*sigh*

candybrowneyes

candybrowneyes

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I can't help but feel a little depressed this Christmas. It is much of the same feeling I had at Thanksgiving and whenever I am around any friends and family.

My hearing took a nose dive in Sept. And all of my friends and family are all hearing (with the exception of a few deaf friends). I knew at some point this was going to happen. By "this" i mean because I wear aids they assume I can hear everything and there will be a point where I lose all hearing but it seems as though none of them want to understand that.

My mom makes remarks that really hurt my feelings because some days I cannot hear anything and others I am alright with my aids, having Menieres, sometimes episodes control my days, which they all do not understand either. I have written blogs, and emails to friends and family to help them understand what I go through but its like they shake if off because they dont want to understand the reality of it :(

I have grown accustomed to asking people to repeat themselves, asking them to look at me when they are speaking so I can see what they are saying. Only to get remarks like "do you know how hard this is for me" or "You aren't full deaf yet, YOU CAN hear that." I mean do they understand how hard it is for me if they think its hard for them??? And I may not be full deaf yet but I do not hear everything correctly and I miss things, and its so hard for me to try to explain that to EVERYONE I know.

I have a few deaf friends but I never get to see them. My life has changed so much since hearing loss that sometimes it gets me so frustrated I don't want to see my friends or family.

Does anyone else go through this with their family and friends? Its Christmas and I sit back and watch because I have a hard time hearing with all of the people and kids screaming..... it just kinda gets me down because no one has done anything to learn ASL to help me with anything, I feel so alone in this....
 
oh man.

I know a couple of people who are late-deafened.

They hold a piece of my heart just because of this. Cedar Rapids has an alright deaf community - I used to be in Iowa a lot.

Let me know if I can help any in PM's.
 
posts from hell said:
oh man.

I know a couple of people who are late-deafened.

They hold a piece of my heart just because of this. Cedar Rapids has an alright deaf community - I used to be in Iowa a lot.

Let me know if I can help any in PM's.
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yes I have met a couple people who are willing to get me into deaf community here :) thank you.
A lot of deaf do not understand how hard it is to transition between 2 worlds. I feel like I am in limbo. The deaf community has a hard time understanding and the hearing also. But if you want to suggest anything to me i am always opened to it... I know they have deaf coffee chats at starbucks and they do a dinner every week as well.
 
Yeah.
The transition is the most difficult part.

There will be a lot of prejudice going on on both sides, and this is the part I refer to "HOH" world. Where a person is stuck between the hearing world not FULLY accepting them, or the Deaf world not fully accepting them.

Once you establish yourself as a DEAF person I think things will be better, but again I've been deaf all my life and I wouldn't know any other way.

The reasons for this:
You will gain respect from others by saying, "Hey boy, I'm Deaf." as opposed to "I can hear a little, but i will need to have you speaking to me in the front of me, so on , so on"

Deaf people would accept you more, which is the sad truth.

There are many more things I can go into, but right now I have not much of positive news to tell you, other than you do have an edge - you're cute. Which is a sad news in itself in our judgmental society.
 
An interpreter who loved her career found she was losing hearing in one ear and went got CI. Said it was the worst thing.

FYI.
 
i'm late deafened and have bilateral ci's. although i primarily chose to be implanted for my own personal safety as a totally deafblind person, i have been delighted at how much my ci's have opened up the world of communication to me. i still struggle in background noise, but nowhere near as much as i did pre-ci. if you're interested in ci's and have any questions about them, please feel free to ask here or send me a message under my profile.
 
Even though I've been HI for most of my life I still find this in my family. My Dad and sister are good about it even though I need to remind them of something every once in a while. My brother will flat out refuse to speak to me besides the essential short sentences every once in a while and my Mom is just blatantly rude and inconsiderate. I keep asking her to speak up, face me, get my attention, and quit chewing/covering her mouth when she talks and she'll do it for maybe one sentence then revert. If I continue to ask her to do it every time she stops she starts getting bitchy and whines about how everything is about me and she's doing all she can to stop eating wheat thins while holding a conversation. Anytime I make a mistake because of my HI she insists that it's my fault and starts chewing me out, example from a week ago

Sister: My teacher says I need to ask about how animals adapt.
(Mom starts speaking unknown to me)
Me: You need to know what they're adapting to if you want to know how they adapt.
Mom: I WAS TALKING TO HER AND YOU INTERRUPTED ME! GOD-DAMNIT I DON'T GET ANY RESPECT AROUND HERE ESPECIALLY FROM YOU INGRATEFUL CHILD!
Me: I'm sorry I'm hearing impaired. Any other acts of God you'd like to blame on me?
Mom: YOU CAN'T USE THAT LITTLE EXCUSE FOR EVERYTHING! YOU HAFTA TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF!

I'll enjoy it when I'm gone. :roll:

I guess what you could do is try to explain to everybody that having a little bit of hearing isn't the same as having full hearing, and that you aren't asking them to do things because it's "fun" and you "want attention", but I assume you've already done this to some extent. Personally right now I would tell everybody I'm completely deaf and mail them all an ASL book. Then I'd call them inconsiderate for not caring enough to learn a new language to talk to you. Wish there was a real solution for all this though.
 
Mockingbird said:
I guess what you could do is try to explain to everybody that having a little bit of hearing isn't the same as having full hearing, and that you aren't asking them to do things because it's "fun" and you "want attention", but I assume you've already done this to some extent. Personally right now I would tell everybody I'm completely deaf and mail them all an ASL book. Then I'd call them inconsiderate for not caring enough to learn a new language to talk to you. Wish there was a real solution for all this though.
Click to expand...

Trust me, I have. I have posted bulletins on myspace, blogs, and I have sent personal emails to people that actually matter in my life. Its the smart ass comments that they say that drive me nuts. I have always used humor in my life so they think that making jokes is the way to go and its not even when I have told them that. It is hard for them to understand how I feel and when I am real upset about it they dont get it... Guess its something I should get used to.....
 
wow. I am not too sure how to help you in that situation without seeing what you're going through.

perhaps meeting other late deafened people to discuss stuff? I could hook you up with that!
 
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