talk interrupting sign

[tuatara]

I'm still getting overwhelmed, finding myself unprepared to deal with hearing people (I am hearing - I guess I should say hearing and non-signing) interrupting a conversation I'm having with Deaf friends. I was in a bar signing with one, and he was telling me something he really wanted me to know, and I was really interested knowing, and this hearing guy that we've kind of seen around jumped between us, facing me, and started talking to me. About something I had no interest in at all. It took me a couple seconds to get my bearings, but I finally said "Hey! I'm talking to him!" And he apologized, but I was still kind of pissed (it takes me a while to cool down sometimes.) I think he wasn't meaning to be a jerk, but while he's apologizing, I'm still not getting to finish listening to my friend. Finally I just kind of used body language to sort of manuever him out of the way and put my line of sight back on my friend, and he was able to finish what he wanted to say.

After all that, the guy said, as a sort of explanation as to why he interrupted, why he didn't realize he was interrupting a conversation at all: (wait for it)

"I didn't hear anything."

gaaaah!

This is a bar where a bunch of Deaf people have been going for years, the other people at the bar recognize them, say hi, they're familiar faces and people are used to seeing them signing. So it's not like it's from outer space to them or anything. Holy crap, you didn't hear anything. I just stared at him in amazement.

It's not like I was just staring into space with a bored look on my face like I was waiting for someone to talk to me. I was intently watching what he was saying, with the facial expressions that go with that.

I know I should be factoring alcohol into the equation- it was a bar. But for now I'm just SMH.

 

[saywhatkid]

Well, obviously this was rude behavior. However, look at it as a learning experience for both the hearing man, and for you. When you see this situation play out again, you will be better prepared.

I don't think it was totally intentional. You did mention this was at a bar. Perhaps Al Cohol was distracting him? Maybe he was "smitten" by looking at you?

 

[Bottesini]

How did he know you were a hearing person?

 

[tuatara]

Saywhatkid, you're absolutely right. I know Mr. Cohol was a big part of things - and the guy's tone wasn't rude. I was just really thrown. On some level I guess I need people to be more sensitive, and it'll never happen, so there's always an adjustment period for me when my needs come into contact with reality. The trick is trying to get that period to be shorter and shorter as I learn more tricks or get faster at reminding myself about what I'm dealing with.

Smitten? Maybe. Our friend Al makes us prettier and prettier all night.

And yeah, definitely a learning experience. For my part, I know I need to be better prepared, but I haven't yet figured out exactly how I want to respond to that sort of thing. (Although I think I'm starting to in the process of responding to your post. Thanks!) Maybe just put a hand up to indicate that I'm busy, point at my friend with the other hand to show what I'm busy with, scooch the guy out of the way if nec, and then he can wait until we're done.

 

[tuatara]

How did he know you were a hearing person?

I've been at this bar with this group of friends a few times before. And I'm not sure if I've talked to this particular hearing guy, but we've interacted with the crowd he runs with. My friends really impress me with how well they're able to communicate with hearing people (who don't sign), but sometimes they'll run into something they can't get across. Then they'll let me know they'd like me to voice something for them. And sometimes when that happens, there'll be a message that needs signed back, so I'll end up doing a very rough version of interpreting for a bit.

 

[saywhatkid]

Maybe just put a hand up to indicate that I'm busy, point at my friend with the other hand to show what I'm busy with, scooch the guy out of the way if nec, and then he can wait until we're done.

Yes. Put that hand up, tell the other person to wait. Make the "hold" sign to the person you are signing to first, then dispatch the interrupter with whatever communication method is needed.

 

[saywhatkid]

I've been at this bar with this group of friends a few times before. And I'm not sure if I've talked to this particular hearing guy, but we've interacted with the crowd he runs with. My friends really impress me with how well they're able to communicate with hearing people (who don't sign), but sometimes they'll run into something they can't get across. Then they'll let me know they'd like me to voice something for them. And sometimes when that happens, there'll be a message that needs signed back, so I'll end up doing a very rough version of interpreting for a bit.

Most deafs I know use paper and pen.

 

[tuatara]

Yes. Put that hand up, tell the other person to wait. Make the "hold" sign to the person you are signing to first, then dispatch the interrupter with whatever communication method is needed.

Right! Thank you. It's weird. I really have to think through this kind of thing, run it through my mind almost like practice. I get overwhelmed easily anyway (just the way I'm wired) and my head can sometimes end up feeling like it's tied in a big knot when there's more than one mode of communication coming at me at once (and I'm trying to use more than one in quick succession). I have no idea how the pro terps do it.

 

[tuatara]

Most deafs I know use paper and pen.

I think I'm just easier. They're standing around drinking and I'm right there and they can just tell me. Plus they know I'm dying to do something to pay them back for all the help they've given me with my signing, so it works out ok. And it's more practice for me which is great. As long as my head doesn't explode.

 

[saywhatkid]

Right! Thank you. It's weird. I really have to think through this kind of thing, run it through my mind almost like practice. I get overwhelmed easily anyway (just the way I'm wired) and my head can sometimes end up feeling like it's tied in a big knot when there's more than one mode of communication coming at me at once (and I'm trying to use more than one in quick succession). I have no idea how the pro terps do it.

Ask Reba.