Socrates -- great thread u started here girl! 
it is very thought provoking and from what the members here have posted on their thoughts, i realized some comments i have said in the past may have been "negative-enabling" and ive not realized that til i read this 
i would try and give suggestions to the best of my abilities without being enabling in a negative way which sometimes can be challenging when it comes to some types of ppl who seems to have the attitude of know-it-all or something similar to that and they would become a bit more argumentive for no apparent reason
