![]() |
|
|||||
|
|
|
|
__________________
This advertising will not be shown in this way to registered members. Register your free account today and become a member on AllDeaf.com |
|
|
|
#10 (permalink) |
|
The Prodigy Child
|
Barack Obama says he will bitch-slap McCain/Palin in upcoming public debate
__________________
![]() "Life is a game. The only thing that matters is whether you're a pawn or a player." -Ambassador Laquatus "Tell me...What do you cherish the most? Will you give me the pleasure of taking it away from you? -Sephiroth "Some men just want to watch the world burn..."- Alfred "Do you want to know why I use a knife? You see, guns are too quick. You can't savor all of the little...emotions. In their last moments, people show you who they really are."- The Joker |
|
|
|
|
|
#14 (permalink) | |
|
I love Toby
|
Quote:
__________________
"Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart." Anne Frank GO PIRATES! Pensacola Junior College
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
#16 (permalink) | |
|
I love Toby
|
Quote:
__________________
"Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart." Anne Frank GO PIRATES! Pensacola Junior College
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
#19 (permalink) |
|
I love Toby
|
I am 18 yrs old. I am behind on politics but since my college professor mention politics jokes and I thought, hmmm i just make thread about that.
__________________
"Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart." Anne Frank GO PIRATES! Pensacola Junior College
|
|
|
|
|
|
#24 (permalink) |
|
I love Toby
|
Late-Night Jokes about the 2008 Presidential Candidates
"Barack Obama sent out a cell phone text message at 3 a.m. on Saturday morning to tell everybody he picked Joe Biden as his vice president. How do you think this makes Hillary Clinton feel? Finally gets a phone call at 3 a.m., and it's to tell her they picked Joe Biden." --Jay Leno
"People are now talking about the ticket, Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. Would that be a good ticket? And I think this would be the first, if you think about it, first combination of an African American man and a white woman since, well, Michael Jackson." --David Letterman "Now that Barack Obama is the Democratic nominee, Americans are going to have to choose between the 46-year-old Obama and the 71-year-old John McCain. That's the choice. In other words, it's a choice between the Hillary-defeater or the Wal-Mart greeter." --Conan O'Brien "Of course, everyone is wondering now if Obama will ask Hillary to be his running mate. Obama actually tried to call her last night, and got her voicemail twice. I guess she only takes calls at 3:00 a.m. It was also probably hard to hear the phone over the sound of over her husband weeping." --Jimmy Kimmel "According to a new poll, Barack Obama has a 24-point lead over Hillary Clinton in North Carolina. Obama is doing particularly well with one important demographic: voters." --Amy Poehler Hillary Clinton attacked Barack Obama, called him 'elitist,' and said he was out of touch with poor people. Later, Bill Clinton gave a speech on the subject, and charged a million bucks for it." --Jay Leno "All three presidential candidates appeared on 'American Idol.' It was interesting. Randy Jackson, Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell looked at them and said, 'Wait, there's a black guy, a woman and a cranky white guy. You stole our formula!'" --Conan O'Brien "After Governor Bill Richardson switched his support from Hillary Clinton to Barack Obama last week, an angry Bill Clinton said, 'Five times to my face he said he would never do that.' Wow, so he looked you right in the face and lied to you. What's that like?" --Seth Meyers "McCain came out this week with a list of 20 possible running mates. He would not reveal the names of all of them, but he said they all share certain traits, like knowing CPR. He said he wants someone who is ready take over on day two." --Bill Maher "Big shake-up in the Hillary Clinton campaign. This is huge. Yesterday -- true story -- Hillary Clinton's top adviser abruptly left her campaign. When he heard about it, Bill Clinton said, 'Wait, we can leave?'" --Conan O'Brien "John McCain is now crisscrossing the United States campaigning. Or, as they're calling it, Antiques Roadshow." --Jay Leno "Hillary Clinton was in Philadelphia, where she told the crowd she is like the movie character Rocky. Now, if I remember the movie correctly, doesn't Rocky get the crap beat out of him and then he loses to the black guy?" --Jay Leno "Are you familiar with the Hillary Clinton 3 a.m. phone call commercial that she's been running? … Well, she's got another one of those, and the phone rings at 3 a.m., Hillary answers the phone, she picks it up, and she says "Stop bothering me, President Obama!" –David Letterman "And John McCain has one of those 3 a.m. campaign commercials. In this one it's 3 a.m. and he just gets up to go to the bathroom." –David Letterman "We're leaning more and more about John and Cindy McCain. He's on this big biography tour. I guess his wife Cindy is worth over $100 million because the family made money selling Budweiser beer. So he has a wife 20 years younger than him, free beer, and unlimited money. I think I speak for all guys when I go, 'Why is he running for president?'" --Jay Leno "This weekend, Bill Clinton said Hillary should not drop out of the presidential race. Yeah, when asked why, Bill said, 'Because then she'd come home.'" --Conan O'Brien "Hillary now says that she just made an honest mistake when she said she had to duck sniper fire in Bosnia. There was no hostile fire of any kind. Although, ironically, while she was away, Bill Clinton did see some action." --Jay Leno "Barack Obama called Hillary today to thank her for distracting everyone away from the whole crazy pastor thing. Obama's campaign is all about hope -- hope Hillary keeps saying stupid crap and getting herself in trouble." --Craig Ferguson Two State Department employees were fired -- this is a bit of a scandal -- because they were looking at Barack Obama's passport file. Not only that, but the same person was also looking at John McCain's Civil War records." --David Letterman "I like John McCain. He looks like the guy who gets frisky with the new waitress at IHOP. ... He looks like the guy who watches his Cadillac go through the car wash. ... He looks like the guy in the supermarket yelling into his cell phone, 'I'm in aisle three, Marge. I can't find the brownie mix.'" --David Letterman (Read more of Letterman's jabs at Old Man McCain) "Barack Obama gave a big speech on race, and there was one heckler in the audience, kept screaming crazy stuff the whole time. Turns out it was his pastor." --Jay Leno "This campaign is kind of fascinating, because the three major candidates have to be very careful when they criticize each other. Like, you can't criticize Hillary. Ooh, that's sexism. You can't criticize Barack. Ooh, that's racism. And you can't go after McCain, because that's elder abuse." --Jay Leno ~Compiled by Daniel Kurtzman I look it up online. Find it funny.
__________________
"Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart." Anne Frank GO PIRATES! Pensacola Junior College
|
|
|
|
|
|
#25 (permalink) |
|
Burn fat off your soul
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: North Island in the South
Posts: 1,008
|
Typical fucken american politics, and i hate to say in the west, everybody's copying the american style , and frankly I havent a faintest idea why, it's just a big sideshow distracting from the real issues government should be dealing with, and relating with the public on what to do. Squabbling about scandels and all seems to tell me, that anyone can get on the game if they have savvy, but the competition is so cut-throat like almost as if they'd get away with murder.
__________________
It's like you go to the beach. It's a little cold. You're not sure you want to go in. There's a pretty girl standing next to you. She doesn't want to go in either. She sees you, and you know that if you just asked her her name, you would leave with her. Forget your life, whoever you came with, and leave the beach with her. And after that day, you remember. Not every day, every week... she comes back to you. It's the memory of another life you could have had. Today is that girl. |
|
|
|