Since You've Been Gone...

ladysolitary85

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Just wanted to start a thread for those who suffered the heartbreaks during the holidays, months or years ago. Talk about what you've been doing since your relationship ended, how it effected you.

I've been single since Oct 27th, 6 yr relationship went sour and honestly, I feel just fine now and I thought I wouldn't. Spent the holidays with family while he spent it with his "friend". Since he's been gone I feel happier, I don't feel controlled, I can be me and meet new people, the best part of all, I can breathe again. :)
 

rockin'robin

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Good to see you back around, Lady....and a positive post too...Seems DoVip suffered a breakup also. Due to the communication issue....Wishing both of you a Happy New Year!
 

deafdrummer

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Let's see... I would probably need to start another thread... Basically, I have been single all of my life. Never married.

1st relationship - over 2 months long
2nd - a single weekend
3rd - 13 months
4th - 2 months

That last one was, let's see... 5 or 6 years ago? This is a 22-year span since the beginning of the first relationship. I've gone as long as 10 years in between partners.
 

Cheetah

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Interesting, I find I don't do well being alone. I give everyone here a pat on the back for making your lives work. I was a mess between my divorce and meeting my current girlfriend. Though I suspect it had more to do with my divorce than anything. I just know I'm not good at being solitary.
 

MyNameIsNO

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i broken up with ex hearing boyfriend before christmas. bec i so sick him try make me hearing same him. now i happy single girl and free. he not make me happy bec he talk negative to me and insult too. now i not care about date bec men is idiots and so pighead, they want perfect sexy blonde model skinny girl. finish!!! they need look inside of girl heart, not physically look.
 

rockin'robin

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I'm moving out next month Robin :) Very excited to start my new life, I will be sharing a room with a friend but anything is better than the life I was living :) Would rather be in good company and in a place where I'm wanted. :)

Also, good book: BARNES & NOBLE | It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Breakup Buddy by Greg Behrendt, Broadway Books | NOOK Book (eBook)

Happy to hear it, Lady!...You'll find out that you're a much stronger woman than before....a new beginning is much anticipated for you...and wishing you everything good for the New Year...
 

RachelRene

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My friend started a blog project she is calling the "Mending Year" because 2011 seems to have been so rough for so many... and she just did the final breakup after a long messy relationship, and is focusing on the good.

I take inspiration from her, and from you, Lady! I had to end one messy relationship, and move away from another sweetheart... But I leave stronger, as Robin said, and happier. It is good to be able to take care of my needs, and myself, and not be trapped in someone else's crap.
 

ladysolitary85

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Although apparently moving soon, I still feel stronger than before. I can't wait for my new life! I've taken up hitting the gym recently, getting my butt in shape not only to look great but to FEEL better on the inside :) Been trying new hobbies, painting, recently got a Nook for x-mas yay me! but yes even though I'm still living with my ex til the end of the month (he broke the lease, lovely huh?) I have a spar room to lock myself in if I need to. I don't want him relationship-wise at all. To him, everything is my fault, I'm never listening, I don't do this that, just nit pick everything and negative about everything, I'm CHOOSING not to live my life surrounded by negativity anymore. No more controlling me, no more controlling my finances, just simply me, my world in the unknown, scary but better than the anxiety, depression, fears I face every day. I feel bad for the next person who tries to date me because theres so much reprogramming I'm still going through. At the moment, getting serious is too soon for me right now.
 

Kalima01

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I'm moving out next month Robin :) Very excited to start my new life, I will be sharing a room with a friend but anything is better than the life I was living :) Would rather be in good company and in a place where I'm wanted. :)

Also, good book: BARNES & NOBLE | It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Breakup Buddy by Greg Behrendt, Broadway Books | NOOK Book (eBook)

YAY!!! I'm so glad you got that book I recommended - how good is it?
Man all his books make me feel better because of the simple common sense we forget when our emotions run! The book makes the brain take control and put things in perspective!

I'm glad you're moving out and looking forward to the new and exciting chapter your life has coming up! So proud of you!
At least sharing with a friend eases any loneliness that may come from being single after so many yrs with someone - a way to ease back into a life for you!

All the best and keep us (me) posted :)

YAY!!!!!:h5:
 

Kalima01

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Although apparently moving soon, I still feel stronger than before. I can't wait for my new life! I've taken up hitting the gym recently, getting my butt in shape not only to look great but to FEEL better on the inside :) Been trying new hobbies, painting, recently got a Nook for x-mas yay me! but yes even though I'm still living with my ex til the end of the month (he broke the lease, lovely huh?) I have a spar room to lock myself in if I need to. I don't want him relationship-wise at all. To him, everything is my fault, I'm never listening, I don't do this that, just nit pick everything and negative about everything, I'm CHOOSING not to live my life surrounded by negativity anymore. No more controlling me, no more controlling my finances, just simply me, my world in the unknown, scary but better than the anxiety, depression, fears I face every day. I feel bad for the next person who tries to date me because theres so much reprogramming I'm still going through. At the moment, getting serious is too soon for me right now.

I'm seriously so proud of you babe!

Don't rush into anything new... Spend the time to heal and rediscover who you are and when the time is right, someone awesome will come along.

For now, have fun!

I wish I could go out and celebrate with you :)
 

ladysolitary85

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Kalima I haven't bought the book yet, but I have been taking advantage of my reading at B&N :) So far the book is awesome! I get paid this week so I'm planing on out right buying the book. Great book though! definitely makes you feel like you've got a friend by your side when your alone and upset.

I'm not going to lie, there is still a bit of hurt in me but its not the "AHHHHH I WANT HIM BACCKKKK" hurt, its just the parting with my cat mostly, his cat and my cat are buddies, I can't take him with me so I've decided not to separate the besties since its not fair to either of them. Also just afraid of change, and yet excited. I will be losing internet again, due to the lack of a computer by the end of the month, but in a few months I plan on getting one for myself so no worries I will return.
 

Miss-Delectable

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Was just thinking of you!

Glad to see you're doing alright, and making positive changes in your life.

Aww, sorry that you've had to make the difficult choice to let the cats stay with him. :(
 

ladysolitary85

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Deep down I will miss him, only the good times, and miss having a place. But eventually I will have a place of my own again. Just takes time.. and a job lol :) I really think my friend can help me grow more as I've seen her do it. The only thing that makes me nervous is I wont be on the lease, its her mom's house so I could be kicked out at anytime, legally. I doubt it will happen, her mom loves me lol.
 

ladysolitary85

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3 day weekend for me, going to do some pampering, cheers to everyone who has made it past the heartaches and moved on to their new life.
 

deafbajagal

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Relationship is like being addicted to coke. You want the rush, the good feeling, the euphoric moments, which keeps you going for more even after it leaves you feeling like shit whenit wears off. Then it gets to be you needing more, more, more to keep it up. A bad cycle. Detoxing is good for you, girl. :0)
 
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