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You can see the Eiffel Tower in the upper right-hand corner. :smash:

I will be 5 in December.

Is it the capital city of my blessed Fatherland? :aw:

So aside from some obvious anger management issues, what's my major malfunction? :popcorn:

Why don’t you ask that relay operator wearing the Barbie backpack? The one with the Zuni fetish doll chasing after him. :squint:

I think you should go molest a kangaroo. :roll:

This from a guy who embraces the culture that gave us Air Supply and Olivia Newton-John. :roll:

What’s up with this weird fixation you have for rhinos? :crazy:

Where does that leave me? In case you haven't noticed, I don't have an ass.

Forget what I said. Thorazine and haloperidol for everybody—you guys need it. :crazy:

I am alone in the universe. :tears:

If you go back and read the OP, you’ll see that the entire point of this thread is that I don’t have any friends, because nobody here respects vibrators or considers them worthy of befriending. :mad:

Here are George Carlin’s seven words you can never say on TV—let’s see what the AD obscenity filter does with them: shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, tits. ETA: what are you guys smoking? Works fine for me. :dunno:

Forget the thorazine and the haloperidol—somebody just needs a good old-fashioned smart pill. :squint:

I smell a Darwin Award (posthumous, 'natch) for the young lad.

Bite me, you pompous jackass. :rl:

Are you HIGH or something? :roll: I will be recognized as the supreme deity of all these different sects. I'll let you in on a little secret. I'm the only sentient vibrator in existence. Every other vibrator in the universe is simply an inanimate piece of plastic. ;)

I wuv wuv wuv yoooo... :hug:

Oh don't EVEN get me started on that damn dog. What the hell do you feed that beast, anyway? I swear his breath would knock a buzzard off a shit truck.