for denying your child sound through technology?

She keeps telling me she has talked with hundreds of deaf people and the vast majority of them tell her that the deaf community Temptation people with Cochlear implants because they want to embrace a lifestyle that doesn't look Stephanie says being a disability. She says that it's a cultural preference that all the deaf people she knows are not in favor of Cochlear implants or hearing aids.
 
Then she should probably also talk to hundreds of people with hearing aids or cochlear implants who are involved in the hearing world, or in both hearing and deaf worlds.

I can't speak for the US, but in my country it's like this: there is a small, but sometimes pretty loud group which is against CIs and then there is the majority of deaf people who don't really care what others use or don't use, even if they don't want CIs themselves. And then there is a small group of deaf parents who have implanted kids. I have a few friends with hearing aids or cochlear implants who can communicate in spoken language, but know sign language and are a part of the deaf community too. Then I have friends who are fully integrated in the hearing world, but enjoy meetings with other CI users.

Your daughter wouldn't have to be dependent on the deaf community - if she gets HAs or CIs, the whole world is open for her. She can choose if she wants to be part of the hearing world or the deaf world or be in both worlds.
I don't understand your ex-wife's point of view. It's almost like if she went to a vegetarian club to ask what kind of meat they prefer.
Did she think about the family? Will grandparents, aunts or cousins get sufficient sign language knowledge to communicate with your daughter about everything?
 
She keeps telling me she has talked with hundreds of deaf people and the vast majority of them tell her that the deaf community Temptation people with Cochlear implants because they want to embrace a lifestyle that doesn't look Stephanie says being a disability. She says that it's a cultural preference that all the deaf people she knows are not in favor of Cochlear implants or hearing aids.
The Deaf are againsts it because, well, theyre Deaf.... You are a hearing family and cochlear would keep that door open, even if she wants to be deaf, she will have both worlds to indulge into with just a flick.... I go deaf as well a hear when I want. I love music then I hate nagging people... I have the best of both worlds at my disposal.
 
She keeps telling me she has talked with hundreds of deaf people and the vast majority of them tell her that the deaf community Temptation people with Cochlear implants because they want to embrace a lifestyle that doesn't look Stephanie says being a disability. She says that it's a cultural preference that all the deaf people she knows are not in favor of Cochlear implants or hearing aids.
Again, seek out a support group and go talk... You will talk to some culterally deaf and they will have a very positive experience to share. Those she probly talked to are under pressure and being negative due to their little tight wad community. A support group will open those opportunities where everyone is on a level playing field.
 
Most important things is doing what is best for your child. Others opinions are just that opinions.
 
Most important things is doing what is best for your child. Others opinions are just that opinions.

But those opinions can help you think of different things to do that you might not have without the input of those opinions.
 
I'm not sure how she's getting to hundreds of deaf people against the CI... at least not in one area like Phoenix. Maybe on the internet but even then I would say that it's a challenge to find HUNDREDS of people. There will always be d/Deaf who do not like technological advances or want to use hearing aids or cochlear implants but seems to me in general there is less and less opposition to it as the years go by as deaf start to realize that no... not even with CI ..the deaf community will not die and go away (as much as the extremists on the other side would like it to).

Not a bad idea to explore but sometimes hearing aids and CIs may not be a benefit either depending on the type of loss/damage or when (more so the kind and how the damage was done than age since your daughter had something before the age of 5 and it sounds like it was good before the age of 2.

Phoenix is a great area- I miss it a lot even though I only lived there 6 months so never had a chance to find a deaf community (had a job there... I'm back to looking for work again...).
 
What does being "dependent" on the Deaf community even MEAN?!?!? Is a Spanish/French/Somali/Arabic/fill in the blank with whatever minority language speaker "dependent" on an interpreter? Maybe use a better term/word?

Well, sorry, English is not my mother tongue, so yeah, I might sometimes choose wrong words. I meant that without any hearing input it's very likely that she would be fully involved in the deaf community only and her ability to communicate with the hearing world could be more limited than it would be with hearing aids or implants.
Example: my friend (she has a CI) works in a company and they were so satisfied with ther that they asked her if she could recommend another hearing impaired person for accounting department. She found an young woman who has a CI as well, but is very involved in the deaf community, so she doesn't use her CI very often. When she came for an interview, she came without her CI and had big issues with understanding her future boss just with lipreading (noone in the company knows sign language). Next time she came with her CI and she could communicate with the hearing people just fine. They are very satisfied with her, but she has to use her CI to be able to communicate with her colleagues. So that's the point. So that's the point. Without any hearing you can be fine in the deaf community, but it can bring some troubles when you need something in the hearing world. With a HA/CI you can still be a part of deaf community, but at the same time you can be also a part of the hearing world.
 
My apologies for being rough on you.
I just wonder, though, if your daughter's age qualifies her to make good decisions? I mean, what does she want? (Sorry, I am the first to admit I am no psychologist!)
 
Well, sorry, English is not my mother tongue, so yeah, I might sometimes choose wrong words. I meant that without any hearing input it's very likely that she would be fully involved in the deaf community only and her ability to communicate with the hearing world could be more limited than it would be with hearing aids or implants.
Example: my friend (she has a CI) works in a company and they were so satisfied with ther that they asked her if she could recommend another hearing impaired person for accounting department. She found an young woman who has a CI as well, but is very involved in the deaf community, so she doesn't use her CI very often. When she came for an interview, she came without her CI and had big issues with understanding her future boss just with lipreading (noone in the company knows sign language). Next time she came with her CI and she could communicate with the hearing people just fine. They are very satisfied with her, but she has to use her CI to be able to communicate with her colleagues. So that's the point. So that's the point. Without any hearing you can be fine in the deaf community, but it can bring some troubles when you need something in the hearing world. With a HA/CI you can still be a part of deaf community, but at the same time you can be also a part of the hearing world.
Thats exactly what Ive said, the best of both worlds.
There are new regulations with insurance companies and medicare.... and this is VERY important NOW.
Since the changes to the medical structure, If youre going to implant your child , DO IT NOW, because children qualify for Bi-lateral implants still where once you are an adult they will only pay/approve for one (1) I was lucky and got mine just as this was all getting approved and both were covered. Now if you follow the CI world, adults are only getting approved for 1 implant and complaining they cant become bi-lateral unless they pay 100% out of their pockest for the second one. Just something to think about if you decide to do so as the benefits are greater now.
 
My ex and I both live in the Phoenix area.
Ooooo! PHoenix Day School for the Deaf? But yeah, that's weird b/c Arizona isn't hardcore about CIs. At most schools and programs for the Deaf, you'll see a lot of kids with CIs
 
My apologies for being rough on you.
I just wonder, though, if your daughter's age qualifies her to make good decisions? I mean, what does she want? (Sorry, I am the first to admit I am no psychologist!)
Well I think a five year old CAN help make those types of decisions. It shouldn't be her exclusive decision, but she should have some input at least.
 
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