Should the parent who is custody of child need to update the few years old case..

[MsGiglz]

Please dont bashing or flaming.. even point fingers...

It irrates me so much to see the most cases were like more than 2-3 or more years ago. The parents divorced or separated or break up couples lost the custody of child (or children) just because of made mistake at the first place but year or years later, learned the mistakes, wanted to work out or realized. the parent who have custody refused to cooperative... even didnt follow through the case what it suppose to be.. like visitations, taking parents classes and many more. Before I go on,, the mistakes are just simple not like serious domestic voilences, drugger/sent to jail, offender or unsafe place..

The nasty cases are like.. discrimations on either parents who they are,... blackmail, tell what to do, follow what he or she want you be, telling friends have to follow by or what ex or ex do...

The most tramutic for the child (or children) to go through seeing both parents arent getting along, and either parents telling child what to do or drill child to tell what he/she did at every details..

Also, paying child support is the most hard thing to do.. but the fair thing-- ex paying child support and visit the child/children or order by court.. when ex paying child support, cant ask for more money just because needed to pay other stuff only if emergency need like diapers, formula or milk and Rx ** (check the bottom of page).. the parent who have custody of child is responsible for budgeting after recieved the child support like food, day care, Rx, clothing and stuff like that.. cant demand for more.. if you want demand for more.. go court and ask for update.. because of living cost are up every year or 2 years.. I do recieved child support by child support service but not by percent that ex made every paycheck.. I dont want go through hassle with ex.. I just told judge to make decisions how much ex pay per month.. thats it.. simple.. so child support service take his pay check every two weeks to make equal amount per month as judge ordered... because I think its fair enough.. if ex or whoever wanted to make extra money for themselves.. they deserve it.. if they have 2 or 3 or more jobs but still taking 45% off each jobs pay checks, that is not fair.. ex or whoever is trying to make $ to support their families/other kids who knows.. we all need to stop and think.. its so greedy.. unless you asking for more.. go court and make it final decision by judge.. its simple..

Is that fair for a child (or children) go through that? no..

I went through similar.. It was not fair for child/children, it lead to hardship life or troubled life for them.. they would hate you when they grow up.. or have bitter with you... The most important to be fair no matter what who you are.. just between you and ex to work out on the visitations or needs.. not tell you what to do.. or fighting.. the best or better to have child to see you and ex are in calm situations.. if you want talk sh*t or negative on ex.. do-not go in front of child.. the matters of things.. important that both of you work out for the child's best interest.. make your life easier than dealing with angry or frustrated child that you have to put up with.. dont blame other parent or whoever for child's behavior.. its your responisble to keep things calm and show some love and affection between people .. ex.. I know its hard.. I HATE my ex.. but I had to be around ex... for child's sake.. i dont want see my child go through angry or emotional .. it will effecting others..

Anyway, if you or ex didnt get along or unfair or not following up.. its not fair with child.. go back to court and have things work out and do right thing.. taking turns like every other weekends visits.. and holidays rotation or school off days.. (like mine, christmas at ex.. next christmas at my place.. thanksgiving at my place.. next year thanksgiving at ex.. something like that.. but we sometimes end up have early or late christmas if kids gone to ex's place).. they still love you.. they will still love to celebrate early or late holidays, they get more treats and excitements...

**apply WIC (Parent infant children) to get formulas, milk & basic food.. also, apply food stamp for temporary if you are in need.. PLUS go to food shelf too.. I know its embarassing to go if you are in need but think about children are the greater in need..

 

[Angel]

It's all depends on the court order and what it may say on it, and sometimes child support payment isn't enough to cover everything and there may need for more money such as paying half of the doctor/denist bills and child care since both parents are responabile for their share in raise their children, it doesn't matter if the non-custody parent is paying child support since it's involved the costs of supporting the children and keeping roof over their heads etc... Since child support laws are vary from state to state, so whatever the court decides this is what the non-custody parent is responablie to pay, and IF full-custody parent refuses to allow the non-custody parent visitation with the children, then she/he will have to go back to court and go from there...

Now about the non-custody parent who made a mistake by leaving the child behind, or whatever happen to cause he/she to lose custody of the children, no matter what mistakes this parent has done in the past, it still would not be fair for the child by going back to court by fighting for full-custody, because if the child is already happy living with the full-custody parent and has been raised in the same household for years, then why ruin it for them?...If the non-custody parent want to see the children more, then she/he would have to go back to court and seek for shared custody and go from there....

The bottom line is NO parents shall put a child in the middle of anything no matter what it may be about and they should never fight or agrue in front of children either period, if two parents can't get along or work it out for their children's sakes, then the next step is to go through the court system....Both parents should do what's best for the children not for themselves....


I didn't vote cause I didn't understand your question clearly what you're really asking here, and why should the custody parent have to update it through court when they can update their incoming from the child support center....

 

[GalaxyAngel]

As for me.. *speaking in my mind to forward rest of everyone as general*

If someone whoever left the tiny baby and decide to have their own life until realized oppiSe and decide want come back and willing raise the child but look the child is bit older enough. Isn't fair for them worked hard raise their child and having without child support.. Wasting time.. my POV!
But up to the court judge made wise decision and what the best their child interest.

If someone whoever left the older child... and refuse along family matters. Sounds HUGE tough long haul road battle the court for requires the child support doesn't matter how much serious the case. Up to the court.

If someone whoever left the family 110% and turn it out jealous and want back w/them but whoever got new life and new relationship spouse. All you want running abuse their reputation. Bet your life wasted time and what more... don't need painting their faces. Other spouse is trying to effort best interest for their child as step children... If I were you.. I don't mind as long they are doing good care.. fine by me then... If you want continue abuse their repluation and not even you think about children interest look up at you how much you're doing bad thing against them... Don't dare you think about... forgot about children interest.. Please think about children needs not for their new spouse relationship.. That's all my opinion.. let them GO... as long they are happy... IMPORTANT you want better life raise your children then do it.. if not.. your call!

If you want divorce or seprate.. that your call... Don't dare you running their lives and whoever spouse want new life with new relationship being... All you want abuse their life.. Who are you hell not even care about your children prior the list? That what you wanted... Don't dare you call them whore/bitch/slut or other bad calling names... If women decide new date guy.. Don't dare you call him pimp/bastard whore/womanzier or other bad calling name... Obvouis you're the one obession probelmatic... Can't you leave their life business and let them go.. THINK ABOUT YOUR CHILDREN PRIOR LIST... all you want giving your children happy good enivorment stable living and others... If you refuse doing it... You're making the worst.... your call!
The judge will decision really HUGE hard... "Possible lead to... giving to Agency will involve your case and watch the children.." Do you want let Agency look into under your microscopes ? (means Never miss whole your life and like vulture you) Do you like it or not? That's mean your call! Not my problem decision..

If Volience Domestic or Abuser , HUGE CASE SERIOUS because cannot allow you seeing the children as long mentioner will supervise you bit longer years until you come and clean... not easy... Up to the JUDGE...

cuz i'm not the judge you anyone... but my strongly feelings truly this serious case or mild case but think about children interest.... Do you want bad person continue , willing allow your child look up... I do not think so that what you don't want to....

***THINK ABOUT YOUR CHILD BEST INTEREST*** I recommend, I don't need you running Ex's new life with spouse/starting relationship..
If you continue running their ex's new life with spouse/relationship that means you have no LIFE... not willing care about children's interest of welfare.

If you willing change and clean your nose... Go talk yourself and look the mirror.. what have you done too far...? *think about it*

 

[Cheri]

It's hard to understand what you're trying to say, I'll try my best here, If non-custody parent have minimum visitation, which says by the court, then non-custodial parent have to follow the court's order, included child support as well. Non-custodial parent can go back to court with documented that proves that that this person had change of circumstance, which meaning this person is not the same person as before. But, that doesn't mean the non-custodial parent will win visitation rights, It's all up to the judge.

It's best to have parents refrain themselves from fighting in front of their child(ren). They do not have to get along, being best buddies or best of friends, But, they do have to get along in front of their children, in front of their eyes. Both parents are suppose to show their love to their child(ren) it's not about them, it's about their child(ren). And it's best to keep the negatives that being said about the father or mother away from the child(ren) ears, because they do not need to be dragged in the middle of who hate who, who's the asshole and who's the bitch. It's best the child(ren) doesn't hear what non-custodial or custodial parents are saying about eachothers.

And what's best for the child, both parents non-custodial and custodial needs to bond with their child(ren), but if there's a reason not to because the child feels not confident and not safe or one of them don't have a stable home or provide them proper care, then I think it's best to take it up to court, or if the custodial still has the visition documented, then the custodial parent can follow that, if he/she wants to for the welfare of his/her child.

 

[Handsome_Smiley]

Sorry, I feel if a parent is good for the child and everything and wants to see their child, then that parent has every right to do whatever in their power to see their child.

Now, if the parent is trying to do that just to cause problems with their ex, then no. Most of the time, you can tell what their intent is before going to court. If the parent is not trying to pay child support, then no. If the parent is not trying to see their child during the normal visitation rights, then no. But is the parent is doing everything they can to make sure their child is taken care of and the other trying to stop, then yes, take it back to the courts.

What I am really saying, it depends on the reason why they want to take it back to the courts.

 

[sara1981]

when i was 9 years old my parents got divorces in 1990 and my parents got custody of me and my brother when me and my brother was small till reach at ages 18 years old and my parents have rights for visit of me and my brother after my parent's divorces but im now 25 years old and my brother now 22 years old.

mostly parents got divorces its happened makes more hard for kids understand why parents got divorces for more understand like as affair,fighting,whatevers,etc.and got custody for kids have rights for visit if kids going see their dad on weekend they stay with mom on regular weekend.

my cousin always going see their dad who lives in Texas and my cousin now lives with his dad but my aunt got divorces from her first husband and have right for visit and my aunt really hate him lots since divorces i cant tell you but im sure my cousin will see my aunt sometimes his name is Nolan he is 16 years old he like going with dad more best for him.

when i was 9 years old before my parents got divorces my mom got files of divorces and my mom wont get married to my dad for longtimes for more reasons its my family busniess and family matters also.

and also my mom told me says my aunt and their first ex-husband got divorces for more reason because got cheat at my Aunt for more reason its my family busniess