What is the funniest thing you ever saw/heard?

MorriganTait

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Once I was at a McDonalds with friends in High School. Somehow, a neighborhood stray dog got into the McDonalds and was running around.

Just then, my friend Larry jumped up and yelled, "Hey! The Chicken McNuggets got loose!"

It has been decades since this happened and I still cannot think of this without laughing. It is the funniest thing I ever heard someone say spontaneously.

How about you?
 
i always end up being in the middle of these things... i was watching the sandlot with my friend angela and her little brother johnny and i was like "omg all this time i thought ham was saying the big bambeano not the the big bambino" and angela paused for a second and she was like " you know big bambeano sounds like something you get at taco bell" and then she imatates some ordering their food and shes like " uh yes i'd like one big bambeano with my large coke" me and johnny were laughing ..this was back in 03
 
Oh mannn, don't get me started--! So much humor and so little time and all that, lol.
Mine was when I was a teenager staying a few days with this family. They had a little girl they coached to say something to her dying grandfather in the hospital. We all went there to visit and I watched from the back. The Grandfather pulled the girl up close and said, "I am at Death's door."
God bless her, she said, "I hope they pull you through."
It was one of those rare times I lipread everything perfectly.
I started laughing and lost it.
 
A club I'm involved with back home (the link in my sig) has a whole section in our forum just for funny quotes that we catch each other saying. This one is probably my favorite:

"If someone you dig ever pours chocolate sauce on some part of their body that you'd like to lick... don't be a good mannered person and let someone else do it... just dive right in."


I love my friends. :)

A more recent one was during a staff meeting at my work. We were talking about how to implement suicide prevention techniques, and our training person said, "We're a very suicide-friendly environment. (pauses) Wait... that's what I meant. Suicide prevention friendly! Don't be suicide friendly, we don't want that!" :mrgreen:
 
heres some more funny stories

when i was little my friend next door had a pool and she told me she thinks someone with blonde hair has been swimming in her pool because she found a blonde strand. So she went all detective on it ,and found out later that day it was barbie who was swimming in her pool lol... stil makes me laugh til this day.

one saturday morning when me and brother were younger we were bored so we tied a rope to my stuffed murky from rainbow brite and he was like "on the count of three yell bungee " and he counted to three and we yelled bungee while he held on the end of the rope as we watch murky bungee off my window.. i think we did that like 10 or more times. i wouldn't be suprised if we woke up our neighbors.


one weekend i was searching for my trolls i had to be 9 or so and i found them all mascured in my backyard with pieces of their asses all over the yard. My brother shot them assless with his bb gun. my pink haired one survived and i hid it from my brother , and till this day i can't find it.....it was so sad ,but so funny when i think about it.
 
And I like this one---"Thank God I'm an atheist."
 
Beowulf said:
And I like this one---"Thank God I'm an atheist."
haha that doesn't even make sense... since athiest don't believe in god and all.
 
ohh man.. too many...

once, long time ago, my dad had these candies, werthers and well, as he picked up one, dad said, Ohh look, I found a werther, then my mom grabbed it out of his hand and put it in her mouth, he found another one, but my brother took it this time, then he took another one out, and i took it, he said oh great, now who is going to get it next? Duchess? (the dog), he found another one, and Duchess came up and took the candy out of his hand.

hmm ohh... once when i was lightheaded, i told my mom, "I am high-headed, I mean light-headed"

i cant think of anymore, if i think of more i will add them ..
 
Thougt babies came from grocery brown bag and told everyone that, when I was 5 years old or older.... *smh*
 
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