Do you believe in grounding your child/children?

Cheri

Prayers for my dad.
Premium Member
How about telling your son this: Don't make me come to your class in my pajama and robe and slippers and embarass you in front of your class!!!:rofl:

Lmao!! Exactly my thoughts! I might scare the little kids with my hair that sticks up in the air. :laugh2:
 

frankiesmom

New Member
i would go with your gut..your boyfriend isnt the childs father, correct? then he really has no say. tell him to let you be her parent.
 

Kalima01

New Member
When my brother and I were growing up we got grounded, we got smacked, we were sent to our rooms etc whenever we got in trouble.

I see nothing wrong with the way I was brought up. When (if) I have children, I will bring them up the same way.
 

KristinaB

Emotional Mess
Premium Member
We were grounded, spanked and sent to the corner a lot. Each of us reacted differently to it. I always used the "Love and Logic" approach, one brother used to be very strict and the other was so relaxed his kids had the run of the house. Now, my kids are the very respectful ones, the strict brother's kids want nothing to do with him or our side of the family. The very relaxed brother's kids are heavy drinkers and smokers. Also, his daughter has a hard time holding a job. His son, finally shaped up and has an awesome job.
 

rockin'robin

Well-Known Member
I usually do a lot of talking to my boys. Especially when they were much younger. And yes, I do believe in "grounding" a child that misbehaves, shows no respect, etc. The longest one of my sons was grounded was for 2 weeks, along with no TV, no video games or computer. The infraction warranted it! (Disrespect) to his teacher.

Now that they are older, and seem to have every electronic gadget known to man and new Laptops for Xmas this year, they are very careful! :giggle:...I don't beat around the bush with them at all. As they are now teenagers, they know better and right from wrong.
 

Audiofuzzy

Well-Known Member
The longest one of my sons was grounded was for 2 weeks, along with no TV, no video games or computer. The infraction warranted it! (Disrespect) to his teacher.

Don't you think, however, that taking beloved gadgets (nooooooooooooo!!)
away was enough to get the point across?

Personally, I have doubts about grounds being efficient... :hmm:

Fuzzy
 

Angel1989

Well-Known Member
Premium Member
I would never hit my children. Usually if I sat down and talked to them at their level is all it took. When my son was in his teens, when he got mad he would run upstairs and slam the door. I gave him many warnings. The last time he did this he came home from school and we had removed his bedroom door. Worked great. Never slammed a door again. Sending them to their room is ok, but, if they have video games, computers etc, it's not a punishment. I'm proud of how all of my kids turned out. Being respectful is the best quality I believe.
 

Vorsia

Active Member
communication is key never hurt your kids feelings ,always listen and they will to you,never spoil your child by giving them what ever they want ....if they don't work hard for it by respecting you and doing hard work in school..i have learned alot being a young mom of three..don't look weak in the sight of your kids lol, they will try to walk all over you lol...
 

Beach girl

Active Member
The original thread here was started 4 years ago. Any particular reason it got re-activated now?

Re: discipline: we got spanked (rarely), talked to (nearly always), and grounded as teenagers, once in a while. The only time I got grounded was when I borrowed my mom's car, and she told me I could go get my friends, but I was NOT to go down to the beach. It was early spring, around mid-April I think, and there had been reports of some unsavory guy down there wandering around.

So the first thing I did was go pick up my friend. Second thing was go down to the beach. Third thing: lock the keys in the car! AAAAGGGGHHH!

We tried everything to open the car door lock, but nothing worked, we couldn't spring it. Finally had to call my mom (from a pay phone - remember those?) and she walked from our house to the beach - a good healthy two miles.

Fortunately it was a beautiful day and she really didn't mind the walk - but I got grounded for two weeks for doing exactly what she had told me not to do. Also I couldn't borrow the car again for quite some time, other than on specific errands she wanted me to do.

So - in my opinion, grounding is a fair punishment if the crime is somehow related to going out and about. I'm not sure that I would use it for something like talking in class. That seems like the kind of infraction where a good talking-to might be more effective, and thinking of ways to teach the child impulse control. Maybe even coordinate with the teacher and perhaps move the child's seating arrangements away from the best friend who encourages the in-class talking.

I think it's important that parents keep a sense of priorities in mind when it comes to discipline. Mostly you want the child to develop ways to control their own behavior, and that comes through guidance, not punishment, almost always.
 

KristinaB

Emotional Mess
Premium Member
When we got grounded - there were no electronic gadgets or even telephones in the bedroom. My parents would remove our favorite things. Me - my Barbies and such. Oldest brother - his models and such. Other brother - his drums and such. Parents would not remove the hamsters, snakes or rats as they were his responsibility to care for.
 

blondon704

New Member
We do talking, the only smacks are on the hands it will be a spank if it is something dangerous or harmful towards siblings, example my youngest daughter has a very bad habbit of throwing toys are her baby brother (9 months) so she gets her hands smacked for that. Time out seems to be pretty efficient in our house as well. We have a specific seat in the corner for time outs and everybody knows the name of that chair. We haven't gotten to the ages of grounding yet but my oldest daughter (6) has had her ds and all other little game things taken from her for a week (once). That definitely got the point across.
 

rockin'robin

Well-Known Member
Don't you think, however, that taking beloved gadgets (nooooooooooooo!!)
away was enough to get the point across?

Personally, I have doubts about grounds being efficient... :hmm:

Fuzzy

it worked for my son....the Teacher was a Subsitute and when that happens, kids will try to get by with anything. He was among 10 of the students throwing "pennies" at the Teacher when her back was turned, and making "noises".....Disrupting the class, period.

Taking away from a child something that he enjoys is punishment for bad behavior, and he "knew better" than to disrepect his teacher in that manner. With 3 teenage "boys" and I'm only 5'2'', I do lay down the "Law" when it comes to education, manners and respect.

The punishment that I gave out, and you think it was "too severe"?...Nahh!....I sure as heck did not get a 2x4 and "spanK' his hiney!....I've never had a problem with him since then! He loves his electronic gadgets!....And as long as he behaves, they are there for him to use. I would never encourage this bad behavior, or even think of giving him some form of "enjoyment" as long as he acted the way he did....'Enuf said....
 

metalangel

Active Member
I have no children but I was grounded/privileges taken away when I was one.

I think it works, because the kid earns that trust and respect is earned. Fear of disappointing a parent or guardian they respect keeps you in line much more than whatever punishment for pissing off parent or guardian seen as a jerk. The respect has to work both ways, though... telling the kid if they ask for a stretch of the rules that they're getting it because "I trust you" is a huge boost to their confidence too.

I suspect that's why the OP was never grounded, it sounded like generally she was well behaved.
 

Grayma

New Member
For us there is another element of 'grounding'- we use the time to rebuild or build further on family relationships. We don't let grounded kids sit by themselves in their rooms being sullen and building their resentment. They get less time without outside influences and more time with parental influence.
 

KristinaB

Emotional Mess
Premium Member
For us there is another element of 'grounding'- we use the time to rebuild or build further on family relationships. We don't let grounded kids sit by themselves in their rooms being sullen and building their resentment. They get less time without outside influences and more time with parental influence.

I can remember when I was grounded, one of the rules was to sit, reflect on why I was grounded and write out an apology letter to the person involved. I did this same thing with my kids. I have saved all the letters my kids wrote to hubby & I as I love to look over the changes in their behavior and handwriting.
 

Foxrac

Well-Known Member
Premium Member
I'm rarely been grounded because I went to deaf school during teen era and got different consequences for break the school policies.
 

TheOracle

New Member
Sure. He gets his Wii taken away or his computer or some such. I don't know if it "works", but it's my primary method of parenting punishment. I mean, I don't hit him, so I have to have a Nuclear Option somewhere. :)

If he does something that's Really Out of Line, he loses all electronics. Usually it's something like, "You were supposed to clean your room before you picked up that Wii Remote and I see your clothes are under the bed..." type of thing and he has to fork over the remote til the next day. Basic responsibility stuff.

Rarely is he going to his room for a day (or hour)...it would have to be some kind of continued behavior pattern. That hasn't happened in at least a year. He was six and kept stealing sweets from the kitchen.

My kid is a breeze in general.

My students on the other hand...well...beh.
 
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