Fighting to be deaf

K

Kar

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Hello
I have been going deaf most of my life. I wear hearing aids even though I am moderately severe. I hate them they make everything so loud I get a headache. Everyone says turn the volume down then what's the point of wearing them. my family gets upset that I can't hear them or they have to repeat things, I am comfotable being almost deaf but hate being told I have to function as a hearing person when I can't. Does anyone else have this problem
 
You could tell your family to write things down so they'll not have to repeat.
Does it if someone face you while talking and you try to read their lips? Or get your family to learn ASL with you.
 
Kar said:
Hello
I have been going deaf most of my life. I wear hearing aids even though I am moderately severe. I hate them they make everything so loud I get a headache. Everyone says turn the volume down then what's the point of wearing them. my family gets upset that I can't hear them or they have to repeat things, I am comfotable being almost deaf but hate being told I have to function as a hearing person when I can't. Does anyone else have this problem
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You are not alone. We all go through that struggling with the hearing society and our hearing parents. It sucks when they wanted something from us to do their bidding as a hearing person who we are not.

:welcome: to AllDeaf Forum. I hope you stay and have fun reading and posting with us. :wave:
 
Bebonang said:
You are not alone. We all go through that struggling with the hearing society and our hearing parents. It sucks when they wanted something from us to do their bidding as a hearing person who we are not.

:welcome: to AllDeaf Forum. I hope you stay and have fun reading and posting with us. :wave:
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You got that right ! My mom would talk to me when I had my back to her and this was when I just had told her I can't hear what she is saying .
My mom had very good hearing and could not understand what it was like to be HOH. I think b/c people can't tell we're deaf or hoh by looking at us they
feel that we're joking or lying about it.
 
Kar: would a "discussion" with your audi re:your hearing aid being "set" at a level you find uncomfortable and how to "fix"?
Also, ongoing feedback at any situation you don't "hear" within your family? Do "they" understand you in what you say re: NOT hearing them?

aside: the above came from the Canadian Hearing Society/Toronto classes: Dealing with your Hearing loss.

Good luck in achieving some "hearing peace".
 
drphil said:
Kar: would a "discussion" with your audi re:your hearing aid being "set" at a level you find uncomfortable and how to "fix"?
Also, ongoing feedback at any situation you don't "hear" within your family? Do "they" understand you in what you say re: NOT hearing them?

aside: the above came from the Canadian Hearing Society/Toronto classes: Dealing with your Hearing loss.

Good luck in achieving some "hearing peace".
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what's that?
 
If you noticed I used "quotation marks" around "hearing peace". It was deliberate.

How one can actualize "adjustments" in real life-up to you-write?speechread?
The accpetance of others re:" your hearing loss" and what to do.
 
I'm sorry you're having issues with your family. :( I will say, that by coming here and reading Deaf adults' experiences solidifies my own decisions on how to raise my Deaf son. I would NEVER want him to feel as you are now. :(
 
Have you told your audi that your HA are making sounds too loud for you to be able to wear them comfortably. You should not be getting headaches from your hearing aids. I think you should go back to your audi and see if you need to have the your HA reprogramed , my are programed on my audi computer . It would be great if you get a family member to go with so you could see how their voice sound . I the only having my audi voice to go by .
 
Anyone else here experienced:
Becoming more and more deaf/HOH but because you don't 'yet' wear hearing aids people have problems believing you can't hear.
Then, years later finally getting hearing aids but people have problems believing wearing them hasnt 'cured' your deafness!

Its basically like justifying yourself over and over again.
 
Hearing people understand deafness, they just don't understand that there are degrees of deafness. They believe if you understood the last sentence then you must understand the next sentence. The inability to understand there exist a lack of continuity in hearing is what causes people to believe someone is not deaf.

You can't blame them, they've never experienced it. They don't know what it is like to hear the first sentence and not hear the next three sentences(in the majority of conversations).
 
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People that have good hearing basically think all people who have hearing aids can hear as well as they do, because in their mind HA's are like glasses and they must make it so you can hear perfectly. It's very hard to get them to understand that HA's help but don't cure your hearing loss. Kar, I also think you should go to your audi and see if they can adjust the volume and the settings to see if you can hear better and I would also take a family member along so they can talk to your audi and maybe they will understand what you are going through if the audi tells them.
 
VacationGuy234 said:
Hearing people understand deafness, they just don't understand that there are hdegrees of deafness. They believe if you understood the last sentence then you must understand the next sentence. The inability to understand there exist a lack of continuity in hearing is what causes people to believe someone is not deaf.

You can't blame them, they've never experienced it. They don't know what it is like to hear the first sentence and not hear the next three sentences(in the majority of conversations).
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I had made phone calls and told the person I am hoh and I can't hear them and they'll say " But I can hear you just fine!" I disagree with this b/c this has happen with more than one person . I will tell the person how does that help me you'll being able to hear me .. I think some hearing people just do not understand what deaf or hoh mean period .
 
whatdidyousay! said:
I had made phone calls and told the person I am hoh and I can't hear them and they'll say " But I can hear you just fine!" I disagree with this b/c this has happen with more than one person . I will tell the person how does that help me you'll being able to hear me .. I think some hearing people just do not understand what deaf or hoh mean period .
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I agree with you, I have several friends who have really good hearing and are also soft talkers and struggled to hear them on the phone and when I would ask them to speak up they would say they could hear me just fine and would briefly talk a little louder and then drift off back to their soft talking. One thing I have learned is that people with really good hearing are basically incapable of ever understanding what it's like to have a hearing problem since they have never had a problem hearing anything. Once I got my streamer and was able to hear the call in both ears the problem of hearing these type of people on the phone has gone away.
 
seb said:
I agree with you, I have several friends who have really good hearing and are also soft talkers and struggled to hear them on the phone and when I would ask them to speak up they would say they could hear me just fine and would briefly talk a little louder and then drift off back to their soft talking. One thing I have learned is that people with really good hearing are basically incapable of ever understanding what it's like to have a hearing problem since they have never had a problem hearing anything. Once I got my streamer and was able to hear the call in both ears the problem of hearing these type of people on the phone has gone away.
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My mother had very good hearing and she was forever trying to talk to me when I had my back to her . I would tell her not do that and she would do it again a minute later. It was hard being the only hoh person in my family .
 
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