Adjustment to late onset deafness

Sweetpolly

New Member
Hi....If there is anyone that has late onset deafness are in the Inland Empire in So. California. I can help with some life changing peer counseling and support tips. I'm a Hard of Hearing Advocate at CODIE (Center On Deafness Inland Empire in Riverside, CA) and I also have a support group. Please refer anyone to me if they need asisstance. I, myself have lost my hearing throughout the years and had to learn a lot about myself and life changing issues that occurred because of my hearing loss. Main thing is for the person to go to someone that understands and talk about what is happening and get supportive tips they can use in their lives. A support group if a wonderful help, they want to go (some do not want to attend these).
 

Braydens Mom

New Member
I guess you could consider me hard of hearing. I've noticed for the last several years that I am constantly asking people to repeat what they say. I noticed it really bad last year at one of my horse shows. I was watching the ring steward for change of gait calls. I could not hear it over the PA. Made it very difficult.
Some days it is better than others. I know it is slipping, and I deal with it. Sometimes I get angry because I don't get all of a conversation.. or my husband gets mad at me because I don't answer when the kids are trying to talk to me.

Though its hard to know where you fit in. I'm not d/Deaf. I have been taking ASL for both myself and my son. I enjoy every minute of it. Though when I try to make friends with HOH or Deaf I am shunned. (Not by all, but by most...)

Though I am not willing to give up. I am sure someone out there wants a friend! lol
 

Sweetpolly

New Member
I guess you could consider me hard of hearing. I've noticed for the last several years that I am constantly asking people to repeat what they say. I noticed it really bad last year at one of my horse shows. I was watching the ring steward for change of gait calls. I could not hear it over the PA. Made it very difficult.
Some days it is better than others. I know it is slipping, and I deal with it. Sometimes I get angry because I don't get all of a conversation.. or my husband gets mad at me because I don't answer when the kids are trying to talk to me.

Though its hard to know where you fit in. I'm not d/Deaf. I have been taking ASL for both myself and my son. I enjoy every minute of it. Though when I try to make friends with HOH or Deaf I am shunned. (Not by all, but by most...)

Though I am not willing to give up. I am sure someone out there wants a friend! lol

Hi, just so you will know..you can google.... HLAA - Hearing Loss Association of America and they have local chapters in every state where other Hard of Hearing people meet and are very supportive with advice , tips etc.
Their website is full of useful informaiton for HOH people as well and even students who need help in the classrooom.
 

mshel

New Member
I know exactly what you mean. There are a couple of fairly new nurses that I am currently working with that seem to have changed their perspective about me since learning about my deafness. I have been told I'm too shy, then in the next breath, I'm too aggressive. I have been told I had no business working in the OR because some people think Im a 'patient saftey issue" although I have been working there for several years with out any problems until the new hires say these things about me. It is so frustrating since they just dont understand how much I work at making sure communication is open, and how much i do to not put my patients at any type of risk. ARRRGGG, sometimes I wish they could be deaf for one day to understand.









I still get some anxieties when new physicians or nurses begin to work in my unit. I think it is a little bit of ego though. I feel I have to prove my skills and professional capabilities to anyone new. That can make me feel cold and insensitive.

For new AD'ers; I lost my hearing with one semester left in nursing school. I felt devestated. I went from being near 'overconfident' to completely insecure. After a couple years, I finally got HA's and it made a good difference with my private and professional life. My insecurities with some people remain. I still get angry and spitefull when it comes to music and singing. I loved to sing, but now I will NOT do it around anybody. Also, I think I have extreme insecurities with starting a relationship with anybody. I want to go to grad school SO bad to be doctor in genetics. I make excuses every year for not applying, but I really know inside my reason.
 

candybrowneyes

Active Member
Though its hard to know where you fit in. I'm not d/Deaf. I have been taking ASL for both myself and my son. I enjoy every minute of it. Though when I try to make friends with HOH or Deaf I am shunned. (Not by all, but by most...)

Though I am not willing to give up. I am sure someone out there wants a friend! lol

Well I am HoH and I will be your friend =) I am sure many here think of you the same way. :wave: :aw:
 

oaktree

New Member
Questions, please: 1) Does ALDA operate in local chapters and support groups or is it a national organization? 2) With SSHL and not yet knowing how to sign or lip-read, how could I participate in a support group? Thanks.
 

hohDougRN

New Member
something is missing for me, but its tough to articulate it. I am comfortable at work, but not so in personal life. I feel like a loner all too often. Since my divorce 2 years ago- there is no such thing as going to social activities. I feel like such a loser outside of work, hence I am content spending all the time possible at the hospital. I have a sence of importance and belongingnes there.
 

saywhatkid

Huked on fonix werx!
Premium Member
something is missing for me, but its tough to articulate it. I am comfortable at work, but not so in personal life. I feel like a loner all too often. Since my divorce 2 years ago- there is no such thing as going to social activities. I feel like such a loser outside of work, hence I am content spending all the time possible at the hospital. I have a sence of importance and belongingnes there.

Sounds like you divorced your wife and married your career. I do not mean to sound critical of you. Many people marry their careers while they still have a spouse.
 

Jolie77

New Member
Premium Member
Ummm. what's "sticky thread"??

When a thread is 'sticky', It means that the thread will be on top of above of any threads in the specific forum.

Let's think about it - It is like when you see a bulletin board at work or places, You will see these post-it notes that are there with the tacks on it for everyone to see it.

Hope that helps you understand what 'sticky' means. :)
 

November Gypsy

New Member
Hm. Well, it seems that people are people whether hearing or not. d/Deaf, HOH, and hearing people all seem to have a tendency to exclude those who have abilities we don't have, or who don't have abilities we have. Not true of everyone, of course and thank God for that. It's so silly though. Not everyone can do everyone, yet humans seem to delight in punishing each other for it and then bemoaning their own loneliness even though they won't accept people who are different from them. It all goes back to the fact that it's a very good thing we ARE different...the world would be boring other wise. I think it's just as much the job of people who are hoh or d/Deaf to reach out to hearies as it is the other way 'round. Just a thought. We insist we are proud of who we are and then take offense at natural awkwardness from people who just need a little time to adjust to our unique needs. I really believe that if given the chance and the time, most people, hearie or not, will come around and work with people different then themselves.
 

jillio

New Member
something is missing for me, but its tough to articulate it. I am comfortable at work, but not so in personal life. I feel like a loner all too often. Since my divorce 2 years ago- there is no such thing as going to social activities. I feel like such a loser outside of work, hence I am content spending all the time possible at the hospital. I have a sence of importance and belongingnes there.

Perhaps that is because you know what to expect at work, but socially, life is much more unpredictable. It could be that you just need time to ease yourself back into the social arena. There is not a set in stone time limit.

Having said that, I will also qualify it with the statement that it is important to keep challenging yourself to try what makes you uncomfortable. It is the road to growth.
 

jillio

New Member
Hm. Well, it seems that people are people whether hearing or not. d/Deaf, HOH, and hearing people all seem to have a tendency to exclude those who have abilities we don't have, or who don't have abilities we have. Not true of everyone, of course and thank God for that. It's so silly though. Not everyone can do everyone, yet humans seem to delight in punishing each other for it and then bemoaning their own loneliness even though they won't accept people who are different from them. It all goes back to the fact that it's a very good thing we ARE different...the world would be boring other wise. I think it's just as much the job of people who are hoh or d/Deaf to reach out to hearies as it is the other way 'round. Just a thought. We insist we are proud of who we are and then take offense at natural awkwardness from people who just need a little time to adjust to our unique needs. I really believe that if given the chance and the time, most people, hearie or not, will come around and work with people different then themselves.

Very insightful. Perhaps we would all be better off if we embraced the differences instead of focusing so much on the sameness. We all like the company of people we can relate to, but the truth of the matter is, our lives become richer through exposing ourselves to differences.
 

AlleyCat

Well-Known Member
Sounds like you divorced your wife and married your career. I do not mean to sound critical of you. Many people marry their careers while they still have a spouse.

That is a big part of the reason I ended up leaving my ex-husband, so I can relate to that!
 

saywhatkid

Huked on fonix werx!
Premium Member
It seems that we have several members that are currently going through adjustments to late onset deafness. I suggested a support type group through AD, and offered to facillitate.
Just curious; is there any plan to have an actual LDA group in AllDeaf, now that you have returned? We can wait until the "Welcome Back" parades are finished, if you wish. Was wondering if this is going anywhere, other than a thread/intro thing.
 

jillio

New Member
Just curious; is there any plan to have an actual LDA group in AllDeaf, now that you have returned? We can wait until the "Welcome Back" parades are finished, if you wish. Was wondering if this is going anywhere, other than a thread/intro thing.

Actually, I had hoped originally to expand it into an LDA group. It was suggested by the mods that we try a thread first, and see how it went.
 
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