Students, Your questions answered here.

Falkyn said:
Hello there everyone!

I am a hearing student at a four-year university in southern California, and I am currently taking a class on cross-cultural psychology. One of our assignments is to interview someone (or multiple people) from another culture and make an informal presentation about their culture to the class. As we don't have any deaf/hard of hearing (hoh) students in our school, and I am interested in becoming a teacher/translator at a deaf school in Mexico post-graduation, I thought it would be awesome to educate my peers about deaf culture and learn more myself! Anyone out there willing to answer a few questions for me? If so, please respond to the following questions in a comment below! You will have my eternal gratitude, and a great number of brownie/cool points.

1. Are you deaf or hard-of-hearing?

2. If not, how did you become a part of a deaf/hoh community? If so, how long have you been a part of the deaf/hoh community?

3. What country do you live in? If you live in the US, what state?

4. What does your community look like? I.E. are you part of a deaf/hoh family, school, club, etc.? (If you are the only deaf/hoh person in your immediate acquaintance, feel free to skip question 5.)

5. What is unique about your deaf/hoh culture? In other words, are there any traditions, shared values, or activities (besides using sign language) that set you apart from the hearing communities in your area?

6. How are the deaf/hoh viewed by the hearing in your country/state/area?

7. How does the hearing community in general treat your culture? Are they usually respectful, or are you often misunderstood/mistreated?

8. What is the most culturally sensitive (appropriate/polite) way for a hearing person to interact with a deaf/hoh person when starting a conversation?

9. (Optional) What is the worst experience you have had while interacting with someone from a hearing culture?

10. (Optional) What is the best experience you have had while interacting with someone from a hearing culture?

11. If you could get all of those in the hearing community to listen to you for one moment, what would you tell them? (This is less of a formal question, and more of an opportunity for you to add any information or opinions that the previous questions did not allow for.)

Thank you so VERY much for your time and your responses! This is a huge part of my grade, plus I am genuinely interested in your answers, so this means the world to me! You rock!
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I had this removed from here once, but this time just leave it and other students can read this response.

This thread is not here for me or anyone else to do your homework, which your teacher expects you to do in person out in your own community.

These surveys have been answered multiple times, and any student who wants to cheat their teacher, should just search the forum and use those answers.

The student surveys are pretty much the same, year after year.

And there is no need to argue with me.

This is a final answer.
 
Actually Bottesini, my teacher ENCOURAGED me to use an online forum to ask my questions. I mentioned to her that a lot of the questions were already answered in previous posts, but she said that I had to get someone to reply to me personally, otherwise she would have to count the assignment as a literature review. Thanks for assuming that I'm a cheater, stupid, or that I didn't read previous posts instead of contacting me about it personally, though. Real nice of you.

To anyone else out there, I would really love a response to these questions! As stated previously, I am aware that the answers are already out there, but a personal response is required for this assignment. It would only take a few minutes, and I would GREATLY appreciate it!!! If you don't want to post answers on here, please feel free to contact me at my student email address, tguinn@sdcc.edu. Thank you!
 
Falkyn said:
Actually Bottesini, my teacher ENCOURAGED me to use an online forum to ask my questions. I mentioned to her that a lot of the questions were already answered in previous posts, but she said that I had to get someone to reply to me personally, otherwise she would have to count the assignment as a literature review. Thanks for assuming that I'm a cheater, stupid, or that I didn't read previous posts instead of contacting me about it personally, though. Real nice of you.

To anyone else out there, I would really love a response to these questions! As stated previously, I am aware that the answers are already out there, but a personal response is required for this assignment. It would only take a few minutes, and I would GREATLY appreciate it!!! If you don't want to post answers on here, please feel free to contact me at my student email address, tguinn@sdcc.edu. Thank you!
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Not in this thread. That is not the purpose.
 
Falkyn said:
Actually Bottesini, my teacher ENCOURAGED me to use an online forum to ask my questions. I mentioned to her that a lot of the questions were already answered in previous posts, but she said that I had to get someone to reply to me personally, otherwise she would have to count the assignment as a literature review. Thanks for assuming that I'm a cheater, stupid, or that I didn't read previous posts instead of contacting me about it personally, though. Real nice of you.

To anyone else out there, I would really love a response to these questions! As stated previously, I am aware that the answers are already out there, but a personal response is required for this assignment. It would only take a few minutes, and I would GREATLY appreciate it!!! If you don't want to post answers on here, please feel free to contact me at my student email address, tguinn@sdcc.edu. Thank you!
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What if my boss told me to go into your house and steal something? It would still be wrong, right? What if I pointed out to him that you don't want me to steal your stuff, and in fact that it's against the law? Maybe he answers that if I don't do it he'll fire me for insubordination. So now is it ok?

So you found this place. Members of this community have been very clear that they don't want you to engage in particular behaviors here. Other members have given you some evidence that this is the prevailing feeling here about that sort of behavior. But your teacher told you to do it. And you pressed your teacher on this, but she said that if you don't do it, you won't get credit for a particular assignment, and that will presumably hurt your grade. So does that make it ok?

If you think it does, why don't you just give me your address, a schedule of when you'll be out of the house, maybe leave the door unlocked? I don't want to get fired.
 
Falkyn said:
Actually Bottesini, my teacher ENCOURAGED me to use an online forum to ask my questions. I mentioned to her that a lot of the questions were already answered in previous posts, but she said that I had to get someone to reply to me personally, otherwise she would have to count the assignment as a literature review. Thanks for assuming that I'm a cheater, stupid, or that I didn't read previous posts instead of contacting me about it personally, though. Real nice of you.

To anyone else out there, I would really love a response to these questions! As stated previously, I am aware that the answers are already out there, but a personal response is required for this assignment. It would only take a few minutes, and I would GREATLY appreciate it!!! If you don't want to post answers on here, please feel free to contact me at my student email address, tguinn@sdcc.edu. Thank you!
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I'm really surprised at your teacher's request/command. I'm an ITP graduate, and I've also observed ASL classes other than my own. I've never known any of the instructors to give an internet forum assignment. If there was any "interviewing" to be done, it had to be done in person. How else would you really know if the interviewee was deaf?

Relying on a web forum for answers is like using Wikipedia for a term paper. It just ain't done. It's good to read AD responses for background and a sense of the community but it will never take the place of live interaction with the deaf community.
 
I would like to amend my previous post. After I posted, I searched for the original post from Falkyn for better understanding of the situation.

I have a question for Falkyn.

This is a class about all different kinds of cultures, not just deaf culture, correct? Are the students who are querying the other cultures also depending on internet contact, or are they meeting people face-to-face?

That is, if you wanted to ask an Asian or Hispanic about their respective cultures, how would you go about that?
 
Falkyn said:
Actually Bottesini, my teacher ENCOURAGED me to use an online forum to ask my questions. I mentioned to her that a lot of the questions were already answered in previous posts, but she said that I had to get someone to reply to me personally, otherwise she would have to count the assignment as a literature review. Thanks for assuming that I'm a cheater, stupid, or that I didn't read previous posts instead of contacting me about it personally, though. Real nice of you.

To anyone else out there, I would really love a response to these questions! As stated previously, I am aware that the answers are already out there, but a personal response is required for this assignment. It would only take a few minutes, and I would GREATLY appreciate it!!! If you don't want to post answers on here, please feel free to contact me at my student email address, tguinn@sdcc.edu. Thank you!
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I do not see what difference it made if you just uses the answers that are already here. Your teacher is not thinking about the members of this forum , we're not here to answer the same questions over and over . I don't think your teacher would like having us emailing her/him and asking them the same thing over and over. You have no idea how many people used this forum to do their homework. The forum was not setup for this reason . You need to made it very clear to your teacher we're not responsible for you getting a bad grade.
 
Bottesini: If the thread for student questions isn't the place for me to request answers, then please redirect me to a place where I can post my questions without being attacked. I was directed to THIS thread by another mod.

amylynne: This thread is supposed to be a place for student questions, which implies that asking questions is welcomed by the community. In addition, your metaphor has two major flaws: in the first place, asking for answers is not against the law. Stealing is. Secondly, stealing is forced upon the victims. I am not forcing anyone to answer my questions, simply asking for information. Answering is completely optional. And there are no victims here; just an interested student and... well, I was hoping for someone to be interested in enlightening me on deaf culture. It appears as though everyone just wants to lambast me instead. So much for "Students, your questions answered here".

Reba: Thank you for your questions. Yes, there are other students who are interviewing people of various cultures over the internet; I believe the students who chose Korean and Middle Eastern cultures are doing so, possibly others as well.

I go to a very small school with no attending deaf students, and I have no transportation (whereby to access a deaf community), or any deaf friends or family. Therefore, requesting assistance on this forum is basically my only hope of getting answers to my questions. I could have chosen any culture to interview and present on, and there are multicultural students at my school whom I could have turned to. I chose deaf culture because I am aware of how little my peers know of it, and because it is of personal interest to me as I plan to intern at a deaf school in Mexico post-graduation. I was sincerely hoping that more people would be forthcoming in educating me on their culture. It saddens me that a community that presents itself as open to questions and willing to help educate the clueless would react with such strong negativity when an eager students presents an interest in learning.
 
whatdidyousay!: Sorry, didn't see your post before I wrote my last reply. And yes, I do realize that some of my questions are repetitive of questions previously asked. However, there were questions on my list which I did not find an answer to on previous posts (yes, I have searched previous questions - I'm not simply ignoring old information). And don't worry, I take full responsibility for my own grades. My teacher has actually extended the due date for me because she is so interested in learning about your responses to these questions! Also (and I don't mean this to come off rude, so please don't take it that way; this is a sincere question), does this forum notify you every time a new question is asked? You make it sound as though you are being personally bothered every time a student asks a question which has been answered previously... if so, I apologize. I was under the impression that this was an open forum, and that no member was forced to read or answer questions posted here... but if I am wrong, please let me know.
 
Falkyn said:
This thread is supposed to be a place for student questions, which implies that asking questions is welcomed by the community. In addition, your metaphor has two major flaws: in the first place, asking for answers is not against the law. Stealing is. Secondly, stealing is forced upon the victims. I am not forcing anyone to answer my questions, simply asking for information. Answering is completely optional. And there are no victims here; just an interested student and... well, I was hoping for someone to be interested in enlightening me on deaf culture. It appears as though everyone just wants to lambast me instead. So much for "Students, your questions answered here".
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There's no flaw. It's an analogy: it's not meant to be an exact replica of every detail of the situation. The point is: there's something you want to do. It's not ok to do it here. Someone told you to do it, and presented negative ramifications for you if you don't. That doesn't change anything: it's still not ok to do it here.

And I believe you've misunderstood the thread title. It's not "your questions answered here" as in "feel free to ask your survey questions". It's "your questions answered here" as in "Your questions have very likely already been answered on this forum. In this thread we direct you to some of the places where that has happened. Please stop asking them." This is my understanding: it's Botti's thread, so she can correct me if I've misunderstood as well.
 
To Falkyn:

I'm sitting here trying to figure out why I'm so angry with you, over something that's really up to each person on the forum, if they want to answer you or not. Your approach offends me a little, but not nearly enough to explain the rage your message is inspiring in me.

And really, it's not about how much it is or isn't ok to ask your questions.

It's really just the idea of having someone tell you that something isn't appreciated here, in this context, and you coming back with "my teacher told me to". I just really want you to see that that what your teacher says has absolutely no bearing on whether something is acceptable in a culture that you've entered.

It makes me think of scenes where the police break into someone's house, thinking the person was hiding something, and turn the place upside down, and once they realize they had the wrong guy, do nothing to compensate the person for the trauma, inconvenience and damage. If they guy complains, they'll say something like "We're just doing our job." Doesn't make it ok. Legal maybe, but not ok.

I would think that a really great report, if your teacher really is giving you this kind of misguided instruction, would be to write about what you've discovered here. Throw out *all* the questions, have some balls, and go a different direction. Explain that you learned that the Deaf community is, in large part, comprised of people who take pride in themselves and in their lives. They place value on their time and energy. They are not waiting around eagerly to answer the survey questions of every student who crosses their path. Some of them are less than thrilled with the assumption that they'd be interested in doing this, or that it would be appropriate for them to do it without any sort of compensation. Then tell your teacher what you've learned by reading all those old posts you've been studying. Tell her that you've learned that this is much more respectful of the community that you've attempted to enter. Explain why.

And yeah, you still haven't done an interview. She can still penalize you for that. There are ways to get them, or at least vastly improve your chances. I think you still need to figure out what they are. It's all in the forum. I explained this stuff in detail to a very unfortunate aspiring anthropologist a while back.

Falkyn said:
Bottesini: If the thread for student questions isn't the place for me to request answers, then please redirect me to a place where I can post my questions without being attacked.
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This wasn't directed to me, but I cannot resist, especially since you love my analogies so much. Anyway, I was thinking of breaking into your kitchen. No? Ok, geeze, don't get so upset. Please direct me to the room you'd like me to break into.

What? You don't want me to break into *any* room in your house? (are you catching the analogy this time?)
 
Falkyn said:
whatdidyousay!: Sorry, didn't see your post before I wrote my last reply. And yes, I do realize that some of my questions are repetitive of questions previously asked. However, there were questions on my list which I did not find an answer to on previous posts (yes, I have searched previous questions - I'm not simply ignoring old information). And don't worry, I take full responsibility for my own grades. My teacher has actually extended the due date for me because she is so interested in learning about your responses to these questions! Also (and I don't mean this to come off rude, so please don't take it that way; this is a sincere question), does this forum notify you every time a new question is asked? You make it sound as though you are being personally bothered every time a student asks a question which has been answered previously... if so, I apologize. I was under the impression that this was an open forum, and that no member was forced to read or answer questions posted here... but if I am wrong, please let me know.
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Your teacher need to realize we're not lab rats to be study by every students that has to assignment to do about the deaf culture. You have no idea how many times we been asked to answer questions or do a survey about why, how, or when we lost our hearing etc. This why Botti took her time to made this thread and she did not have to do it . Yes it's an open forum but you do have understand people get tired of students coming here at the last moment to finish their homework and want us to do it for them.
I am sure there are deaf and HOH people where you live that you could talk or text to and you would get a lot more by being face to face than computer to computer. Your teacher should get out and meet some deaf and HOH their self they would lean a lot more this way too.
 
whatdidyousay! said:
Your teacher need to realize we're not lab rats to be study by every students that has to assignment to do about the deaf culture. You have no idea how many times we been asked to answer questions or do a survey about why, how, or when we lost our hearing etc. This why Botti took her time to made this thread and she did not have to do it . Yes it's an open forum but you do have understand people get tired of students coming here at the last moment to finish their homework and want us to do it for them.
I am sure there are deaf and HOH people where you live that you could talk or text to and you would get a lot more by being face to face than computer to computer. Your teacher should get out and meet some deaf and HOH their self they would lean a lot more this way too.
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We are eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeverywwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwheeere.... :D I don't know about you guys, but being deaf I have nothing better to do than to sit around my house awaiting any possible questions that come my way! Work? Pffffft, who has time for work and a real life when you're deaf? Certainly not me. :P
 
amylynne said:
I believe you've misunderstood the thread title. It's not "your questions answered here" as in "feel free to ask your survey questions". It's "your questions answered here" as in "Your questions have very likely already been answered on this forum. In this thread we direct you to some of the places where that has happened. Please stop asking them." This is my understanding: it's Botti's thread, so she can correct me if I've misunderstood as well.
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amylynne: My apologies. I definitely misunderstood the purpose of this forum. Hopefully these past several posts will be a warning to students in the future not to misinterpret the thread title as I did. I am sorry that I have made you angry; that was not my intention in the slightest. And I am very sorry that my approach offended you; it was something that I had seen executed successfully in previous posts, and my only intention was to learn. To clarify, my indication that my teacher had approved an online approach was in regard to the accusation that I was cheating, not my response to the negativity I received. Also, I accept full responsibility for misunderstanding the negative responses. I had assumed that I was being shut down because people thought it was an inappropriate way to approach a class assignment, not because they took offense to the questions themselves. Again, my apologies. Had I understood your responses to my question the first time, I would have left you alone a lot sooner. Presenting the frustration and anger of your culture at being repeatedly asked for information was an excellent suggestion; thank you. I will definitely include that in my report. The anger and frustration directed at me personally in your post literally made me cry; hopefully that will assuage your rage a bit. Again, sorry to bother you so much.

whatdidyousay!: I am sorry that I made you feel this way. For the record, this wasn't a last-minute ditch effort to get a grade; I have no deaf friends or family, I go to a very small school with no deaf students, and I have no transportation in order to access a live deaf community. I would love to ask my questions face to face, but that option is not available to me. I sought out this forum the minute I got home from class in hopes of gaining the insight I desired into your culture; unfortunately, I obviously went about it in a very wrong way. I tried to ask for information as respectfully as I could, and I am very sorry that it came off as a disrespectful intrusion. None of my questions were about why, how, or when you lost your hearing; I know that doesn't really make a difference, but I just wanted to throw that out there. Again, sorry to be a bother.

Bottesini: See above.
 
You know what, I'm about tired of these damn generalized questions about the deaf community, so I'm going to give you some real answers to take back to your teacher.

1. Are you deaf or hard-of-hearing?

A) Deaf

2. If not, how did you become a part of a deaf/hoh community? If so, how long have you been a part of the deaf/hoh community?

A) Irrelevant, I'm deaf.

3. What country do you live in? If you live in the US, what state?

A) I live in Florida. ( United States )

4. What does your community look like? I.E. are you part of a deaf/hoh family, school, club, etc.? (If you are the only deaf/hoh person in your immediate acquaintance, feel free to skip question 5.)

A) What does our community look like? How about I have friends just like hearies do! What does your community look like? Do you all go to concerts? Do you all like sports? Or are you all different and like various types of things? You must all be the same since you are all united by hearing, correct? Are you part of a hearing family? Now, doesn't that question sound stupid when I read it back to you?

5. What is unique about your deaf/hoh culture? In other words, are there any traditions, shared values, or activities (besides using sign language) that set you apart from the hearing communities in your area?

I actually laughed out loud at this one. Other than signing, what TRADITIONS do the deaf share? Well, I hear on Sunday's us deaf like to gather up at Starbucks and drink coffee! Followed by a brief rain dance in the parking lot, to grant our crops a plentiful harvest. What part of we're the same as you, are you not getting? We are deaf, you're hearing.... we communicate with ASL, and you communicate by speaking..... We're all individuals with different likes and interests. Some deaf people play the disabled card and sit back and are lazy. Some deaf people ( myself included ) busts her arse at work every day to make sure I can live! You know what unites us? The fact hearing people place such an emphasis on us being so different from them. Shared Values? Again, you're just assuming all deaf people are the same, but different than hearies. Some deaf people value monogamy and getting married before having kids. Some deaf people value staying single and living it up! We.... are.... all.... UNIQUE! We all have our own thoughts and opinions. Same with activities. Sure, sometimes we have deaf expos to check out what's new of the new ect ect. or even here we have a deaf coffee chat, but don't hearing people meet up with their friends or groups to have coffee? I think so.

6. How are the deaf/hoh viewed by the hearing in your country/state/area?

A) I'm sure we're viewed by each individual differently. Depending on the individuals stance on the deaf or HoH depends on the view. So you might want to go talk to the hundreds of thousands of hearies in my state and see what they say. I'm deaf, I can't speak for how a hearie will view me, nor do I really give a crap.

7. How does the hearing community in general treat your culture? Are they usually respectful, or are you often misunderstood/mistreated?

A) In my personal experience, my favorite is when I tell a hearing person I'm deaf in Walmart when I'm checking out or something, so they talk to me louder and slower... like I have a mental retardation issue going on. I hear this is a common issue among my deaf friends. Misunderstood? Oh come on, being born deaf I'm sure I have the voice of an ANGEL! Who could misunderstand that?! The fact is, what you "hear" and what I am saying are two different things. I also love being treated like I'm a helpless baby when people find out I'm deaf. "Oh you poor thing, I'm sorry you're deaf!" *rolls eyes*

8. What is the most culturally sensitive (appropriate/polite) way for a hearing person to interact with a deaf/hoh person when starting a conversation?

A) Culturally...... sensitive? So now you're definitely treating deafness as a total handicap. Culturally.....sensitive! WOW! How about you address us with the same respect, eye contact and treatment you'd engage a hearing person with? How's that for culturally sensitive addressing...... Seriously! No, you should show up with aluminum head gear and start making weird gestures and shaping dog food into pictures..... *rolls eyes*

9. (Optional) What is the worst experience you have had while interacting with someone from a hearing culture?

A) You should just go to the thread ( terrible hearing people stories ) and print out some of those. I'm sure most of the deafies here could spend HOURS if not DAYS giving you examples of those! As for myself, where do I begin? In high school being pushed, shoved, made fun of, hit, and even spit on.... how's that for a start? Is that what you want to hear? Or how about now, the fact that I'm a certified P.A. in school Full time pursuing my M.D. degree, and people still talk to me like I'm 5? How's that for you? Does what I'm writing to you look like a 5 year old did it? Oh, but I sound messed up so obviously I must be stupid.

10. (Optional) What is the best experience you have had while interacting with someone from a hearing culture?

A) Good damn question! I wouldn't say I've had any "stellar" performers from the hearing community in my life. I have hearing friends, yes. However, I don't think I've ever had a "best experience" with any of them, none that I can be like WOW LOOK AT THAT HEARIE GO! I'd say they're all about average. Good friends, nice to have around.... people I can trust, but nothing that has set a dent in my brain to remember super things by. I like those people. They treat me normal and like the rest of their friends so I don't remember "stellar hearie performances." I like the real ones, those are my friends, hearing or not.


11. If you could get all of those in the hearing community to listen to you for one moment, what would you tell them? (This is less of a formal question, and more of an opportunity for you to add any information or opinions that the previous questions did not allow for.)

Stop...... putting...... such...... a friggin....... EMPHASIS.... on the fact we're DEAF! Why can't you just look at people as people, and move on with your day? What is a culturally correct way to interact with me? Look me in the eyes, treat me with RESPECT! Don't act like I'm some poor disabled baby and I need your charity or help! I don't want it! I'm 26 years old and have managed just fine so far in life without others charity and pity. I'm a deaf medical student for crying out loud! How many people told me I couldn't? TONS! I don't care what you, or any other person out there thinks of me. I'm the same as everyone hearing and not out there, and yet different. I'm a person, I have feelings, thoughts, desires, ambition and drive. I'm a person, I have different feelings, thoughts, desires, ambition and drive than the person next to me, or the person next to them. You get such a terrible reaction from these questions because if you flipped them and asked a hearing person these exact questions, they'd look at you the same way most of us look at you when you ask them to us.... Like WTF is wrong with them?! You get smart ass answers because the questions you're asking are terrible, judgmental and creating massive assumptions. Why can't people treat people the same?! deaf, black, white, gay, straight or whatever! Treat people with respect, dignity and treat them genuinely, and that's how you will make it far in life. Stop putting such an emphasis on what's different and start focusing on how we're the same. Don't put your focus on bashing what you hate or what is different, place your focus and strength into encouraging things you love and the similarities we have as people..... not "deaf people."

Just print this out...... and hand it to your teacher. Is your teacher deaf or HoH? Just a question. My hostility goes out to a person that would make students go out and seek these answers from deaf people, and is "making" you have a real response. I'm deaf, there's your real response for your teacher. :P
 
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Falkyn said:
amylynne: My apologies. I definitely misunderstood the purpose of this forum. Hopefully these past several posts will be a warning to students in the future not to misinterpret the thread title as I did. I am sorry that I have made you angry; that was not my intention in the slightest. And I am very sorry that my approach offended you; it was something that I had seen executed successfully in previous posts, and my only intention was to learn. To clarify, my indication that my teacher had approved an online approach was in regard to the accusation that I was cheating, not my response to the negativity I received. Also, I accept full responsibility for misunderstanding the negative responses. I had assumed that I was being shut down because people thought it was an inappropriate way to approach a class assignment, not because they took offense to the questions themselves. Again, my apologies. Had I understood your responses to my question the first time, I would have left you alone a lot sooner. Presenting the frustration and anger of your culture at being repeatedly asked for information was an excellent suggestion; thank you. I will definitely include that in my report. The anger and frustration directed at me personally in your post literally made me cry; hopefully that will assuage your rage a bit. Again, sorry to bother you so much.
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Responding to the two bolded parts: You're right, you weren't making excuses, and you did present it that way - you were responding to the suggestion that you were cheating, not to the forum concerns themselves. I'm sorry that got by me. I think I have such a sensitivity to that idea that I reacted as though it was happening. I'm sorry for that. And for making you cry. (I'm not angry anymore. Not because you were crying, but because I understand that you weren't using your teacher's instruction as a justification.)

To the second bolded part, just to be clear, it's not my culture. I'm hearing like you, trying to be respectful of the culture, learning what that means as I go.
 
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