Hearing loss Pet Peeves!

Danders

New Member
I won't fake hearing anything if I can help it.... too much stuff goes missed and then you really have a problem on your hands. If it's someone you really can't understand then make them write it down.

Part of the reason why I hate the phone... I don't trust translators or videophone interpeters to get the message across. I much prefer using email or text!
 

stephaniep

Active Member
Thank you for the replies. You've all been helpful. I think before I get anything I will have to research it first, but for now, getting ideas is good.

There is so much I have to learn and accept. Not doing good with the accepting just yet? My husband and I went to the dentist yesterday. I struggled to hear him clearly even with my hearing aids, but I thought I did okay, I may not have picked up everything he said, but I thought it was good enough. I was taken first and then my husband was seen. When I finished I sat in the waiting room and waited for him to finish. When he came out, I waited for him to get his jacket and the dentist came up to him and handed him an appointment slip. . I figured ha ha he's got a cavity. My husband turns and hands me the appointment slip for some further dental work next week. I was only a few steps away from where the dentist was standing, couldn't he have handed it to me, hello, I'm here! Once again, I felt like I didn't exist. I felt like the invisible woman. While I'm grateful for my husband's help, how do I take back control over my life and speak for myself in these situations? My husband is only suppose to step in when I fail to communicate? Come to think of it, that was a rude thing for the dentist to do! I've always been in control of my life and affairs and now it seems I've lost that? Well, that's my Pet Peeve for today.
 

Jane B.

Well-Known Member
Thank you for the replies. You've all been helpful. I think before I get anything I will have to research it first, but for now, getting ideas is good.

There is so much I have to learn and accept. Not doing good with the accepting just yet? My husband and I went to the dentist yesterday. I struggled to hear him clearly even with my hearing aids, but I thought I did okay, I may not have picked up everything he said, but I thought it was good enough. I was taken first and then my husband was seen. When I finished I sat in the waiting room and waited for him to finish. When he came out, I waited for him to get his jacket and the dentist came up to him and handed him an appointment slip. . I figured ha ha he's got a cavity. My husband turns and hands me the appointment slip for some further dental work next week. I was only a few steps away from where the dentist was standing, couldn't he have handed it to me, hello, I'm here! Once again, I felt like I didn't exist. I felt like the invisible woman. While I'm grateful for my husband's help, how do I take back control over my life and speak for myself in these situations? My husband is only suppose to step in when I fail to communicate? Come to think of it, that was a rude thing for the dentist to do! I've always been in control of my life and affairs and now it seems I've lost that? Well, that's my Pet Peeve for today.

You say something about it when it happens. Did you say anything about how hurt you were because of what the dentist did? There may have been simply the fact that you husband was the first one of you seen as the dentist came out.

I would also be screaming about why they made and appointment and not just told you that you needed more work done. They have no way of knowing what you already have coming up next week or any given date. In fact I lost a doctor over this issue years ago. I greatly objected to them making an appointment and not just giving a referral and he wouldn't see me again because of the way I objected to what they did.
 

sammiller525

New Member
I can’t tell you how many times I have faked understanding people. I usually just nod and smile and I have no idea what was said. I try to read their body language. It’s when they look at me quizzically and don’t go away that I have to say, “ok? What? Say it again?” I’m sure I have left people scratching their heads. :)
Me too. Some get mad. I don’t give a fuck. Be mad. I’m deaf. Can they change it? Can i? Then why be mad? Be efficient with communication.. i swear, hearies are so slow sometimes
 

stephaniep

Active Member
No, I usually sit there and take it. Then my husband hears all the venting when we get home? I never was much of a potty mouth, but since my hearing worsened even I let out a few F-words. It's just not me. After I say it, it surprises me, then I feel guilt and ask what is happening to me, it sure is changing me? Well sammiller, the hearing swear for all kind of reasons, so we should fit right in, except when they swear at us we won't hear, unless we look at them and know how to lip read? .Well, then in return we can always use a sign language they'll understand...Lol...it's a joke.
 

mypjpants

Member
A lot of times I have to fake it with my boyfriend. My hearing isn't too far gone so I can catch a lot of what he says just because he has a very deep voice, but he likes to call me on his breaks and talk to me and I just can't understand anything. I've tried to explain to him that I don't like calls but he's a little oblivious and doesn't realise he's not really talking to me when he calls me, it's just me faking it whenever I hear him speak.
 

stephaniep

Active Member
Do you have volume control on your phone, maybe if your hearing loss is mild, you might want to try to turn the volume up, and hopefully you'll be able to hear him? I have one of the volume controls on mine, and for the longest time, I was still able to take calls when I turned it up? Now I have to use the volume control and put myself on speaker and still can't hear properly, so for the most part, I have quit using the phone. I've put myself into too many embarrassing situations to continue. I thought I received a call from the Drug Store about my RX, well here I am giving her all my personal information assuming she was asking for it, after bluffing my way through that call, I find out it was
H & R block Tax Professionals? Funny she was going along with it, maybe because I wouldn't let her get in an word edgewise. Then there was the doctors calls, who were calling me about some medical urgency, and I would bluff that too. I would hang up rudely on friends , thinking it was soliciting calls.... Finally figured out, it 's best for them to leave a message then my husband can try to drill it into me later as to who it was and what they wanted? So much for staying independent..
 
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stephaniep

Active Member
Pet Peeve, no longer being able to hear some of the tones in music,. Because of it, the music kind of died when my hearing loss worsened, I tried ear buds, headphones, total silence, Turning up speakers often don't help, the singer screech their sound, no longer able to hear it clearly, and it sounds like the music and the singer is missing notes? To me they sound off tune but I know they are not? .If someone played my classics and asked me to identify the vocalist, I wouldn't even be able to do that anymore because the song sounds so different? ? Anyone find that? I went through some of the classics like David Bowie and Queen,, Celine Dion, Tina, Turner, Bonjovi, my favorites, although there was one song out of them all, that I could still hear very close to normal was Prince's Purple Rain. For me that song had all the right tones in it, maybe not the higher pitches of the song, but boy was it nice to relate to music again. The rest of my classics are in my head, and maybe one day, there will be a gadget of some sort that will allow me to hear music again. the way it's supposed to sound. Was thinking it could be caused by the Oticons, before I had Sharkey HA's and they gave me a more natural sound.




























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mypjpants

Member
Do you have volume control on your phone, maybe if your hearing loss is mild, you might want to try to turn the volume up, and hopefully you'll be able to hear him? I have one of the volume controls on mine, and for the longest time, I was still able to take calls when I turned it up? Now I have to use the volume control and put myself on speaker and still can't hear properly, so for the most part, I have quit using the phone. I've put myself into too many embarrassing situations to continue. I thought I received a call from the Drug Store about my RX, well here I am giving her all my personal information assuming she was asking for it, after bluffing my way through that call, I find out it was
H & R block Tax Professionals? Funny she was going along with it, maybe because I wouldn't let her get in an word edgewise. Then there was the doctors calls, who were calling me about some medical urgency, and I would bluff that too. I would hang up rudely on friends , thinking it was soliciting calls.... Finally figured out, it 's best for them to leave a message then my husband can try to drill it into me later as to who it was and what they wanted? So much for staying independent..
I do have volume on my phone but I still can't understand him because of the white noise that always comes with phone calls. I once faked a whole conversation with him because at the beginning all I could do was ask him to repeat himself over and over. I like the calls though because even though I can't really talk to him, I do miss his voice and it's nice to hear even when hes not there.
 

Valorrian

Active Member
Do you have volume control on your phone, maybe if your hearing loss is mild, you might want to try to turn the volume up, and hopefully you'll be able to hear him? I have one of the volume controls on mine, and for the longest time, I was still able to take calls when I turned it up? Now I have to use the volume control and put myself on speaker and still can't hear properly, so for the most part, I have quit using the phone. I've put myself into too many embarrassing situations to continue. I thought I received a call from the Drug Store about my RX, well here I am giving her all my personal information assuming she was asking for it, after bluffing my way through that call, I find out it was
H & R block Tax Professionals? Funny she was going along with it, maybe because I wouldn't let her get in an word edgewise. Then there was the doctors calls, who were calling me about some medical urgency, and I would bluff that too. I would hang up rudely on friends , thinking it was soliciting calls.... Finally figured out, it 's best for them to leave a message then my husband can try to drill it into me later as to who it was and what they wanted? So much for staying independent..

Get Captioncall. It will help you on the phone and it's free. Your audiologist can send in the paper work. That is what they did for me. It's a phone for your home (not cell). The phone is free and caption call comes in and sets up everything for you. It was very easy and the lady that came was really nice. It will give you freedom again to use the phone. It also has an answering machine built in.

http://captioncallphone.com/
 

stephaniep

Active Member
Just recently my husband bought me a used Apple Iphone for a try out, to see if it would help me, and I got a plan from Telus but it's only Talk and Text. LOL, my first cell phone. I have no data with it, and don't even use the phone part because I hear nothing at all even with my hearing Aids, but the text feature is coming in handy, for which I am grateful for.
 

stephaniep

Active Member
Today was a little upsetting. Got a call from the doctors office and I didn't dare pick it up, so let the machine grab it. Well sad to say the receptionist wasn't very understandable. It's hard to make her out, so I will be lucky if my husband can.? These people were asked more than once not to phone, but to send information through email or text. They aren't listening at all?
 

Jane B.

Well-Known Member
Just recently my husband bought me a used Apple Iphone for a try out, to see if it would help me, and I got a plan from Telus but it's only Talk and Text. LOL, my first cell phone. I have no data with it, and don't even use the phone part because I hear nothing at all even with my hearing Aids, but the text feature is coming in handy, for which I am grateful for.

I had some suggestions until I looked up Telus and discovered you are in Canada so suggestions for services in the US would not work.
 

stephaniep

Active Member
LoL, still happening here, if it wasn't for my husband either picking up the call or listening to the message left behind I would have missed appts? Are they that disorganized that they don't have it written down, but what gets to me, some of these people are reminded more than once, yet it's like they don't acknowledge or perhaps there is a constant change of staff that don't bother reading the notations to Email only.
 

zephren

Well-Known Member
Unfortunately many doctors are not flexible due to HIPPA rules or fear of violating HIPPA. Email and text msgs are not secure communication methods. Does your doctor have a patient portal? I use that with my primary. They can send msgs securely that way.

Before I started using VRS for all calls, I tried using a captioned phone while I was still somewhat HOH. The delayed communication was intolerable. The one good thing it offered was captioned voicemail. If they don’t have a portal, you may want to try a service that offers speech-to-text voicemail.
 

x1heavy

Active Member
Doctors. I love them.

In fact the one i have been with for 20+ years I dont go see unless there is something busted or running wild. Since they opened a new walk in clinic its even less necessary to see the original doc. There is always the ER. More on the ER in a moment.

Any other doctor causes problems generally. There is a Eye doctor in Searcy who runs a older clinic and does a good job overall. However the secretary is up to here in paperwork has no time for you and your questions are immaterial. However you will be handed paperwork to fill out. Here in the south I have grown accustomed to two languages from the doctor. You have a whatsist. We can fix that whatsist. When that doctor talks to a nurse with the computer laptop or a file folder to record the whatsist details they speak a entirely different language built on ABC's put together in different ways. A giggling Baby would not be more fluent throwing Alphabet Blocks around.

That offends me. In trucking with the evolution of technology and all sorts of related problems of information you must have information. Not brushed off as oh well you hae a boo boo. They can fix it when you are finished delivery today. Get to work you are wasting time talking to me. Shoo. That boo boo could very well be a burning rig closing down 495 at 95 in the middle of Rush Hour. (DC South) and your company will be all over the news.

What I end up doing with nurses is trap them long enough to gain a copy of whatever it is they wrote or type in. When they hand that to me then I can use the internet to learn about the exact particulars. OR have them take a moment to explain to me whats what. That takes time. They never have time for anyone. Even you. There lies the problem.

A more important problem is in computer time, 50 people are waiting out front for a hour or two. Long ago without computer anything there would only be one or two to be seen. Plenty of time to talk to you about anything then.

Went to the ER for a problem not controlled at home. Turned out to be a dangerous infection. (Not covid, staph or strep A dont know yet which) they took me in fast enough and every time someone came in to deal with me take the mask down please so I can see what you are saying. Ty. Some show fear and back up a little bit. Ok fine send in someone else please. I never let anyone do anything without teaching me who, what, why, when and how. And especially the purpose of that procedure. Eventually it resolved the problem in due time. (And medicines)

Medicine is the fun part. Doctor, this is owie. Make pain stop. Using very bad english because it really is painful. They look at you and ask questions. Thats where profanity comes into play because when you have that kind of pain for whatever the tears are in the way. Normally its not a problem but is is when you are trying to lip read. You eventually get your medicine and can now think better but only for a few hours what then?

As a final step to the whole medical thing, I go to the Hospital Admin Office upstairs and pull the full records related to my visit or stay. In those records are everything by everyone. I remember one physical therapist asking about what problems I have with chores at home related to the situation with the surgery. By the time i finished explaining to her she was not interested in any further qestions about the chores. When I got the reocrds I realized according to her what I had to say on that test question did not have any meaning or structure to her.

A nice waste of both of our time I say. And people wonder why I become more difficult at times with certain situations in communications.

What I like to think sometimes is to stick a Hearie who is to hae a boo boo fixed in a entirely deaf hospital. Not a word is spoken. Then we will see about communication. Has all the makings of a good horror movie me thinks.
 

Mart

Active Member
My peeve lately is trying to hear people through those damn Covid screens, I had to chat to a person behind one of these screens & she was also wearing a mask & face visor, I thought wtf!!, she looked like an astronaut, I couldn't hear a damn word she was saying, I understand in some places these screens were necessary, but for me they block too much sound, anyone also have problems talking through these screens?.
 
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