What is a polite way to get a deaf/hoh person's attention?

statistically, the most proven, fail-safe methods of garnering attention are the "zap 'em with a cattle prod" and "shoot 'em with a 250,000 volt stun gun" techniques. however, these methods have waned in recent years after studies showed that the users of such devices were marginally more likely to acquire erectile dysfunction and/or enlarged prostate with age. protests by the deaf community over being inhumanely beat and electrocuted like animals were largely ignored for decades, as Deaf Prods and Deaf Stun Gun sales soared in Wal-marts the entire nation over, where consumers could purchase the devices for the low, low Rolled-Back(tm) price of $14.88.

:slap:

That would be a :nono:

Nice sales pitch though!:giggle:
 
yeah but....but....just look at the savings!

i'll bet you're tempted to buy one just for yourself. why? JUST BECAUSE IT'S ONLY $14.88.
 
QUOTE=August;952617]statistically, the most proven, fail-safe methods of garnering attention are the "zap 'em with a cattle prod" and "shoot 'em with a 250,000 volt stun gun" techniques. however, these methods have waned in recent years after studies showed that the users of such devices were marginally more likely to acquire erectile dysfunction and/or enlarged prostate with age. protests by the deaf community over being inhumanely beat and electrocuted like animals were largely ignored for decades, as Deaf Prods and Deaf Stun Gun sales soared in Wal-marts the entire nation over, where consumers could purchase the devices for the low, low Rolled-Back(tm) price of $14.88.[/QUOTE]


:laugh2::laugh2::laugh2: My sense of humour exactly.

Just dont try getting attention by turning the vaccum cleaner off and expecting deafie to notice........I can assure you from previous experience it does not work:giggle:
 
Personally I like walking up to one of my students who's gabbing away and standing right in front of him until he stops and turns around and gets the crap scared out of him due to my "suddenly" being there. However this is more of a "will the classroom please STFU so I can continue teaching" technique than a polite method. ;)

:giggle::giggle:
 
Gus: I was saddened to learn of your dysfunction due to too much attention.

Interpretrator: Ha ha ha, my last semesters teaching English were in the computer lab. It was fun to glide silently behind a student busy with her e-mail or enraptured in his favorite porn site. When they finally came to and saw me leaning over them like Snoopy playing vulture, thelr jump out of their skins and looks of pure terror were rewarding.

Back on topic, aside from the small waves and polite tap on the shoulder, I'd forgotten switching lights on and off. It annoys some, but I like it. I worked in a city library where it was my personal signal to go immediately to the front desk for anything from a visitor to a fire drill.
 
:laugh2::laugh2::laugh2: My sense of humour exactly.

Just dont try getting attention by turning the vaccum cleaner off and expecting deafie to notice........I can assure you from previous experience it does not work:giggle:

how about an air horn? surely if we make enough noise you'll snap out of your deafness and hear us?

p1797594p275w.jpg
 
how about an air horn? surely if we make enough noise you'll snap out of your deafness and hear us?

Ha ha ha, typical hearie philosophy: throw more volume at the problem.
 
There is actually a unspoken rule about flickering the lights. You only do that if you want the entire group to stop and look at you...never ever do that with one person unless that person is the only one in the room. Also, avoid tapping shoulder unless you have to because there are some deafies who don't react very well like when they are startled (ask the dude with the black eye what happened when he scared the jeepers out of me...oops). Try to draw that person's attention by coming in the room where the person can visually see you, if possible. Thumping on the floor - same rule as for the lights. You can also thump on the table. There are a lot of unspoken culture rules - it's more complicated than just waving and tapping on someone's shoulder. An example: two deafies are in a conversation. You wave. No one moved. It is not that they are ignoring you (usually)- they are enaged in a conversation, and it is considered rude to stop eye gaze...eventually when it is appropriate they will acknowedge you if you will wait. Most hearings don't stop there...they keep on waving or start to tap on the shoulder, etc.
 
Ha ha ha, typical hearie philosophy: throw more volume at the problem.

seriously though, an air horn would actually work. you may not hear it but you'll probably notice your hat blowing off your head and your cheeks folding back from the hurricane-force winds generated from the air horn.

plus

all the hearies in the room will have shit their pants.
 
Ha ha ha ha ha ha, the room full of dirty Depends would be worth the experiment.
 
A few years ago, a hilarious Depends ad boasted, "Tranquility . . . Not for Incontinence Alone."

Ever since, I've been listing additional applications:

"Tranquility . . . For Football Games in Double Overtime."

"Tranquility . . . For Those Extra Long Elk Hunts."

"Tranquility . . . When a Short Romantic Walk on the Beach Becomes More Promising."
 
A few years ago, a hilarious Depends ad boasted, "Tranquility . . . Not for Incontinence Alone."

Ever since, I've been listing additional applications:

"Tranquility . . . For Football Games in Double Overtime."

"Tranquility . . . For Those Extra Long Elk Hunts."

"Tranquility . . . When a Short Romantic Walk on the Beach Becomes More Promising."
I think the airlines ought to issue them to all boarding passengers, for those long delays where they keep the paying customers as hostages.
 
I think the airlines ought to issue them to all boarding passengers, for those long delays where they keep the paying customers as hostages.

Ha ha ha ha. My girlfriend is flying to Burbank on Friday. I'll Post-it this on a Depends pak for her. Thanks.
 
A few years ago, a hilarious Depends ad boasted, "Tranquility . . . Not for Incontinence Alone."

Ever since, I've been listing additional applications:

"Tranquility . . . For Football Games in Double Overtime."

"Tranquility . . . For Those Extra Long Elk Hunts."

"Tranquility . . . When a Short Romantic Walk on the Beach Becomes More Promising."
my name is John McCain and i approve of this message.
 
how about an air horn? surely if we make enough noise you'll snap out of your deafness and hear us?

p1797594p275w.jpg

Well it certainly didnt take an air horn to snap me out when I was flitting round my kitchen starkers and my 31yr old son came up behind me and whisper lightly tapped my shoudler..........no Depends to help out either Chase!!!!!

And for your info I do live alone so should be able to flit around any how I like!!!!!
 
Chase and Gus ... :popcorn:

:rofl: ... loved your witty banters! ... :rofl:
 
Well it certainly didnt take an air horn to snap me out when I was flitting round my kitchen starkers and my 31yr old son came up behind me and whisper lightly tapped my shoudler..........no Depends to help out either Chase!!!!!

When I finally figured out what "starkers" meant, I snorted coffee through my nose, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
 
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