I never thought or looked at deaf as stupid in my hearing days beb..I think HofH HAve it tough they get exsarparted on both fronts
I never looked at Deaf as stupid either, it's obviously ignorant to judge any person as stupid without getting to know them first. But, I think it's fairly unique that people take the time to understand differences instead of just judging them instantly and being scared of change or having to think about other people as actual people, despite the differences.
This is more broad than just relating to audism, but there are strong stereotypes among English speakers. When someone can't write English proficiently, or speak clearly, it's assumed those people must not be intelligent. They're written off quickly and the person moves on. You can see it every day on the internet where an ESL writer is berated because of their written English proficiency.
I don't think it's at all fair to say HOH/late-deafened have it harder than born deaf. Yes, we'll be outsiders/newcomers in Deaf culture and probably never fit in like a native, yet we don't quite fit in among hearies so well anymore either. It's definitely not easy being HOH, and neither Deaf nor hearing fully understand our challenges and frustrations. Just as we will never fully understand what it's like being born deaf.
But we learned English first. We can typically still speak, even if we can't hear anymore. It's easier for us to communicate with hearies, if only in one direction. We understand hearies more, because we were hearies. And we typically have lasting relationships within hearing culture. We were hearing natives first. It's not the same, it never will be.
Under good circumstances, people don't know I'm HOH. But I've already experienced audism.
Restaurants are tough. Wait staff are in a hurry, they just want to do their job and move to the next table. If they speak clearly, loudly, I can see their mouth, and they don't have a high pitched voice, I can typically get what they're asking on the first attempt. It's especially true if I've been there before and know what to expect. Change some of those, or throw a question that I didn't expect and I'm going to be asking for repeats.
Several times already, I've had wait staff show their frustration in ways that dismiss me as a customer, a person.
I think it's a bit easier for seniors who are HOH. People expect older folks to have trouble hearing and are typically ready to accommodate them. They don't expect young adults to be HOH though. I don't know what they think when I can't hear them. I don't know if they think I'm stupid, if I'm trying to be a pain in their ass, or if they get that I can't hear and simply don't want to deal with it. I don't know. But they don't always treat me with respect and it doesn't feel good to be clueless as to what was said or asked.
Being treated poorly because of my hearing has made me change when, where, and how I do things. I think that's what makes it audism, having to feel like I can't do the same thing a hearie can do and still be treated well just because I can't hear so well.
