Rude Girlfriend?

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Pepsi

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My son's girlfriend said something yesterday that piss me off. She is having a little trouble hearing sometimes and my daughter said to her that maybe she needs to get her hearing test and might need HAs and the girlfriend said " I'm not getting HAs they are for old people" I got piss off and told her ass off. My family thinks I'm making too much out of it. What do you think? was I wrong to say anything?
 
Honestly, I think the girl said it out of fear and denial rather than being rude. Yes, it was rude of her but I dont think she was thinking when she said that. It sounded more like a defense mechanism. My dad used to say that when his hearing first started deteriorating in his 40s. He would say HAs are for old people. To this day, he still denies it. I just figured that instead of taking it personal, I try to be as supportive as I can. Maybe, instead of telling her ass off (unless she has a rude personality in general) tell her about your deafness and your experience with HAs. If she doesnt respond well to that, it probably means she isnt ready to come to terms with her hearing loss.

Hope that helps!
 
shel90 said:
Honestly, I think the girl said it out of fear and denial rather than being rude. Yes, it was rude of her but I dont think she was thinking when she said that. It sounded more like a defense mechanism. My dad used to say that when his hearing first started deteriorating in his 40s. He would say HAs are for old people. To this day, he still denies it. I just figured that instead of taking it personal, I try to be as supportive as I can. Maybe, instead of telling her ass off (unless she has a rude personality in general) tell her about your deafness and your experience with HAs. If she doesnt respond well to that, it probably means she isnt ready to come to terms with her hearing loss.

Hope that helps!
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:gpost: Very well put!
 
sounds like a young persons comment.....any thought that pops in head.....not trying to offend anyone.
and denial.......young want to be invincible....and ffears of being judged.
yeah I think you blew it out of proportion telling her off....could have just tried to talk about it. supportive.
takes time sometimes
and not everyone wants to wear a hearing aid jsut cuz impaired...me included....hate the damn things...unless in school or need for work.
 
Hearing aids are for old people? :laugh2:

Just like Shel90 said she hasn't come in terms with her hearing loss, let her be, she'll learn the hard way down the road.
 
I pity her thinking hearing aids are for old people.

No matter what age, ANYONE can have hearing loss. I guess she's just stubborn so her problem then.
 
today I just saw a 3 month old baby wearing 2 hearing aids. of course they ARE for OLD people. such an inaccurate belief. hearing aids are there for a reason and that reason is to help hard of hearing/deaf people hear better.

unless she's comfortable having trouble understanding people, acting like HAs are for old people is not gonna help her much.
 
I agree with Shel and others. I said the same thing when my hearing started to deteriorate, too. And, I am quite sure I also said the same thing when I found out that I needed glasses, too.
 
That was a very unfair statement for her to say. It shows ignorance.

If I had that thought, I wouldn't really be able to go out and be like everyone else... I'd miss everything that was said unless someone took me aside and spoke to me very slowly. Besides, I was three when I got HAs so I didn't think about it. All I knew is that they would make me be able to hear.
 
Just a kid talking! No need to get angry or telling the kid off....Kids don't wanna be "different". Besides, its up to the girl's parents to take her in for a hearing test....I was HOH before I became totally deaf, and was told a lot of times that "she just hears what she wants to hear".....Never wore a hearing aid in my life, but if it would help me, I sure would! I'm an adult, not a child, tho'.
 
Pepsi said:
My son's girlfriend said something yesterday that piss me off. She is having a little trouble hearing sometimes and my daughter said to her that maybe she needs to get her hearing test and might need HAs and the girlfriend said " I'm not getting HAs they are for old people" I got piss off and told her ass off. My family thinks I'm making too much out of it. What do you think? was I wrong to say anything?
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Wrong to say it? well let's just say.... you could have handled it differently. What she said is no different from kid and glasses.

As a kid, I didn't want to wear glasses because I didn't want to be viewed as uncool or nerdy. I always felt embarrassed whenever I wear glasses to read what was written on board. I put it on and then quickly remove it when I was done with it. It took me quite a while to "accept" it.

I suppose same thing with her and HA issue. She'll resolve it within herself.... along with some friendly words from adults to correct her misconception.
 
my dad refused to wear HAs since his hearing start to declined alittle when i asked him if he would and he was too subborn to get the test. I can image how he feels

i am not sure what the GF felt dunno
 
Cowpuppy said:
sounds like a young persons comment.....any thought that pops in head.....not trying to offend anyone.
and denial.......young want to be invincible....and ffears of being judged.
yeah I think you blew it out of proportion telling her off....could have just tried to talk about it. supportive.
takes time sometimes
and not everyone wants to wear a hearing aid jsut cuz impaired...me included....hate the damn things...unless in school or need for work.
Click to expand...



:gpost:
 
As a child I was very very senstive about my deafness. I refused to talk about it because I was so ashamed and I am sure I had made nasty comments about deaf people who used sign language. It didnt mean that I hated them or thought badly of them. It meant I thought badly of myself. It is probably what this girl is going through right now.
 
After reading some post. I think your guys are right I could have handled it better than I did. I'm easily offended I think that's one of my problems because it felt like a personal attack towards me. I did tell her before about AD and told her my user name a few times. Yes,she is young only 20 years old.She knows about deaf/ hard of hearing its nothing new to her. She told me this morning ( after I made this thread) that she was sorry and for some reason she brings me over two bottles of Pepsi.

Thanks guys for your posts you all are a big help :)
 
She should get her hearing tested but my son said she won't.
 
Pepsi said:
After reading some post. I think your guys are right I could have handled it better than I did. I'm easily offended I think that's one of my problems because it felt like a personal attack towards me. I did tell her before about AD and told her my user name a few times. Yes,she is young only 20 years old.She knows about deaf/ hard of hearing its nothing new to her. She told me this morning ( after I made this thread) that she was sorry and for some reason she brings me over two bottles of Pepsi.

Thanks guys for your posts you all are a big help :)
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awww that's so sweet of her to make peace with you. It is great that both of you shook hands and it's all water under the bridge. problem solved!

:grouphug:
 
Pepsi said:
After reading some post. I think your guys are right I could have handled it better than I did. I'm easily offended I think that's one of my problems because it felt like a personal attack towards me. I did tell her before about AD and told her my user name a few times. Yes,she is young only 20 years old.She knows about deaf/ hard of hearing its nothing new to her. She told me this morning ( after I made this thread) that she was sorry and for some reason she brings me over two bottles of Pepsi.

Thanks guys for your posts you all are a big help :)
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I am glad about the Pepsi. I think she was trying to tell you she realized she was not very sensitive to you and she loves you. :)
 
Pepsi said:
She should get her hearing tested but my son said she won't.
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understandable. but really - it's entirely her choice. she'll come to term with her hearing issue on her own at her own time. You know it's bad enough that we have to deal with our audi pushing us to get CI whenever we go there.

then I suppose you or your son can provide the support that she will need when she asks for it.
 
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