Redneck Vasectomy
After having their 11th child, a Redneck couple decided that was
enough, as they could not afford a larger bed. So the husband
went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin
didn't want to have any more children.
The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy
that could fix the problem but that it was expensive. "A less
costly alternative," said the doctor, "is to go home, get a
cherry bomb, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up
to your ear and count to 10."
The Redneck said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest tool
in the shed, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer
can next to my ear is going to help me."
"Trust me," said the doctor.
So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can.
He held the can up to his ear and began to count: "1" "2" "3" "4"
"5" At which point he paused, placed the beer can between his
legs and resumed counting on his other hand.
This procedure works in Alabama, Tennessee, Louisiana, Kentucky,
Arkansas, Mississippi, West Virginia and some parts of Texas.
After having their 11th child, a Redneck couple decided that was
enough, as they could not afford a larger bed. So the husband
went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin
didn't want to have any more children.
The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy
that could fix the problem but that it was expensive. "A less
costly alternative," said the doctor, "is to go home, get a
cherry bomb, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up
to your ear and count to 10."
The Redneck said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest tool
in the shed, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer
can next to my ear is going to help me."
"Trust me," said the doctor.
So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can.
He held the can up to his ear and began to count: "1" "2" "3" "4"
"5" At which point he paused, placed the beer can between his
legs and resumed counting on his other hand.
This procedure works in Alabama, Tennessee, Louisiana, Kentucky,
Arkansas, Mississippi, West Virginia and some parts of Texas.
And I have visited that area (near the Crestview, FL area -- lots of woods!!). 
