yankees
New Member
- Joined
- Nov 28, 2005
- Messages
- 297
- Reaction score
- 0
Here's the untold secret of married life....!!!
CASE 1
A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their
domestic
tranquility had long been the talk of the town. "What a peaceful &
loving
couple!" A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of
their
long and happy marriage.
"Well, it dates back to our honeymoon," explained the man. "We visited
the
Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom on the canyon by horse.
We
hadn't gone too far when my wife's horse stumbled. My wife quietly
said,
'That's once'.
We proceeded a little further and the horse stumbled again. Once more
my
wife quietly said,
'That's twice.'
"We hadn't gone a half-mile when the horse stumbled the third time.
My wife quietly removed a revolver from her purse and shot the horse
dead.
"I started an angry protest over her treatment to the horse, while I
was
shouting; She looked at me, and quietly said,
'That's once'. "
"........And we lived happily ever after."
CASE 2
The wife is busy frying eggs, when her husband comes home.
He walks into the kitchen and immediately starts yelling: "CAREFUL!!!
CAREFUL!!!
MORE OIL!!! TURN THEM!!! TURN THEM NOW!!! WE NEED MORE OIL!!! THEY ARE
GOING TO
STICK!!! CAREFUL!!! CAREFUL!!! TURN THEM!!! TURN THEM!!! HURRY UP!!!
ARE YOU
CRAZY!!!!
THE OIL IS GOING TO SPILL!!! USE MORE SALT!!! THE SALT!!!!"
The wife is very upset: "What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you
yelling like this? Do you think I don't know how to fry an egg?"
The husband calmly replies: "This is to show you what it feels like,
when
I am driving and you sit next to me..."
CASE 3
FEMALE HORMONES FOUND IN BEER
Scientists for Health UK suggested that, considering the results
of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones
in beer, men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones (as hops contain phytoeostrogens) and drinking it may turn meninto women. To test the theory, 100 men were given 6 pints of beer each to drink within a one hour period. It was then observedthat 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional,
couldn't drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing,
refused to apologize when obviously wrong, and had to sit down while urinating.
No further testing was considered necessary
CASE 1
A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their
domestic
tranquility had long been the talk of the town. "What a peaceful &
loving
couple!" A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of
their
long and happy marriage.
"Well, it dates back to our honeymoon," explained the man. "We visited
the
Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom on the canyon by horse.
We
hadn't gone too far when my wife's horse stumbled. My wife quietly
said,
'That's once'.
We proceeded a little further and the horse stumbled again. Once more
my
wife quietly said,
'That's twice.'
"We hadn't gone a half-mile when the horse stumbled the third time.
My wife quietly removed a revolver from her purse and shot the horse
dead.
"I started an angry protest over her treatment to the horse, while I
was
shouting; She looked at me, and quietly said,
'That's once'. "
"........And we lived happily ever after."
CASE 2
The wife is busy frying eggs, when her husband comes home.
He walks into the kitchen and immediately starts yelling: "CAREFUL!!!
CAREFUL!!!
MORE OIL!!! TURN THEM!!! TURN THEM NOW!!! WE NEED MORE OIL!!! THEY ARE
GOING TO
STICK!!! CAREFUL!!! CAREFUL!!! TURN THEM!!! TURN THEM!!! HURRY UP!!!
ARE YOU
CRAZY!!!!
THE OIL IS GOING TO SPILL!!! USE MORE SALT!!! THE SALT!!!!"
The wife is very upset: "What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you
yelling like this? Do you think I don't know how to fry an egg?"
The husband calmly replies: "This is to show you what it feels like,
when
I am driving and you sit next to me..."
CASE 3
FEMALE HORMONES FOUND IN BEER
Scientists for Health UK suggested that, considering the results
of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones
in beer, men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones (as hops contain phytoeostrogens) and drinking it may turn meninto women. To test the theory, 100 men were given 6 pints of beer each to drink within a one hour period. It was then observedthat 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional,
couldn't drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing,
refused to apologize when obviously wrong, and had to sit down while urinating.
No further testing was considered necessary
