Will be deaf...and am curious

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Mike Bonheim

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Apologies if this is a covered tic already...

I am totally deaf in one ear, and I have a vestibular schwanomma in the other ear, and I know that I will eventually be totally deaf someday. Best part is that I don't know when - could be 3 years from now, could be 40. But I WILL be deaf someday.

So, I try to prepare myself for what will be a massive change, when it happens.msometimes I plug my good ear to try to sense what it would be like to be in that situation if I were deaf.

I try to prepare a business for myself, one that I coul perform with or without hearing.

But when I look at my life with my family, with my young children, with my wife, I wonder how do you keep that relationship, as strong?

How is being deaf not isolating?
 
Mike Bonheim said:
Apologies if this is a covered tic already...

I am totally deaf in one ear, and I have a vestibular schwanomma in the other ear, and I know that I will eventually be totally deaf someday. Best part is that I don't know when - could be 3 years from now, could be 40. But I WILL be deaf someday.

So, I try to prepare myself for what will be a massive change, when it happens.msometimes I plug my good ear to try to sense what it would be like to be in that situation if I were deaf.

I try to prepare a business for myself, one that I coul perform with or without hearing.

But when I look at my life with my family, with my young children, with my wife, I wonder how do you keep that relationship, as strong?

How is being deaf not isolating?
Click to expand...


Bold statement> To answer your question, being deaf in the hearing world can be very isolating when a deaf person is not able to sign and trying to lipread people's lips. But if you are surrounded with Deaf people and signing ASL that would not be isolating. We will feel good about communicating in the Deaf world better than in the hearing world. Deaf Culture is a must for us, deaf and Deaf people.

So plan on going to the ASL class and learn how to express and sign with ease. Also you can try having your family come with you for ASL class if they want to go. Welcome and good luck on your journey to the silent world. :wave:
 
I was told at age 10 that I would end up totally deaf. At age 42, I went total deaf. This was after I married and had 2 children. The only things that has changed for all intents and purposes has been communication barriers with the public. Over the years as my hearing got worse, I had to deal with the loss of hearing friends who just didn't understand. Now, I have to deal with family members (who are not with me on a day by day basis) not understanding. I also have some friends who "forget" that I can no longer hear.

All the advice I can offer is to totally prepare yourself. Learn ASL and make sure your family learns as well. Be open with everyone about what may occur. Treasure everything that you can hear and make sure you retain as much as you can. When my 17 y/o son talks, I still "hear" his 8 y/o voice. When my mother speaks, I still "hear" her strong voice, not the feeble one she has due to age and illness. If you are a music lover, be prepared for not hearing it. I "hear" songs from when I could hear and treasure them more and more.

But, most of all---- being total deaf IS NOT ISOLATING. In some ways, it can be liberating. I don't have to deal with the jerks on the road who constantly sit on their horns. I don't have to deal with the airplanes overhead. I did not have to deal with the petty arguments between 2 teenagers in my house.

It's better if you can learn to adapt and chose to accept it and not feel like it's an ordeal. I was lucky that I had the advance notice, so that I could mentally prepare myself. It was still a shock, and I have learned so much since then.
 
Mike: Exactly what are you doing right now- using a Hearing aid?

If you "arrive at becoming bilateral DEAF" would you consider a Cochlear Implant? Assuming the cost is one way or other "dealt with" and you are "suitable"? Not everybody can benefit from an Implant. This is from Sunnybrook/Toronto experience since 1984. Just 3000 persons "assessed" with 950 actually implanted. Of which 18 had no benefit.

Learning ASL is one way of dealing with being Bilateral DEAF however it does doesn't change the actual condition of " silence".

That is my very direct experience since I became bilateral DEAF- December 20, 2006

Use a lap top to key to persons who don't know/use ASL?

Good luck in whatever decision you arrive at.
 
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Dr Phil, sadly vestibular schwanomma is one of the specific cases where a cochlear implant will likely not work.

Mike, what was the cause of the total loss in the other ear? I'm hoping it's the 40 year variety in your good ear.
 
Mike, I lost all of my hearing overnight. As you can imagine, I was thrown into a world of silence with no warning and it was a total shock for my whole family. Interesting tho with technology my kids and I still talk every day with text, emails and my relay phone. My husband and I seem closer. To communicate we actually have to look at each other and be in the same room. Plus the people on this site have helped me tremendously. Learn ASL, I wish you the best of luck.
 
I am aware that there is a number of "conditions" hearing wise which means that a Cochlear Implant will not be "useful". Aside: Sunnybrook/Toronto has seen 3000 patients since-1984 and only 950 were "suitable". Info: patients meeting last November.

Thus it is imperative that one be "checked out" on all the conditions.

Computer screens -Google- don't allow one to "zero in" on their own specific condition.
Aside: some of the terms used- I never heard before. That is why I went- forthwith got to be "assessed ENT-wise" re possibility of Cochlear Implant.In my case-suitable
 
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