Proud mom of a two year old with CI :)

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mylittlemen

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My name is Michelle(I am hearing) and I am proud to say that I have given my profoundly deaf son the opportunity to develope speech and language alongside his peers. My son was implanted at 12 months (a year ago yesterday) and is doing wonderfully. He hears at 20dbs across the board , receptivley he is understanding almost everything that is said to him and he is saying approx 50 words. We have used basic sign language since he was 2 months old and he still uses some signs. My son LOVES his CI and wants it put on immediatley when he gets up in the morning. He is a very happy, social little boy. I want to say that I know that he will always be deaf and I am not under any illusion that he isn't. If he were to decide someday that he did not want to wear his CI then that is fine with me but if I were to wait (like soime of you seem to suggest) until he was 18 years old to get a CI he would not have the ability to develope normal speech. From the threads I have been reading it seems like alot of you have very strong opinions about people doing what I have chosen to do and that is fine with me. The thing that is disturbing is how uneducated about Ci's some people are and that some of you have these opinions about something you obviously know very little about. I respectyour choice to live without a CI and I don't understand why some of you are so threatened by people getting them. Talking about banning them! lol I can promise you that that will never hapopen. Medical science has done a wonderful thing for many people as far as CI's go. Don't be close minded.
 
That's good to see that you're open minded to the pros and cons of having your child implanted with a CI at such a young age. I, myself, am not much for children in obtaining a CI, but I respect those who do. As long as the children are happy with having a CI and benefiting from it. My step son got his when he was nearly 2 -- fourteen years ago and he still wears it today. He did have doubts about continuing with using it when he hit his teens, but now he's OK with it.
I have a CI myself and I obtained it 3 years ago and so far, it's going great guns...:) The only downside to it is that I get headaches if I wear it for more than 4 or 6 hours. Oh well...better than having tinnitus which went away after the surgery.
 
Let me say this....

I am not closed mind when it comes to CI....The Only point of having a CI on a child who is no part of the choice or decision in this....could have such implications and an impact in your relationship with the child in his/her later years...I believe a child OUGHT to be a part of the decision in this....I still stand for what I believe that a child should wait until the age of 7!....

I do know that having CI on babies or small children would help develop speech and language skills which I agree on that part but still one thing is left out and that is the Child's Choice..

I respect the choice you made on your son and it is good to hear he is happy for now!...I surely hope you respect my view as well as I respect yours!...

Have a great day and Good luck!.. :)
 
I know that most Deaf people feel threatened because those PRO-CI people are trying to badger and nitpick on us to get cochlear implants and never respecting our decision not to have CIs put in ourselves. If I meet someone with CIs, I won't mind at all. But that is until he says something to try to push me to get CIs, I get turned off and feel threatened. You respect me and I respect you. Period.
 
:werd: I absolutely agree with Deaf258, as it goes both ways!....Respect us as we Respect them!
 
Hi Michelle!
I think those Deaf people who are against CIs, are against them b/c they associate them with oralism and not signing. I know most Deafies are OK with CIs if ASL is used along with speech. Even many oral sucesses wish they'd had the oppertunity to learn ASL along with speech. I think the key is to continue speech and spoken language therapy...but ALSO don't forget that ASL and Deaf culture can be of value. I know your son's HOH, (with the CI) and I know that the professional opinion is that hoh have more in common with hearing then with deaf and don't need traditional Deaf ed techniques. That's the wrong way to go about it...I can guareentee you that he will fall through the cracks!
but if I were to wait (like soime of you seem to suggest) until he was 18 years old to get a CI he would not have the ability to develope normal speech.
Click to expand...
Maybe, maybe not. There are people who are profoundly prelingally Hoh(they hear very little even WITH hearing aids) and who managed to develop good speech and language. One of the things that I'm concerned about is misdx on how severe or not the loss is. It's hard to tell with babies how well or how not well they hear. Ask our parents....many of us here (even those of us with profound losses) played the "Now I hear you, now I don't " Game as babies.
 
closed mind?
I am not...
I´m the same as Angel´s opinion.
I´m total disagree to implant on the babies & toddler because they didn´t ask for it... They would lost their respect on me for this because they will feel that I´m not accept what they are, that´s why I rather to wait until my child is 7 years old, then..........

Look the 2 example... one person at other forum stated that she received her
first CI when she was 16 years old. She is 32 years old now & can speak well.
I´m British & move to live in Germany when I was 22 years old in 1985. I understand none of German languages until I learn Germans... Now I understand German now...
It means that we are WILLING to learn what we really want... That´s why I rather wait until my child is 7 years old to understand enough what they
want or not... I would support their decision because it´s their body, if they really want to have it & willing to learn their speech development,
like what I with German.

It´s good to hear that you are happy with your choice. I respect your
choice but you should do the same with mine, too....

Please don´t say that we are closed minded because we have different view
than yours... Thank you...

Have a nice day....
 
The problem is that just because someone who gets a CI later in life learns to talk well doesnt' mean that if they had gotten it as a baby they wouldn't be talking better now. I have yet to meet a profoundly hoh of hearing person that speakes JUST like a hearing person. While they may be able to speak well and with perfect grammer there is still something different about their speech, and actually the same applies to people I've met that weren't so profoundly HOH. Getting a CI, as many of you have stated, does mean a person is now hearing; they haven't left the deaf world. Your not taking a way apart of a person but it does help in gaining a different perspective.
 
Your Story doesn't even Match up mylittlemen. How can a 2 yrs old be happy with a CI and gets up in the morning and put it on? That is very hard to believe...Because 2 yrs old is very young and Not fully Responsible 2 yrs old are young children...Therefore You also stated that your child learned signs at 2 months old... Mum. I never heard of a baby learned signs at 2 months old you'll be the first to tell me that. I have a feeling you are force your son to wear them and force to learn speech and language. I don't think u wanted your son to be totally Deaf. But Let me tell u one thing. There are deaf people out there that can SPEAK AND TALK with their voices and Doesn't have CI.

I am not closed minded about CI But I do not like the facts that a young child or baby gets implant at a young age and all they have to do is learn what about their life as being a child play? I feel bad for Kids out there who has CI At a young age and cannot be able to enjoy life as A Child.
 
You are parent and made a decision for your son which is fine w/ me. I felt that kids don't know any better til they get older and understand what they want to do w/ their body and life.

My husband and I have CI in our teens cuz our parents are hearing and pressured us to be alike as them.. They want us to be fittin in as a hearing.. W/ CI don't make us hearing.. Yes, it helped us to speak better and hear music but it ll never make us as perfect as hearing.. I asked my doc about that having CI will be same as hearing,??, and Doc honestly said no cuz it ll make you HOH. My husband developed tinnistus.. I developed vertigo w/ it.. wait and see what happen to your son. he s too young to tell you how he feels.. wait til he is in teens or adult, he ll open up and tell you how he feels w/ it.. You cannot predict how he feels cuz you don't wear CI yourself. I didn't tell my mom til around i was 24 yrs old and she asked me abt it . I was honest w/ her cuz I know i m living on my own and she cannot kick me ha ha. Yes, she was disappointed at first but later on, she told me if we do it all over, she prefers me left that way, being naturally deaf.. using hearing aid.

My husband is oral all of his life .. he is profoundly deaf. many people said his speech is very excellent..He went to oral deaf institute since he was a baby. he uses regular hearing aid til he was in teens. he got his CI and it improves his speech a bit. but not big difference as his parents said. He learned sign language when he first met me and I taught him deaf culture.. He admitted later to me he felt sign language is natural to him than oral ..( he never learns ASL when he was young til age 19 ) I asked him why is it natural to him since it s not his first language? He said well, it requires my eyes and hands to connect so it s comfortable to him.. He still talks orally to his parents and sisters. He prefers sign to our hearing daughter rather than orally talk to her.

I think your son will show what is his preference when he is older, and don't go against his wishes when you dont like that way. I used to be that way w/ my parents til I got older and expressed my wishes to them. They backed off and accepted who i am. We are close knit family now.

My prayer goes to you and your son in future! Don't let anything go between you and him like deaf culture, etc.. support him whatever he wants to be in future. :) either use CI or not.
 
Cheri said:
Your Story doesn't even Match up mylittlemen. How can a 2 yrs old be happy with a CI and gets up in the morning and put it on? That is very hard to believe...Because 2 yrs old is very young and Not fully Responsible 2 yrs old are young children...Therefore You also stated that your child learned signs at 2 months old... Mum. I never heard of a baby learned signs at 2 months old you'll be the first to tell me that. I have a feeling you are force your son to wear them and force to learn speech and language. I don't think u wanted your son to be totally Deaf. But Let me tell u one thing. There are deaf people out there that can SPEAK AND TALK with their voices and Doesn't have CI.

I am not closed minded about CI But I do not like the facts that a young child or baby gets implant at a young age and all they have to do is learn what about their life as being a child play? I feel bad for Kids out there who has CI At a young age and cannot be able to enjoy life as A Child.
Click to expand...


First off Cheri ..maybe your reading skills aren't very good because you are misquoting me..where do I begin? I did not say that my two year old outs his CI on by himself ..I said "He wants it put on" ..which he very much does ..as a matter of fact if the coil happens to fall off while playing (yes imagine that my child with a CI gets to play!!! ) ...next I did not say my son signed at two months old..I SAID that we signed with him since he was two months old..
Thanks for the news flash but I am very aware that there are deaf people that can speak and talk with their voices ..I have met many of them ..I have also met many teenagers who were implanted when they were two and told me that their parents getting them CI's was the best thing they ever did for them. Thank you very much.
Next to answer your ridiculous comment..my son thoroughly enjoys his life as a child. Please explain to me why it is that a child with a CI wouldn't enjoy their life?
And lastly your are %100 correct I do not want my son to be completely deaf..IMAGINE the horror in that??? Being deaf is a handicap wether you choose to believe it or not..I chose to give him a tool that can make his life in this World a little easier....

To the rest of you who think that age 7 is some magic age where kids are old enough to make life decisions..a child being implanted at age 7 does not even have compareable resluts to a child implanted at twelve months. As a matter of fact it would just make the road even harder. ..nevermind waiting until he was a teenager.

I do have a couple questions for all of you that I am curious about... I
#1 If you love being deaf and think it is so wonderful..why do you wear hearing aids???????

#2 If your child lost a limb as a baby would you get them a prosthetic or would you wait until they were 7 to ask them if they wanted it or not?
 
mylittlemen said:
First off Cheri ..maybe your reading skills aren't very good because you are misquoting me..where do I begin? I did not say that my two year old outs his CI on by himself ..I said "He wants it put on" ..which he very much does ..as a matter of fact if the coil happens to fall off while playing (yes imagine that my child with a CI gets to play!!! ) ...next I did not say my son signed at two months old..I SAID that we signed with him since he was two months old..
Thanks for the news flash but I am very aware that there are deaf people that can speak and talk with their voices ..I have met many of them ..I have also met many teenagers who were implanted when they were two and told me that their parents getting them CI's was the best thing they ever did for them. Thank you very much.
Next to answer your ridiculous comment..my son thoroughly enjoys his life as a child. Please explain to me why it is that a child with a CI wouldn't enjoy their life?
And lastly your are %100 correct I do not want my son to be completely deaf..IMAGINE the horror in that??? Being deaf is a handicap wether you choose to believe it or not..I chose to give him a tool that can make his life in this World a little easier....

To the rest of you who think that age 7 is some magic age where kids are old enough to make life decisions..a child being implanted at age 7 does not even have compareable resluts to a child implanted at twelve months. As a matter of fact it would just make the road even harder. ..nevermind waiting until he was a teenager.

I do have a couple questions for all of you that I am curious about... I
#1 If you love being deaf and think it is so wonderful..why do you wear hearing aids???????

#2 If your child lost a limb as a baby would you get them a prosthetic or would you wait until they were 7 to ask them if they wanted it or not?
Click to expand...

you made some good points..

I would give my child a prosthetic arm so my child can develop the skills usin it early than later on when the child is older and will be awkward using it.

I asked my husband about hearing aid and CI. He prefers hearing aid cuz it don't cause him to have tinnitus. Hearing aid gave you more natural feeling than CI does. hearing aid give you sound wave from the outside and CI gave you inside sound from outside w/o going thru ear canal. Some people feel comfortable w/ hearing aids or CI either way.

I never wore hearing aids myself cuz it doesn't benefit me and I couldn't hear anything with hearing aids. For this reason I got CI and heard for first time in my teens. I hate it since. cuz I was not used to it when I grow up.

It might be different experience for your son cuz he got it real young and it ll might benefit him better than later in his teen life than we went thru ourselves.
 
Hello Michelle...everyone...

I know I said I wouldn't touch any more CI threads, but...all right, just shoot me. I do have something I'd like to add.

I'm not taking any sides here. I'm sure everyone has their reasons for believing in what they do and I completely respect that. This is what it's all about. RESPECT. If you are deaf and you feel as if you're functioning just fine with only hearing aids, then great! I'm happy for you as you are. If you want the CI, then that's also good, and I hope you get out of the CI what you hope to get - more hearing, more awareness...whatever it is that you WANT out of it.

HOWEVER, what I believe my friend Cheri was saying was that it's an incredibly tough choice to make. I'm 25 years old...I just got my CI when I was 23. I was re-implanted at the end of last month because I came down with meningitis which almost landed me into an early grave. It is believed that the positioner which (at the time) was used to hold in the electrodes was responsible for the meningitis because when a spacer is used, it allows a place for infection to build up and fester. The re-implantation was originally only suggested to remove the spacer, but we decided to let him re-implant me with a Nucleus.

But yes, I would give my child a prosthetic limb immediately if he or she needed one. But with CI's, we are dealing with brain surgery, basically. Please do not take this the wrong way. I mean no disrespect to you for your choices. I have every confidence that you had your son implanted because you felt that it was the best thing for him. You wanted him to have more opportunities, which you've stated, and that's fine. All I am trying to do here is point out some of the reasons Cheri feels the way she does. Your son, I am sure, is enjoying himself and is healthy, and that's terrific. BUT - with a CI, there is a lot of maintenance involved. The mappings, the auditory training, the speech therapy, the constant trips to the audiologist for hearing tests, the practicing, the learning. Learning of course, is natural for any child, not only deaf ones, but I am sure that, as a parent, you are very much aware of the fact that there's a lot of work involved in which to reap the full benefits of a CI.

You also do have to keep in mind that your son is the one who has a "foreign" object in his head...(the implant). He is still too young to fully understand it and what it is...but at seven years old, he would certainly be able to decide whether or not he would like to hear more, or he's happy the way he is, with hearing aids. That is, if they were effective. He would be able to say yes, I want to hear more, or NO, I'm happy the way I am.

I was born profoundly deaf...and I had one hell of a time while growing up. I was brutally teased. I went home crying more often than I did smiling. This was with only hearing aids. CI's are far more noticeable than hearing aids, and your son is the one who is going to have to explain to his friends at school what it is and what it does for him. It's something I still have to explain to some ADULTS. My own BOSS at work still treats me like I'm a complete idiot. I've explained to her that it's a CI, it is to help me hear sounds better, etc, etc. Maybe SHE is the idiot. :::shrug:::

So, I'm sorry...but I'm for choice. There ARE good reasons to implant a child young, and those are for speech and language purposes...everything else kind of falls into that category anyway. A teenager would not be too old to get an implant, nor would it be too late for a teen-aged child to decide whether or not they want to go through the training involved. It IS frustrating. I have had trouble, myself...and I find it somewhat tiring to have to clear my schedule all the time or work things AROUND my next mapping sessions. But maybe I'm out of line here, because it's YOU who is going to have to take your child to have the mappings done, the therapy, etc. This is what Cheri means by your child missing out on some of the things that children who are not deaf would be doing instead. Truthfully, it is just a matter of making more time for that, and I'm sure you do. What's done is done...should you remove the CI from your son's head/ear, then that ear would no longer have ANY hearing capabilities, even with hearing aids...so now that he's implanted, then it's onwards from here, huh?

So good luck to you and to your adorable baby. :) This is a good place to go to chat with others about deaf issues, CI issues, and just about every other issue in the book. Welcome to AD...:::handshake:::...


Malfoyish
 
First of all the surgery required with a Ci is NOT "Brain surgery" or even remotley close to "brain surgery". I would ave expected someone who had the surgery to know a little more about the surgery itself..but anyways..
I would like to add that #1 my son had no benefit from hearing aids. He is very profoundly deaf and has been retested on his other ear and the results have remained the same.
#2 a baby that gets a CI at 12 months old requires far less therapy and training than a child that gets implanted at 7,8,9,10 years old. A baby that gets implanted at a very young age essentially developes language naturally. My son goes to the audiologist once every six months and has speech therapy 3 hours out of the week. As a matter of fact his speech therapy sessions involve playing, crafts, baking, and all sorts of fun things. He loves going. He has not missed out on one thing that my hearing son was able to do at his age.
As far as him being teased. I am not naive to the fact that children can be cruel, but I don'e see him being teased or looked down upon any more than a deaf child that cannot speak .

Finally , I would like to point out that I have no problem with how your friend cheri feels about Ci's or anything else..but when she tells me that "my story doesn't match up" and then misquotes me several times, then yes I do have a problem with that. Thank You.
 
Fine, but keep in mind that this IS a message board, and people WILL disagree with you. Not everyone concurs with everyone else, and that's only human nature. If you can't take it, then that's unfortunately, YOUR problem. You cannot be so defensive. After all, voicing OPINIONS is what message boards are all about. That's all Cheri did, and she wasn't wrong in doing so. Maybe she misunderstood something you said, and you corrected her, but you also seem to have a problem with other people pointing out our own opinions or thoughts on the subject...

I've had the surgery twice. I know plenty about it. What I mean about brain surgery is - they literally drill into the skull. It's a serious surgery and plenty of problems may or may not arise from it. ESPECIALLY with babies, whose heads haven't fully grown yet. Not to mention it is NOT fun to recover from a hole put in your skull. That I do know, and that I DO speak from experience on.

That's all I meant. So, good luck.

Malfoyish
 
And again, I do not have a problem with anyone's point of views on anything, otherwise I never would have posted, but If someone is going to put words in my mouth that I didn't say or start off by saying that my story "doesn't match up" I am going to correct them. If you or anyone else doesn't like that unfortunatley thats YOUR PROBLEM. Just as you all are going to share how you feel , I am going to do the same :cheers:

Also FYI there is a huge difference betwen brain surgery and drilling into the skull. The surgery for a CI is actually a very minor surgery nowadays and most patients go home the same day.
Also babies recover very quickly from the surgery, much faster than adults do. My son was back to his old self within two days. :D
 
I debated about jumping in the middle of this, but after thinking about it, I have a few things to say about this .

Technology is a WONDERFUL thing, when it WORKS! But, it doesn't always. Things can go wrong, and they DO go wrong. I also feel it is not wise to implant small children. It really IS a matter of personal choice, and a baby cannot make that choice for THEMSELVES. And, I'm sorry, but I think it is irresponsible for anyone to do that to a small child. This IS brain surgery, and while i agree that kids bounce back quicker, it is still traumatic for them, and they aren't capable of understanding what is happening to them.
 
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Sorry to you, it is not brain surgery or even remotely close :wiggle: and I would hardly call the surgery traumatic to my son anyways seeings as he was smiling in the recovery room eating poipsicles and bouncing around in his bed the next morning watching The Wiggles :lol:
Your right technology is a wonderful things and it is working wonderfully for my son.

Thanks for your opinion, and I am sorry to hear that you think it was irresponsible of me to have my son implanted. I am sure there are many people who share your opinion and it is duly noted, however I strongly disagree :D
 
I'm glad your son seems to have done well with it. I've just seen the other side of it, and I know that I couldn't put a kid through that. I should tell you that I am hearing, so maybe, I'm not as "qualified" to speak on the benefits of CI's as others may be, but a personal friend of mine has gone through this procedure, and it wasn't a pleasant one for her. So, having SEEN this side of it, I would NOT put a kid through it. At least, not until they were OLD enough to express how they feel about it themselves.
 
mylittlemen said:
#2 If your child lost a limb as a baby would you get them a prosthetic or would you wait until they were 7 to ask them if they wanted it or not?
Click to expand...


Pretty close to my current situation.....

My daughter has spina bifida and a shunt in her brain implanted in her skull located close to where a CI would usually be put in(to drain off the excess cerebrospinal fluid accumulating in her brain) when she was only 2 WEEKS old....

I would have leg braces and physical therapy started sooner so she can be able to get her walking. If I waited that LONG, she would take much longer and harder to adapt herself to her situations. Lucky me that she is now starting her physical therapy thru the Early Intervention service.

Remember the old adage: "It's hard to teach an old dog new tricks sometimes!"

If y'all thought raising a deaf kid was that hard.....Try mine!
 
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